My AWSOME prologue, (you will definately like it)

This is only the beginning of my story, but if you like it, you can visit my website to see more of it!

     The watery moonlight lit up the darkened room as the bitter wind blew past the window.  “I know they are coming.”  A cold, hard voice echoed through the sheer silence.  “But they should be no threat to me, they ARE only little brats.”   The stars glimmered in the night-sky as if trembling in anticipation for what was to come.  The leafless branches clattered together like a band of tribes playing wooden instruments.   

     With a grimace, she spoke, “Although, I have to keep sharp, if they detect my weakness, it will be easy for them to walk all over me.  This time, I cannot lose.” 

     Taking a deep breath, she stood up weakly, and looked deep into her own mind.  “The orb is ready.”  She reported to herself with her eyes still tightly shut.  There was a long moment of silence, until someone replied. 

     “M-Master, you are doing,” he paused as he paced the floor, “horribly well.” Taking a long breath, he drew back the ripped up material that hung over the window.  The light dimly shone into the room, giving him the least bit of happiness. 

     “Did I ASK you to open that?”  She growled as she laid herself down on the smooth floor. 

     “S-Sorry, I just thought that…” 

     “Oh just be quiet!”  She shrieked, anger thundering in her icy blue eyes.  “Look, all you are here for is to look tough, strong, massive… when they arrive, you get the idea, right stupid?” 

     He nodded, shivering with fright from her terrifying glare.  Her stare felt like razor-sharp claws raking down his back.

     “I will try as hard as I can.”  He said softly, re-assuring both himself and his queen that he was capable of doing so.  

     Just then, a bright pink light started to filter in through the window.  The room was lit up with all different colours as the burning sun raised itself over the darkened hill tops.  “For now, you need to practice on acting tough.”  She said bitterly as she slowly made her way towards her bed.  He stared at her as he listened to what she had to say next.  “I’ll see you tonight-oh and one more thing,”  “Yes?”  He answered, prepared for what he was about to hear.  She spoke with her last breathe of air, “this plan is not a fail…”

Author's Note

I REALLY hope you like it, i'm trying to make my story favoured by people.

Reviews

[Katie de Lavani]

Question: So you say that you are writing a novel. I visited your site and it says you have already written books. Are they published?
The prologue was a bit confusing, but that's what they're supposed to be like, haha. I'm also writing a book if you want to check it out. Can't wait to see more of the story

[Griffin Hill]

Very nice intro. Well constructed. Good use of dialogue.