Electric love

Electric love

A Poem by Moonie
"

~Love is like lightening; it is electric!~

"
Peppermint lips,
Cocoa eyes that could make
even snowflakes melt.
It was 10° outside,
and my palms sweating
from your heat.
Static in the air.
Quarks oscillating.
The crackle of your blue current
lit me up like a christmas tree.
You smiled and asked me about
science
over smoothies...!
I don't know too much, my love.
But if you kiss me,
I can teach you how electricity flows.


© 2018 Moonie


Author's Note

Moonie
Just a scribble to keep the writing going!

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

Really interesting poem. Has a mix of imagery. On the one side, a tactile seduction one can almost taste. "Cocoa eyes" "peppermint lips" ( IF combined w Christmas tree, feels very Christmas-y) but on the other end a bit more abstract w science and the electricity that connects the visceral with the mental. I esp loved quarks oscillating. Cool phrase! And the last line is both playful and witty.

Cool stuff . thoroughly enjoyed it

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Moonie

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much! That was the general idea...i wanted an overall wintery whimsical feel...glad tha.. read more



Reviews

A strongly sensory poem.

"I don't know too much, my love.
But if you kiss me,
I can teach you how electricity flows."

This is my favourite part. Confident and charming. Nice poem.

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Moonie

5 Years Ago

Thank you for reviewing. I appreciate your words!
Lovely depiction of sensual feelings and romance!

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Moonie

5 Years Ago

Thank you so much!
This reminds me of that sort of romance of young sweethearts. The flow of this piece was like electricity. A slow hum of affection between two souls. There was a connection between the two; this was apparent. This was a sweet poem filled with love in each line. Great read.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Moonie

5 Years Ago

Thank you once again! See lol i was away for so long, missed up on so many great reviews. Sorry agai.. read more
oh my goodness...absolutely love this...the quarks over smoothies ... titillating read Fair One! ...sizzling sexuality but classy ... jealous of your work with the metaphor and how it flows throughout .. nice nice nice stuff says i!
E.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Moonie

6 Years Ago

Thanks so much, E!!!
So good to hear from you after such a long gap!
Einstein Noodle

6 Years Ago

i have been taking a break and am just now starting to visit this wonderful Cafe ..glad i did not mi.. read more
I can anticipate the sparks flying here. Electric love. Great imagery and very meaningful in such a short write.

Chris

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Moonie

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much! I am so glad you liked it! ♡
Really interesting poem. Has a mix of imagery. On the one side, a tactile seduction one can almost taste. "Cocoa eyes" "peppermint lips" ( IF combined w Christmas tree, feels very Christmas-y) but on the other end a bit more abstract w science and the electricity that connects the visceral with the mental. I esp loved quarks oscillating. Cool phrase! And the last line is both playful and witty.

Cool stuff . thoroughly enjoyed it

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Moonie

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much! That was the general idea...i wanted an overall wintery whimsical feel...glad tha.. read more
I loved this:) But I always have to add a bit of humor it all:) Was it Santa lol:) Naw seriously I loved the write. It sounded like a romantic snowed in moment with that very love to be.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Moonie

6 Years Ago

Haha no wasn't santa...not the usual one anyway.. ;)
0000000000000000000000000000

6 Years Ago

Smilessssssssssss:)
Sounds like a great pickup line. Did it work?

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Moonie

6 Years Ago

I'd like to think it did..such elaborate poetic pick up lines always do.. :'))
There's certainly a charge that goes on when electricity flows at the right moments, isn't there. :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Moonie

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much, Relic, for this review! Muchly appreciated! ♡
It's an insatiable feeling that runs throughout your body and you can feel the cold void of it when it's gone.those first steps into love is a wonderful thing

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Moonie

6 Years Ago

Thank you for reviewing, and for the beautiful words!

First Page first
Previous Page prev
1
Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

775 Views
13 Reviews
Rating
Added on February 13, 2018
Last Updated on June 25, 2018
Tags: Electricity, love, electric, peppermint, mint, cocoa, romantic, love poem, poetry, poem

Author

Moonie
Moonie

About
If you're a dreamer, come in If you're a dreamer, a wisher, a liar A hope er, a pray-er, a magic bean buyer, If you're a pretender, come sit by my fire For we have some flax-golden tales to spin .. more..

Writing
Dark things Dark things

A Poem by Moonie


August August

A Poem by Moonie



Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


Friends Friends

A Poem by Mrudula Rani