Mephone Quest

Is this story about finding a lost phone or is Robert questing after something else? Love perhaps?

Mephone Quest

 

Shhh! Readers, we find Robert fast asleep, a placid sort of twenty-first century fellow who tries his best, but hasn’t had much luck in life and love probably due to his own taciturn personality.  Oh! No need to whisper now, Robert is awakening from a dream that may change his life�"and his love life. Let’s see what’s up with Robert Quinn.

 

               When Robert awoke, he recalled a scene from his dream�"the only scene from his dream in fact.  In it, a white feather floated across his vision and was whisked away in a rotating column of wind. That was it. As he dressed, Robert took the bit of dream as a harbinger of fate, good he hoped that wasn’t abruptly whipped away, and so he decided the revelation required him to share such riveting information. He reached into his pocket for his relatively new Mephone Zee, but with a shock, he found it gone. He slapped his other pockets and found it not on his person. He glanced around to where he usually left it, but he didn’t see it, just the one dead model from 2001 that he didn’t recall on his bookshelf.  Gazing down the row of books, he studied them as if he had seen them for the first time. He paused at an old curled high school picture of Daisy from simpler times. Daisy, a friend or more? He glanced about and noticed his apartment was a mess as if he hadn’t noticed before. He didn’t recall it being a mess, but he sighed and flipped open his laptop. He Googled the significance of a white feather in a dream. Traditionally, he found, that a white feather either meant a new beginning or the onset of travel, and he decided either would suit his fancy.  

               Robert made an effort to retain where he last saw or used his phone. He thought of his friends, coworkers, and acquaintances and wondered if perhaps anyone seemed interested in his phone, but no one specific came to mind. Sitting back down at his laptop, Robert called up Headshot and checked for messages. He scanned his paltry list of acquaintances that held Daisy at the top. He realized that he was never the nucleus in his circle of friends in or outside the cyber environment. That worthless locus belonged to Joe, a hardy, dense, driftwood sort of fellow who floated aimlessly with the flow, being the life of the party, the bad boy that the girls always gravitated to.  While his stomach riled over the possibility of his Mephone’s fate, Robert’s  Headshot page suddenly sprang to life; it was Daisy.

               Robert had known Daisy for most of his young life, and she was his part time girlfriend loyal if no other guy acted interested in her at the time. Daisy’s attention often returned to Joe, and she returned his affections much to Robert’s irk. He cringed imagining the possibilities. Reading her note, Daisy wondered why Robert hadn’t responded to her calls to action. He got excited for a second imagining the type of action she might be referring to but found that wasn’t anywhere close to what she had in mind.

Robert typed in his dilemma and sat there with no response from Daisy for several minutes. He typed in another quick note and was poised to press send when a note popped up from Daisy. She provided a revelation that could contribute importantly to his Mephone Quest, as she coined Robert’s dilemma. The little time Robert had to wait had made him feel increasingly lousy, but he thought it was probably hunger pains. He told Daisy to go ahead and explain her idea. After several minutes of impatient waiting, Robert thought that Daisy must be a miserably slow typist, but she finally returned a note. It was a suggestion, no, more like an invitation to barhop to all the clubs that she listed which included some that Robert recalled he had recently visited but mostly those clubs that Daisy must visit without him. With a hint of hesitation, Robert wrote her okay. She suggested that they’d meet and begin at the corner a few doors from the Third Vine on the Right Club which, ironically, was three doors down from the corner of Third and Vine.  

Struggling up and coasting down San Francisco’s hills, Robert rode his bicycle to the designated rendezvous point and waited�"and waited. With a sigh and glance at his watch, Robert began to wander toward the wine club, when he heard a rattle and screech of brakes. Of course, it was Daisy in her father’s restored 1973 AMC Pacer.  Restored was a matter of perspective for that strange little pregnant pumpkin car though it did have a decent paint job the color of, ironically, a pumpkin. Preoccupied with her phone, she gripped it at the top of the Pacer’s green steering wheel. She swerved the wheel to pull up to the curb, so Robert saw the phone swivel down out of sight and simultaneously Daisy’s head turned aside and then dropped out of sight below the tan vinyl padded dashboard. The pumpkin car’s front wheel struck the curb and bounced up on the sidewalk striking a trash can that flew toward Robert who dove out away from the scattering trash projectiles and unguided pumpkin missile. Unfazed, Daisy jumped out of the larger of the two doors, the driver’s side, and slammed the rattily door still focused on her phone while texting someone. The Pacer backed down off the curb and began backing away down the street. Robert pointed.

“Where’s your car?” An adamant Daisy asked him. He pointed at his bike. She glanced at his finger point. “That’s why I’m late cuz’ I expected you to pick me up,” she snapped. He shrugged off her insinuation taking in Daisy’s appearance for the first time even though he had known her for years.

Heading down to the Third Vine on the Right Club, Robert didn’t notice before that there was a bunch of huge grapes hanging from a pole on the roof which suspiciously looked like basketballs. Looking closer he ascertained that they were indeed basketballs and the purple paint was in the process of peeling off.  They went inside and glanced about and saw no one readily present. Of course, it was ten o’clock in the morning so no one would be working or visiting. A door slammed at the entrance to the so-called wine cellar. A very well dressed, groomed, and fit looking fellow stepped toward them.

“And what business would bring you two here at this hour? You do know that no wine can be served before one PM on a Sunday.”

 Robert, ever doubtful of the outcome of the quest, informed the obviously gay man why they were there.

The other man checked out Robert, saying, “well, I’m always looking for a good time and can fulfill your other needs if you are willing to ditch the broad.” He eyed Daisy with despise.

Robert was caught off guard but Daisy piped up, “Keep your pants on there, pretty boy, Robert is mine.” She looped her arm through Robert’s as she snapped a picture of the wine bar employee. Robert studied her in a new light.

The fellow said, “fine! Have your way,” and backed off with hands raised in surrender. He then turned back to the tasting bar and reaching underneath, lifted up a box and dumped out about twenty phones. Robert cringed with the clicking and cracking the phones made as they scattered on the counter. With a quick glance, Robert discerned there were obviously no state of the art, highly sought after Mephones in the pile.

Moving on with Robert still glowing from Daisy’s statement, the couple made their rounds to the various clubs and bars on the strip. As they strolled along, Robert studied the blue sky and white puffy clouds like he never saw them before while Daisy tagged along staring and fingering her phone. Suddenly, Robert froze and pointed up.

“Daisy, quick! Look, a meteor!”  She didn’t look up as she frantically punched her phone.

“Nothing on Headshot about a meteor. You must be seeing things.”

Robert sighed as they continued down the street to the various clubs that all had their token pile of phones, but Robert’s definitely wasn’t there. They asked around when Daisy said her friend Eileen texted that there was a Mephone smuggling ring and black market, but the information they gleaned from the clubs’ attendees and a local meter maid proved inconsistent.  Robert began to feel foolish realizing that he only went on this wild goose chase because he wanted some quality time with Daisy without her so-called friends present, but she hardly looked at him during the entire ordeal.  His Mephone was in reality a cheap knock off, his ploy amounting to a cheap trick, while he realized that he was a cheapskate, but he was getting some quality time with Daisy even though she hardly glanced away from her own phone. Ah, if he could only separate her from that confounded phone.

His intuition had in the past proved worthless, but it was his franchise, a chance to pursue action in whatever way he felt at this point while involved in his so-called quest.  As they walked together, Daisy chatted away to whoever she had on her phone at the moment, while Robert outlined his options and the actions he must take. He decided his main accent would be to maintain a brave and enduring face during their joint ordeal. He could perhaps depict his actions of the last 24 hours on paper and convince Daisy he knew exactly where his phone disappeared or explain how it was taken forcibly from him by thugs, thieves, or aliens.  At the same time he pondered how he could recoup his lost time with Daisy, monetarily and emotionally and arrange for an intimate coupling interlude with Daisy. 

Robert knew Daisy was an easy girl to channel in the direction he chose considering she was West Coast born and raised and a blonde to boot.  Robert made a vow to himself that Joe would not interfere or harass him this time with Daisy, and if at all possible, he would become number one in the core of their circle�"somehow.  He took a deep breath as the pumpkin colored Pacer rattled by backwards bouncing from curb to curb. Daisy didn’t notice the bouncing car and squealing rubbing tires on the curbs so engrossed she was with her phone.

Readers, space is limited for this story and so we have to apply due alacrity in bringing Robert’s quest to a full circle. Now readers don’t presume the outcome of Robert’s quest before reaching its culmination, so stick with me and see how Robert’s story unfolds. 

After stumbling on the curb, Daisy took a break from her constant chatting and texting much to Robert’s satisfaction. Daisy took Robert’s list, scanned it and added artistic graphic touches to the plans that Robert alluded to. Never great in mathematics, Robert failed to add up all the implications and difficulties Daisy’s amended plan held but was fortunate enough to have great seat-of-the-pants common sense abilities. Suddenly, a screeching of tires were heard from behind and Robert spun around expecting to see the Pacer but instead saw Joe’s beat up pick up careening down the street. Robert glared at Daisy.

“I told him where we were,” Daisy said. “He can help.”

 Joe jumped out the pick up without bothering to park said pickup and went right for Daisy, but Robert stood in the way.

“Daisy told me about you losing your new phone, what a loser! Get out of my way,” Joe said elbowing past Robert.

Joe went on and on about such a loser Robert was until Robert fumed�"at least internally. Externally, he appeared to be taking it like he usually did during confrontations that never went anywhere.  Daisy informed Joe that Robert had a plan but Joe dismissed the plans in his blatant insolent manner, many manners in fact, so Robert just wound up and socked Joe in the jaw. Joe went down like an overlarge sack of potatoes, out cold.  Incredulous, Daisy looked down at Joe for a few seconds.

“He’s got a rock hard head, I’m sure he’ll wake up soon,” Robert said.

Daisy stood there staring into her phone while taking multiple pictures of Joe lying on the sidewalk and then punching the screen to add an extended descriptive narrative. Robert strode two long steps to her, snatched the phone from her hands and threw it against the concrete wall shattering it into a hundred glass, metal, and plastic pieces.  Speechless, she studied the scattering shards for a second settling on the ground before making eye contact with Robert who wore a smug smile.  Robert thought Daisy appeared shocked and/or embarrassed though realized it was the first time she really looked at him. She opened her mouth�"wordless for a moment.

“What’s the matter?” He asked.

“Ummm,” she pointed at the scattered phone pieces.

“What?”

“That, that was your new phone, Robert,” she said low.

“Really?” He said reassessing his action. “Really. Ah okay, but how’d you get into my account?”

Daisy looked a bit pink, a blush Robert never saw on Daisy’s pretty face before.  She stared at her feet. “I, ah, I typed my name in your password block�"by mistake�"and found it was your password.”

“Oh,” was all that Robert could manage.

“You know, you shouldn’t have such an easy password,” she said not looking up. “But, but when I realized what it meant, I had to see you right away.”

“If I’m on the same wavelength, it hasn’t seemed like you knew or cared how I felt about you.”

“I had to tell everyone what I had found out and what it meant.”

Robert wanted to ravish Daisy on the spot.

Joe stirred with a groan. “Ugghhh, you punched me, you loser.” He managed.

“Shut up or I’ll punch you again,” Robert said down at the sitting Joe.

“Yeah, and I’ll punch you for good measure,” Daisy said falling into Robert’s arms. They embraced as Joe got on his feet.

“What’s with the lip lock on this guy, Daisy? Let’s blow this place.”

“You blow this place,” Daisy said and resumed kissing Robert before breaking away to look in his eyes. “You’re not mad�"about your phone?”

“Are you kidding?” Robert said resuming the kiss.

They paused when they heard a screech of tires, a rattle of spare parts, and the thud of a trash can exploding off the front bumper of the careening Pacer. The non-locking steering wheel spun towards them and the pair cowered as the strange little pumpkin car headed straight for them.  Robert and Daisy, still in an embrace backed up against a brick storefront as the menacing orange car arrowed directly towards them, but as they watched in horror, sure that they’d die after finding each other, the Pacer miraculously slowed and stopped with one spongy whitewall tire on the curb.

“Your chariot awaits, my lady,” Robert said. Daisy only smiled and kissed him on the cheek.

And there, readers is the story of Robert’s Mephone Quest and his winning the love of his life.