Dices' inferno (complete) (forth darft)

I wrote this verse for a special person some one I'm crazy about they wanted a hard verse and this was the building block of the one that they kept asking for I wrote 4 drafts of this verse

Dice inferno (complete) (forth draft)
Please forgive me for this

To be found you must first be lost
F**k returning to a time when it made sense
I’ve made that journey before
I must confess my sins so I can finally rest in peace upon my death bed
I burned down the demon invested Amityville house
I burnt it to the f*****g ground
I was left with no choice
I tossed the poltergeist invested TV in the bathtub while it was plugged in
I sent the poltergeist back to hell, but yet it will still haunt me, so it be
Told the truth and it hurt so bad
So I won’t lie but this was always in the works
Time scars better than any razor blades, but razor blades are quicker
Hidden in plain sight is an idea
So what if I told everyone what they wanted to hear?
That I’m the f*****g same
Only then will I die or I could just kill you all the same and be done with it
With a simple apology I will forgive the world
But those who have scared me haven’t been forgot, but they seemed to have forgotten all about me
Looked into a 1000 different voids and found nothing but pain
So I buried it deep but not deep enough
Finally let the scars heal since I had another choice
Told someone, something, sometime
But as I spill out my life in these very pages and yet you will judge me
I look back only to realize I was never there or so I wish that were true
I will scar the beautiful face of nature
I’ll scar it deep and say “smile from now on b***h”
As I turn the key in the ignition I didn’t cut my own brakes for once
Looked across and saw the answer
I wanted to go away to a time
To a time where it will not hurt someone I adore, someone I care for
I wanted to let it go
F**k breaking another damn promise
It kills me on the inside
Left the keys on the table
Soon after midnight
I plan to tear the inner you inside and out
Then this inferno will burn brighter than any dark sun rise
Trust me on that
Someone called but I sent it to voice mail
I tossed the phone in the trash
To think only a few back I left a voice mail message stating out my life
But as I say this I wonder if it ever got heard
Night, night to the forever nightmares
Got to stop being scared of them for once in my life
I’ll see them when I lay to rest unless I die before that
As I toss you into the bathtub you plead for mercy but I’m all out
I start to cut you up with a hacksaw
I’ll keep telling my self
Forgive thy enemy’s nothing hurts them more
F**k saying that nothing hurts more than hacking someone up while they are alive
Maybe one day that little girl will stop playing with them nightmare dolls she’s so fond of
I’ll have to ask whom gave her those dolls
She whispers into my ear something I should know so well
The light cast darkness and in the darkness shadows grow
So I reply in kindness, when you can’t look on the bright side I’ll sit with you in the dark
I should never had dug up the past memories so why did I I’ll keep asking my self
Left Pandora’s Box hidden in plain sight wasn’t right to find it so easy
So do me something in return you as the fans owe me that
Buy my book I’ll refund you if needs be
Set fire to it I’ll pay for the petrol and matches
Release me from these very pages
I’m forever bound in a hell you won’t even see
Let alone act like you know what I’m talking about
I was never part of your property so why say I was?
So stop telling everyone what you think they want to hear
They’ve had enough of your bullshit, me along side that too
So let me finish this verse for the last time
Maybe then it will stop haunting me in the nightmare world
A world I’ve claimed ownership too to many times before
You say that I’m in your sweetest dreams
So I say that you’re in my nightmares
Let’s see if you can handle this
I’m forever in the coldness
I’m on the edge of all insanity
I could kill over my nightmares and at points I would
I want to set fire to both the world and hell
All to prove points, that it can be done so easily
F**k falling from grace
Not being able to pick yourself up after failing
I know it all so well shame you don’t know what I’m trying to say
Because I don’t think you will ever really understand me not after hearing the truth
As I hit my carpenter on speed dial he tells me the 1000th coffin is on him well it seems only fair I
keep him in business let’s hope he remembers that
She made a demon fall in love
The demon who fall in love handed her a Rubik’s cube and she smashed it against the wall and said
no more gimmicks
She placed her hand on the demons chest feeling its heart beating; she caused the demon to evolve
into an angel
And as an angel I plan to kidnap the devil only to call it fair
Then I’ll be the very angel who scared the face of father time with the words
As I dig in the medicine cabinet I search for my antidepressants meds but found a reason to toss
them down the sink and say good bye for ever
My last words upon my death bed were
Dices inferno

Yours truly
Shads’

Author's Note

I wouldn't have enough space to leave you a note for this verse