Holy

Life's path can often feel unholy,
Twisted turns and bumps in the road,
I feel lost and unmotivated,
Longing for an altar to lighten my load.

But I know God's love is my foundation,
A powerful and unyielding grace,
Even when I feel unholy and broken,
I know His love will never be misplaced.

Life cannot stay the same forever,
And when I call out, God hears my cry,
He sends help like a shooting star,
And my blessings will soon be nigh.

Though storms may cloud my way,
And tears may fall like rain,
I know that God will wipe them clean,
And turn my pain into gain.

Sometimes I lose my faith,
Blinded by the world's noise,
But I know that God will mend my pieces,
And guide me with His voice.

With the Holy Spirit as my compass,
And angels by my side,
I know that life will never be stale,
And blessings will always abide.
© 13 hours ago, Hiroshi Masters hope • spiritual • society • christian

Reviews

[Sarah]

I love the assertive tone that you haven employed here. Combined with the consistent rhyme scheme it makes for a powerful statement. The quatrain stanzas make for a very balanced effect - as well as confident. A beautiful message too. A couple things to think about though:
1. the "shooting star" simile seems quite childlike and is quite overused. Maybe re-think but still keep that celestial comparison
2. the part about losing your faith - maybe reword so that it appears that the 'noise of the world' is the thief of faith rather than you just losing it, or perhaps not losing it completely but no longer prioritising it (having the noise of the world in sight rather than the future idyll of paradise)

amazing poem!!!!