Redemption

Redeeming...

Can I steal the tag of your New Year album?
Can I steal the smile on your face?
Can I steal the warmth of your hug when it snows?
Can I steal you again pretty face?

I am sorry her face was cream and chocolate
I am sorry her hair was milky brown
I am sorry she brought an early winter
I am sorry I took her to (your) bed.

We stood there when fast trains breezed by
We stood there to the song you never sung
We stood there to make unpromised promises
We stood there for our very first touch.

You were lost in pensive thought
You were lost in desirous hope
You were lost when I had looked away
You were lost when I had looked back.

I moved where the storm took me
I moved where the ostrich cried
I moved where order took me
I moved where you couldn’t pry.

I will search lost mountains
I will seek deep seas
I will traverse rugged landscape
(Where) I will hide with thee.

Put behind the dark, old alleys
Put behind the wrong, suave men
Put behind your false, pretentious smile
Put behind your impetuous fame.

Come where the river meets the ocean
Come where the sky kisses the sea
Come where expansive lovers unite
Come where I will find thee.

Can you close your eyes?
Can you ripen your wings?
Can you come close to me?
Can you kiss my lips?

Can I steal the tag of your New Year album?
Can I steal the smile on your face?
Can I steal the warmth of your hug when it snows?
Can I steal you again pretty face?

© Nothing Personal. January 03, 2011.

Reviews

[MuSe Ampoule]

In times of new years and resolutions so often we try to create new rather than rekindle old...for though love is lost...hope may be eternal. doesn't hurt to ask...right? For those who shamed themselves with indiscretions and taken responsibility sincerely...perhaps there is hope yet....
great pensive write and I loved the form with this.

[Loner]

A very lovely piece.

[Sunflower 20]

i love it!! its absolutely brilliant. and i can see that you have a signature in poetry. it really suits you!

Keep up the good work ^_^

[roarke]

Fresh format. Lots of mystery between the two. Good metaphors.

[JanieB]

Fabulous! I love the style you have used with this piece.

[Poetic Beauty]

this is a very descriptive poem about wanting and needing different things.

[Kita Tataki (Emily Conn..]

Wow, the repetition really makes this piece super powerful! So many adoring, romantic lines, so many moving stanzas... you really have talent with words, I look forward to reading more of your work. One of the first lines that hooked me to the poem is "Can I steal the warmth of your hug when it snows?" It's so cute and loving, it just makes me smile reading it. Wonderful job (:

[Calypso]

This was surly original.

[Meghan Rose]

i love the journey that this poem takes, from the speaker to the oceans and back again. i feel like each stanza could be a chapter in a book, or in a relationship, which i suspect was your intention. well done

[Kimberly]

This was very good. I love the repetition.

[George Love]

Very good, intersting form and the repeated first verse brings it full circle