A Grace Within The Furnace

Nightime coping methods

I lay within a fired mold

sweltering is the night

inside my humble room

brought on by summer.

Reciprocating pressure

gently sweeping sheet

with air-cooled fingers 

beneath my exhaustion

Therein lies my comfort

not by ebbing heat wave

but by feeling tucked-in

when I know, I am alone

With arms outstretched

softness calls back at me

not living tones of flesh

flannel and foam caress

Still each time I overturn

like a feast upon the spit

my loneliness is pacified

upon dreams I lay adrift  

  

Reviews

[Kristin Lee]

Your words co-mingle passion and sadness quite beautifully. The visual image of the fireplace and the actual words "air-cooled" help facilitate this oxymoron, amongst others. It's a constant dance of hot and cold. Very nicely done. One that anyone who has ever had to get through the night alone can surely relate to.

[Astro]

Thanks Kristin, that's really what this one was about, although the seemingly oxymoronic symbols of the furnace and cool air were just two forces battling in my bedroom as I tried to exist within their grips, fighting the one and seeking the other. But more pressing was the loneliness for sure, the fan only made it a little bearable. ;)

[Judas Hammer]

Made me sweat. Beautiful way with words my friend, Kudos!

[Astro]

Thanks again J, the nights are definitely hot on those lonely summer nights.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Therein lies my comfort
not by ebbing heat wave
but by feeling tucked-in
when I know, I am alone -- such bittersweet lines...so powerful.

But you are not alone...you have the creative mind of a poet, and I am sure that somewhere in the world of dreams, people such as you and me, and all the other creative minds out there, frolick together--even if we don't remember. I feel this strongly...because I have lived this.

Fantastic imagery, great flow and form, and I really enjoyed the concept. You are an artist...

[Astro]

"even if we don't remember." Well at least now I know how I got that mark on my neck. You give me strength by complimenting me so. I'm very happy that you enjoyed this one as much as you have. Thanks Sarah. :D

[Dana Alsamsam]

night time loneliness is the worst kind. so often i have wish that my unicorn pillow pet would be a person to hold not an extremely fabulous stuffed animal. you really amplified the pain in these lines:

"With arms outstretched
softness calls back at me
not living tones of flesh
flannel and foam caress"

i also really enjoyed the structure. the deliberate uniformity gives it a chant-like feel. it's routine. it's regular. this happens every night. i can totally relate about the heat, too. my bedroom walls are black and my family likes to save money on air conditioning hahaha. great work here!

[Astro]

Thanks Dana, here's to transforming unicorns and dreams that save loneliness from the heat of a summer nights desires.

[Troy Henson]

How well you have done with this one to match each line almost perfectly in length. This put forth a nice neat flow that made the piece very easy to read. Well done.

Therein lies my comfort
not by ebbing heat wave
but by feeling tucked-in
when I know, I am alone

This stanza i can relate too.....that feeling of lonelyness and a wanting for warmth.

Nice one Astro
Regards
Troy

[Astro]

Thank goodness for the breeze of my fan at night, and by your kind words in this review. Thank you Troy.

[Troy Henson]

Any time my friend:)

[Vile]

Astounding word choice in this dude. That last stanza is one to puzzle over:

"Still each time I overturn
like a feast upon the spit
my loneliness is pacified
upon dreams I lay adrift"

I love how that is written, it is vey smooth and just flows so effortlessly. You got your self a talent with words my friend.

[Astro]

Thank you very much Vile, that is a great compliment that I will always cherish.