Seamus and Norman's Road Trip

A travel story for children

Seamus & Norman’s Road Trip

Seamus Monkey woke up early that morning and sat bolt upright in bed.  It was today!  The race he was going to see was today!  He couldn’t wait!  Fast cars, lots of noise! Revving engines, really cool motors, deep fried jelly babies!

He threw on his favourite brown cardigan and ran down the stairs.

“Norman!  Norman, get the wheels ready, the race is today!”  He yelled to his fellow Monkey.

Norman was nowhere to be seen but Seamus could hear him hammering away in the garage.  He grabbed a couple of bananas and went out to him.

Norman was in the garage working on something involving a computer, a mobile phone and a compass.  All of which was held together by bits of wire.

“Ay-up Seamus, grab the end of this bit of wire”  Said Norman throwing him the end of the wire.

“Rightio, anyway I was saying the r- AAArrrggghh!” A small electric charge zapped Seamus’ fingers.

“What the flippin’ eck you doing?”  He yelled.  Norman was tapping away on the computer and waving the mobile phone around.

“Sorry mate, I think I got it fixed now.” He shook the phone and put his ear to it.  “Yeah that’s on now.  Seamus my friend behold the latest technology, the Satellite Navigation Handset, or as I call in, The Normnorm.”  He looked very pleased with himself.

“Hang on, you can buy them in the supermarkets for a hundred quid can’t you?” Said Seamus.

“Yeah but this one is better.” Said Norman, grinning like a nutcase.

“Why?”

“Because.. It will tell you anywhere you want to go anywhere in the world.  I invented it.  Anyway grab your kit and lets go.  Is that banana for me?”

“What?  Oh yeah it is, right then matey lets get this show on the road!”

How were they getting there, I hear you ask.  Well at this point we have get to meet their transport.

Seamus and Norman owned a  Campervan called the Big Egg.  All Campervans should have a name.  This one was bright white with a yellow roof, like a big fried egg.  You could pop the roof up and sleep in it.  There was also a small oven and a fridge in the back, and there were tables and chairs to sit on. Up front was the driver’s chair and the passengers chair.  Norman strapped his new machine to the steering wheel with sell tape and glue.

“Rightio… and off we GO!”

Seamus and Norman were on their way to the race!  Last time they had to go somewhere Norman was reading the map and Seamus was driving.  The trouble was that Norman was holding the map upside down and they ended up miles away from where they were supposed to be going.  They had a big row about it and Norman came up with this machine to prevent any problems this time.

As Norman drove, the machine called out the directions.

“LEFT TURN AHEAD.” Okeydokey, no sweat.  Seamus sat back in the passenger seat and put some music on, he could relax all the way to the race.  The race was called Formula 1, it is when the fastest cars and come from all over the world to race and see who is really the fastest.  It was noisy and exciting, it was brilliant.

“RIGHT TURN AHEAD”  Rightio, thought Norman,  taking a right turn.  Suddenly the road was rather… bumpy.  He looked down and saw that they were in the middle of a field of cows.  One walked up to the Big Egg and gave a big Mooo

Seamus was woken up by the bumps and opened his eyes to see a big cow staring him in the face through the window.  Norman was pressing buttons on the Normnorm and muttering to himself.  The Big Egg was stuck fast in the mud. Doh!

“Ok big lugs, how are you gonna get us out of this one?”  Asked Seamus.

“Minor technical difficulty lad, I’ll get it sorted, you just leave it to me.”  He took a screw driver out of his pocket and poked the Normnorm with it a couple of times.  “That’s fixed it, now you get out and push.”

“EH?” Seamus couldn’t believe his bad luck

“Get out and push, mate, I need to stay here and steer.”  There was no arguing with Norman’s logic.

With a sigh Seamus got out, went round the back and began pushing with all his might.  Norman revved the engine and sprayed mud and soil from the tyres.  All over Seamus!

“That’s it lad, nearly there, push, push, push!”

“I am you daft monkey!”  Yelled Seamus, swallowing a mouthful of dirt for his troubles.  Suddenly from behind him came a deep loud MOOoooooooooo!!! That seemed to shake the earth.  A big bull with horns like spears was staring right at them.  First it scraped it’s foot in the dirt, then it started to walk towards them.. And they it started to charge!

“Norman get that thing moving!” Yelled Seamus, pushing with all his monkey strength.  The Big Egg began to heave and shudder, and then finally began to move, slowly at first then faster and faster.

“That’s it, now come on!” Norman said, trying to steer towards the way out.  Seamus ran as fast as he could to reach the open side door.  Nearly there, he huffed and puffed.. And with a big bound grabbed the door and pulled himself in.  The Bull gave another loud MOOoooo and tried to charge the back of the Campervan.  But Norman was back on the road now and put his foot down on the pedal.

“Faster, Norm, faster!”  Cried Seamus, throwing pots, pans, anything he could get his hands out the window at the Bull.

It gave the Campervan a nudge, making it zigzag across the road.  Norman floored the pedal and soon they left the bull in the distance.  Phew!

After a stop for a banana and some coconut milk they were back on the road.

“Come on Norman, we’ve got to be there in half an hour.”  Seamus looked at his watch, nervously.

“Don’t worry lad, we’ll make it.”  Said Norman.

“PLEASE TAKE THE NEXT RIGHT” Said the Normnorm.  Norman turned right.

“TAKE THE NEXT LEFT, RIGHT?” Eh?

“STRAIGHT ON AT THE LEFT ROUNDABOUT.” You what?

“Norman, you see that train over there?”  Seamus asked.

“Yeah why?”

“You see the way it’s coming right towards us?”

“Aye.”

“And have you noticed the road has gone all bumpy?”

“I had, aye.”

“Well that’s because.. WE’RE ON A FLIPPIN’ RAILWAY TRACK!!”

Norman gulped with fear.  “Ooh ’eck, Seamus, mate what do we do now?”

Seamus had to think for a second.  “Reverse lad, go back!” And he climbed into the back of the van to see the way back.

Norman braked hard, sending cupboards open and shelves flying everywhere in the back.  He put the Big Egg in reverse and stood on the pedal.  The van shuddered and just kept ahead of the looming train.  Seamus pulled himself out of the pile of junk in the back and pressed his face against the rear window.

“Right, get ready to turn right lad, the road’s coming up.  Get ready.. Get set.. Ok turn it!”

Norman turned the wheel while standing on the brake.  The Big Egg did a turn and regained it’s way onto the road, missing the train by inches.  It thundered past the two rather shaky monkeys until it was all quiet again.

“Norman?”  Seamus re-appeared, covered in milk, banana skins and dirt.

“Yes, mate?”

“I think I will do the driving from now on!”

Half an hour on the road passed.  Faster and faster they went, Seamus gripping the wheel, his foot on the pedal, he wasn’t missing the race for anything.

“STRAIGHT AHEAD AND THEN LEFT.” Said the Normnorm.

“Ok then.  Seamus brought the Big Egg into a screaming turn and onto a new road.  Hmm, this road was interesting.  There were lots of signs about, some piles of tyres and lots of other cars.  The other cars were going jolly fast indeed.  

“Norm, lad, better wake up.”

Norman stirred slightly.  “Aye lad, are we there yet?”

“We’re there alright mate.  In fact I think.. WERE IN THE RACE!!”

“You WHAT?!”  Norman sat bolt upright, hitting his head on the roof.

“Quick!  What do I do?”  Seamus, saw two cars coming up in the rear view mirror.

“Don’t let them pass, move over to the right.  Now floor the pedal and go left.”

The Big Egg weaved left and right between cars, it’s over worked engine spewing smoke.

“Right, now go left where that man is waving a flag.”

Seamus turned the wheel, just missing the man with the flag.  The road took them down to a little garage, and there they screeched to a stop.  From out of nowhere people came over to the Big Egg.  Four of them changed the tyres at the same time, one filled up the petrol and one wiped the window clean.  Then a man waved a green flag and they pushed them off again, back into the race.

They shot past a man holding up a board with a number 2 on it.  This meant they were in second place, after somebody else.  It was a sleek red car just ahead.  This must be Max Von Sourkraut, the world champion.  He was a bit German and very good at driving.  They could hardly keep up with him.  Left and right they weaved, around bends and over humps.  Seamus gripped the wheel and turned it from side to side.

The final lap came up, the last time to go round the track before the end.  Whoever finished first would be the winner.

“It’s no good, Norman, we can’t keep up with him.”

“Yes we can mate, here, let me take the wheel.”

“What, right now?”

“Aye, and get ready for a surprise.”

The two monkeys both gripped the wheel, with one hand and one foot, trying to swap places.  When they had done that, wobbling from side to side as they did so, Norman pulled out a flying helmet and goggles and put them on.

“Right Seamus, mate, you ready?”

“Aye, ready for what?” Seamus replied, frantically trying to put his seatbelt on.

Norman opened a small door on the main controls and pushed the green button.  On the back of the Big Egg a panel slid up to reveal two rocket boosters.

“Get set…. “ Norman pressed a big red button.

Wooooosssshhhhhhhhh!!  The Big Egg shot forward like a rocket throwing Seamus back into the mess at the rear of the van.  Norman was hanging on to the steering wheel while his legs flailed behind.  The controls flashed red lights, dials and speedometers went round and round till the needle shot out the window.

The Big Egg tore up the road ahead of it, bearing down on the little red car ahead.

Von Sourkraut checked his rear view mirror to see a white camper van coming up fast behind him.  Which side would it take, left or right?

“What side shall we take, Seamus, left or right?”

“TAKE THE RIGHT SIDE” Said the Normnorm.

“Ok then..” Norman gritted his teeth and went for it.

The came up on the right side of Von Sourkraut, Seamus pulled a silly face as they passed him, then offered him a banana.

The Big Egg took the lead, and the finishing line came up.  By now bits were starting to fall off it.  The rear bumper first, then the nuts and bolts.  Could they do it?

Could they? Nearly there….

The Big Egg shook, coughed and crunched gears.

Three.. Two..

Von Sourkraut was right behind them, dodging flying metal.

One..

THEY DID IT!!!

“Yaaaaaayyy!!” Yelled the Monkeys together, slowly bringing the smoking Big Egg to a halt, still with bits dropping off it.

Norman pulled his flying goggles up, and finally managed to stand.  He was still holding the steering wheel, as it had just come off in his hand.

Seamus opened the side door to get out and it fell straight off.  Around the Big Egg people came to cheer and shake their hands.

Some guy even came up and presented them with a big golden trophy.  They were invited up and stood on a big step to wave to everybody.  They could see themselves on a big screen.

After a big party and more coconut milk than their bellies could hold it was time to set off home.  Everybody else had gone home by then so they began to push the Big Egg down the long road back, with Normnorm still giving instructions all the way.

“TURN LEFT.  KEEP PUSHING YOU FAT MONKEYS.”

“Norman?”

“Aye.”  Puffed the other Monkey

“That thing is going in the bin!”


The End  

Reviews

[Adela Muresan]

Neat, but a bit cruel.
I like this a lot for its humoristic character, and its realism.

*****Story.

A.M.