Who Are You When I'm Not Looking?

Questions haunt my mind all the time. Questions I can never ask. Questions I need answers to before I can find my peace...

Why you, why me; why now?

It's the one question I can't ask, but the one I need to ask most

The one we need to talk about, before we can even think of progressing.

Yet I know the rules, I know this game; it is one I have played before.

Is it taming the big bad wolf?

Is it seeing the best in you?

Is it my curse, my punishment for the f***s and mess Ups?

Do I really see what I see; are you really the nice guy who made one mistake?

Are you all they say you are, was it one drunken; provoked outburst?

What should I believe, when the truth is the one thing you may not be able to give me?

If I was brave, if I could not care what the outcome was; I would ask.

I would say it, approach you with those questions.

But I am too unsure.

Too afraid of failing. Of the fall out.

Yet the one thing I am not is afraid of the answer.

Maybe it is because I have already fallen, or maybe it is because I believe the truth - once and only once?

Once pushed, are we not all capable of great acts?  

Author's Note

Picture stock called Casanova by Angelus Knight from deviantART

Reviews

[mandy]

that describes feelings i have had so very well. the wanting to ask for the truth,,,but afraid of the fallout. i have been there, knowing i should keep my silence, but spoken anyway. then have to get past that..your poem is deep and well written.

[Nicky Sarti]

Aww, thanks so much hunny.
I still dunno where I stand with him, and I really dunno if I ever will.