A Mere Idea

I finally have something for you to read :D

My beauty is picturesque
And my aroma beyond tantalizing
They call me the flower of passion
But look past what most can see

I'm not the delicate flower
Who's petals blow away
I'll cling to hope and stand my ground
To tell you what I have to say

I mark just a mere proposal
Of that single idea you got in your head
That made you ask 'Will you marry me?'
Of a girl whom you wished wed

Taken aback she was simply stunned
You placed in her hand but a rose
An everlasting symbol of love
The only thing one needs to propose

No sound escaped her lips
 Your words rendering her speech-less
Though somehow she managed to answer
Whispering to you that simple yes

A ring would come with time
When bonds could never be broken
When feelings wouldn't change
That rose but a forgotten token

With marriage would come commitment
The steadfast everlasting kind
One life lived by two
Filled with love that blinds

But seasons are on the verge of change
I'm filled only with fear
I wither away in a forgotten place
As my beauty draws to a near

Has my story taught you a thing?
One mustn't pluck a rose
I admit that we are hard to resist
But eternal love is what follows

And be careful not to strike a thorn
Because I draw more than blood
I poison the senses
Leaving you with only feelings of love

Author's Note

Photo Credit:http://browse.deviantart.com/?q=rose&order=9&offset=24&offset=72#/d36m1i8

It''s taken me awhile to get this one right, I would say about a year or more. I think that it reads very well, but it could probably still use some more work.

Photo Credit: http://browse.deviantart.com/?qh=§ion=&q=rose#/d27phhe

Reviews

[f**k you]

Golly. Very, very pure, and lovely. I honestly had to read it a few times to understand the flow, but the message is quite beautiful. There are several things I want to point out, and they're really technical, sorry lol. First off, in the first stanza, I really don't think that "tantalizing" rhymes well with "me". It's an excellent phrase, but I didn't even know it was supposed to rhyme until I read on. Third stanza, I don't think you need "you got". It would flow nicer without it, just reading "Of that single idea in your head." Lastly, “speech-less” is one word; “speechless”. Other than that, the imagery was just…really nice. I don’t know how to describe it, the whole piece is very dream-like. I don’t want to be one of those people who simply say like, “oh durr, it’s so deep” and that’s it, but it was…really deep. It’s like it was layered; an obvious story on the surface, but beneath it is laced with very metaphoric phrases. Once I understood that, I really enjoyed it, Sarah. Keep it up :)

-nicole-was-here-

[Comlette]

This is deffinatley one of my absolute favorites. The message was clear and deep, and the flow was brilliantly smooth. Grammar and spelling doesnt matter to me personally, since mine sucks hah, but i didnt see any problems with grammar or anything like that. fantastic job please keep writing.