Useless, Broken, Nothing

To be human, you are able to feel emotions. But even a person may lose all their emotions due to someone or something. Have you ever felt this way?

Useless,
Completely and utterly useless.
I drown in the false truths of my abuser's words,
Dragged down by her continuous utterances of the word and its counterparts.
Her continuous degradations will forever haunt me,
Blackening my childhood until the day I pass into Lady Death's care.

Broken,
Shattered and scattered in the wind.
I attempt to mend my body and mind back together,
Just enough to fool my loved ones with a mask of false happiness.
I continue my masquerading and sway them with false emotions,
Hiding the fact that my emotions were slowly starting to fade away.

Nothing,
Devoid of anything and blank.
I no longer felt anything anymore,
My mask of lies has become an important part of my life.
I reject the attempts of those around me,
So used to being the marionette to the clown's mask.

Dead,
My heart and soul slowly died.
I became a living doll for my lies,
Obeying the whims of long lasting lies.
My lies, my puppeteer, controls my binding strings,
Using my empty shell to entertain the thought of true life.

Bound,
Chains of iron and steel bind me to this shell.
I am eternally stuck in my never ending cycle,
Living and dying before starting all over again and again.
Can anyone save me from this torture,
From this eternally pain inducing cycle from Hell?

Author's Note

As dark as I may sound, I wrote this poem about how I was during my childhood and until now. When I was younger, my step cousins and my friends would think bullying me was fun. During that time I had lost all of my emotions and masked it perfectly. A little too perfectly as I became accustomed to faking how I felt and being empty.

Reviews

[Mark Anthony Games (Hum..]

Review for Change the World Comp,

How has this had no reviews, what is wrong with your fellow writers cafe members, SHAME ON YOU!!!!. This is truly magnificent, bursting with honesty, reality, truth, power, genuinity, emotion and meaning. Very Very Very well done. I am able to completely relate, I birthed so many personalities that I had deal out to suit the observer. Eventually though I lost the ability to tell which me was real and suffered a mental break down. The curtain fell and suddenly the actor was exposed, no one knew me and I was expelled by family and 'friends'. I have written many pieces just like this. Wonderful, simply wonderful, WRITERS CAFE MEMBERS SHAME ON YOU< SHAME ON YOU!!!! the other 52 views of this work, SHAME ON YOU!!!

[Alice Walker]

All I can say right now is thank you for the praise you have given my poem.

[Mark Anthony Games (Human Voice)]

73 views now that's an additional 21 people with absolutely no respect for talent. COMMENT ON THIS GENIUS PEOPLE DAMNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

[laoiseaine79]

Great piece of work. I really enjoyed reading this and what makes it so special is that so many people can relate to it. Fantastic

[Carnation]

Grievance and Sorrow Group

Lovely poem,
It was very heartfelt and saddening, I'm glad you posted it on this group. Thanks you for expressing your emotions. Even if they were from when you were a child.

[Alice Walker]

You're welcome, but thank you though for bothering to read it.

[ganga ramesh]

it is dark and i can understand how you must have felt.....i respect this work:)

[Alice Walker]

Merci beaucoup. All I can say to you is thank you very much.

[Red Brick Keshner]

Actually, not as dark as it is realistic & unapologetic of genuine feeling. Written in straightforward language which is adept in the nuances of rhetoric. Not gushy or maudlin as most writing is of this theme & personal reality. But provided with enough emotion to allow a human connection and communion of thought & sensibility. I too have had my day with bullies & have not ventured in articulating my own experiences & feelings. Thank you for sharing.