Getting Out of Here

You tell me

Getting Out of Here

 

Feeling old and out of touch

 Well past my sell by date

 

You don’t have to tell me

How to cut and paste my love and hate

 

I recall how you used to come and go

like mist and snow

Like swallows, comets and rainbows

 

But then

 

I always knew your love

Was chilled as perma frost and more bitter sweet than those sugar coated pills you used to ply

 

Even more disturbing than those fingerprints

You once left on my windowsill to dry

 

What could have been more incriminating than the DNA you chose to place at the scene of your own overkill  

?

 

Hell that’s it Babe as soon as I’m free I’m getting out of here

…

 

Author's Note

Sometimes my imagination gets the better of me & then, well anything can happen, literally speaking, that is..................N

Reviews

[Chris Shaw]

A case methinks of almost airing the dirty laundry in public and expertly done. Cuts to the core. An oldie out for an airing, and I was pleased I read your author's notes. I would imagine many would envy your ability to deliver a bullet. Memorable lines and only one measly review in four years. Pleased I put my mark on this.

Chris

[Neville]

I am a bad boy but have a good imagination.. thank you. I am too.

Neville

[Chris Shaw]

You are a bad boy and you do have a good imagination. I hope this time round you get the visits you deserve :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

'chilled as perma frost' - funny how 'love' leaves its marks this way... the narrator here seems like he was always looking for a way out ;)
Some very interesting lines in this one. And those fingerprints gave me a kind of creepy impression :x
Enjoyed thinking over this one and the imagery it created. :)

[Neville]

Glad ya found me :)

[Einstein Noodle]

i read the title and said to me self ..oh no ... Neville has had enough ... no more coffee at the Cafe' ... opening couplets are so terribly relatable to me ..out of date ...cut and paste .. my kids took forever to convince me to get a computer ... then another forever to join them on MySpace .. and when I did .. they all moved to FB ... and yes .. another forever for me to go there ... of course .. they all left once again to twitter, tweet and twidle or whatever it is they do now ... your poem about love and break free/break up can be about so many other things ... i almost think it is about seeing one's ideas left at the scene of another's crime ... hmmmmmmm the switch to triplets (is that what its called?) also switches from concrete to more poetic lift of mist, snow, swallows, comets and rainbows ... and a dramatic pause with expectation "but then" ;) i love it Neville ... an oldie, i see, but constructed with strength and hooks .. and complete story .. with all the evidence stacked .. i somehow still do not believe the closing line :)
E.

[Neville]

That closing line was a red herring anyway.. maybe.. but thank you ever so Gene for sticking with me through thick n thin...... N :)

[Einstein Noodle]

:) .................

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Neville... your poetry is like an energizing bunny battery...
so many ideas... but my favorite is "I recall how you used to come and go
like mist and snow.... Like swallows, comets and rainbows". truly, Pat

[Neville]

I like to think I know what you mean Pat and I thank you for it..... bless ya and true my friend.... Neville

[Patricia Wedel]

Many poets find writing poetry does give one energy,
as it sets us free to rest and relax... now that it is penned on parchment and placed in memory... we can carry on. You are gifted. truly, Pat

[Neville]

I really am blushing now Pat x

[Patricia Wedel]

Happy to put some color on your cheeks...
truly, Pat

[Neville]

its 34 degrees here and my freckles are each smiling Pat

[Muse]

I love a raw imagination. Now we are getting somewhere... I mean that was the whole point wasn't it?

[Neville]

maybe, I'm not so sure anymore, it was a long time ago when these words were first writ... but I'm gonna thank you anyway.. thank you .. Neville

[Muse]

Like time, thoughts are fleeting. Words too can evolve with meaning...

[Neville]

I might just be falling in love.... thank you :)

[Ken Simm.]

Sometimes when you get to work with that cynic inside you my old friend you work wonders. Which , I know is rather a contradiction.
So you have here. Worked wonders I mean.

[Neville]

Then I thank you kinda kindly Ken... and true.

Neville

[MsJewel]

So many great, memorable lines in this honest and powerful poem. Great rhyme as well, very smooth, not forced. A delight to read you work.

:) Julie

[Neville]

Wow, now doesn't that suggest I am grateful to you Julie, I am indeed.... I particularly appreciate your kind words and general opinion. All Good Things my literary friend, N