forgot who i was

I miss the person I use to be 

I miss the real smile 

I miss the real laughs 

I miss enjoying the small things every day 

But now DRUGS feel like one of the only ways to be happy 

I have lost true friends during this process 

I've lost family 

I've lost trust 

I've burnt bridges that feel impossible to build again

I feel emotionally drained every day 

The thoughts in my head are becoming too much 

The feelings I feel when I got the shot ready is not what it should be

It's like happiness depends on what's in the syringe and how fucked up I can get on it 

Because the drug makes me feel like I haven't lost the person I use to be 

It makes me feel like that persons still their 

But the sad thing is, is that that's the only emotion that's fake 

And I dont want it to be true but it is 

And Now I'm  back to the beginning where the cycle begins again

And this time I don't care 

Author's Note

One day I'll figure it out just not today