I don't know why...

I don't know why...

A Poem by Neytri
"

The first poem I wrote

"
I don't know why I think
May be you are
The best gift of God
For me to take care.

You say you love me
But sometimes I fear
Will this world accept us
In the way we are?

And if not, then
What is it to be done
To make them believe-
For each other we are?

But yes I know
A day will come
When we would be one
And the world with us.

Your sweet visage in my heart,
Will forever stay
My life is yours
That's why I say.

You are the one
With whom I dream
To stay forever
Forever and ever.

Forever I'll be yours
And you be mine forever
Till the last breath of our life
And even ever after.

I don't know why I think
May be you are
The best gift of God
For me to take care...

© 2016 Neytri


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Reviews

The person must be very lucky in whose name the poem is dedicated...
Anyways loved the poem..

Posted 8 Years Ago


Neytri

8 Years Ago

Did you mean lucky? Actually its me who's lucky rather.... Thank you for reviewing :)
Azriel

8 Years Ago

Hmmm... Thanks for correcting me tough. I didn't see that. Well I hope you be lucky forever... :)
Neytri

8 Years Ago

:) I believe I'll be.
A freshness and simplicity in this heartfelt poem.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Neytri

8 Years Ago

Thank you for reviewing
You're a deep thinker to write such a beautiful poem at such a young age. You have a talent that I'm sure will develop and flourish. This poem stirs the emotions. You mentioned previously that you don't know who you are, well I think you are a writer and a poet, so be happy and keep writing.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Neytri

8 Years Ago

Thank you Sir.
Amazing it is, dear Neytri, that your first poem is a little masterpiece of mind, heart, and soul feelings combining to create such a poetic voice most all of us can relate to in very deeply understood ways.
Such a delight it is to know your spirit entwines with ours in the ideal of eternal love.
A most moving, excellently-writ poem, whether your first or your hundredth!
You've touched and stirred my senses, dear poetess … hugs to you, Neytri! ⁓ Richard

Posted 8 Years Ago


Richard🖌

8 Years Ago

Why, of course!
Neytri

8 Years Ago

Thank you for encouraging me to write more.
And yes, hugs to you too... :)
Richard🖌

8 Years Ago

Mmm ... : )
Sweet and kind words for the emotion of love.
"Forever I'll be yours
And you be mine forever
Till the last breath of our life
And even ever after. "
Love should be forever like the words above. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry,
Coyote

Posted 8 Years Ago


Neytri

8 Years Ago

Thanks a lot
Coyote Poetry

8 Years Ago

You are welcome.
Emotive and well framed piece!
Sometimes people do not come in our lives to stay but to make us move...
Raw feelings!
Overall a good poem.

PS: in the last three stanzas I feel the word 'forever' is overused a bit. Its repetition is distracting and disturbing the otherwise smooth rhythm.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Neytri

8 Years Ago

Thank you Jyoti..
Jyoti_Ablaze

8 Years Ago

You are welcome.
Beautifully written. Keep writing more. :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Neytri

8 Years Ago

Thank you.. and I'll keep writing...

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Added on January 14, 2016
Last Updated on January 14, 2016

Author

Neytri
Neytri

Guwahati, New Guwahati, India



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