Rehab- Chapter Two

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The rain had stopped. Thank heaven for small blessings. Solace walked up the stoop of her apartment and opened the door on its rusted hinges. The scent of dried urine and something far worst and older hit her nostrils in a rush. Ah home sweet home. The scent was always something she expected, but it was like new when she got a whiff of it every time. She took the steps slowly, avoiding the bottles and old newspapers that the landlord collected. Weird but everyone needs a hobby. The scent starts to die when you get to the third floor. Her apartment was thankfully there, the sixth door from the stairway. By the time she’d gotten to her door she was pooped. The door to the apartment behind her swung open just as she had gotten her key in the lock. She didn’t look over her shoulder to see who it was. She knew it was Ms. Kernel. Ms. Kernel was a thin, settled widow of 73 who loved cats and everything National Geographic. She worked like clock work. It was if the woman had set up a camera over Solace’s door and knew the moment she got there.

"Oh! Solace! Why don’t you come over for dinner tonight darling…I’m making my famous spaghetti and meatball with fresh shredded parmesan cheese. I’ll even throw in a glass of red wine." She was blushing at the idea of dinner. How cute. Solace had turned to listen to the bubbly words of Ms. Kernel and like always she smiled. It was odd. Ms. Kernel was the only person Solace didn’t mind being around. The woman was too optimistic for Solace’s pessimistic mind. She made it seem as if there was too much hope in the world for anything to go wrong. Or maybe it was because despite the fact that he was dead, she referred to her husband, Giorgio every chance she could in the conversation. Dr. Stratson would think the old woman senile and in need of a senor citizen retiring centre. Yeah that too could be the reason. She nodded slowly to Ms. Kernel and watched the woman nearly jumped at her acceptance.

"Oh goodie! I’ll go start dinner. You go in, wash up and come over as soon as you can to help an old broad out in the kitchen." With that she shuffled back into her apartment and shut the door. Solace chuckled and turned her key in the lock.

Her apartment was nothing classy, as the prelude to it would suggest, but it was home. It belonged to her and no one else. She shrugged out of her coat and hung it on the coat rack. Running her fingers through her hair a few times settled the unruly strands. One of the perks to having straight hair, you never have to worry about it much. A few runs of the brush here and there and you were good to go.

The layout was simple in her living room. There was a long couch to the far left of the room with its back to the window. Two love seats sat across from the couch with a small, vanish coffee table in the center, all a deep green. She’d never put flowers on the coffee table like she’d seen many people do. Why? It was a coffee table and that was the only purpose to it and occasionally a comfy foot rest when one of the throw pillows was added. The floor was carpeted from wall to wall with an olive colored carpet with bits of beige swirled patterns in them.

 

A queen sized bed stood in at the far wall in the center of the room. No fancy coverlets or throw pillows adorning it. Just plain white sheets with two pillows encased in red pillow cases. Simple. The drapes to her window were drawn. She normally left them closed because she slept better with less light…if she slept at all.

 

Moments later, she stood before the mirror to the medicine cabinet over her bathroom sink. Looking at her reflection, she felt nothing, just as she always did. Her bangs were nearly in her eyes. She’d have to trim them soon or she wouldn’t be able to see where she was going. Everyone thought that she was already traveling that road anyway; too blinded to make out where she was going. She shrugged at that thought and quirked a smile. After washing her hands, she dried them and flipped her hair over her shoulders.

"Let’s go see what Ms. K is whipping up this evening."

She shut off the bathroom light and left her apartment, making sure the door was locked behind her. She’d lifted her fist to knock on Ms. Kernel’s door, but stopped. She tried the knob and it turned it fully to the right…unlocked. She had warned the elderly woman about leaving her door unlocked even if she was expecting company. There apartments weren’t secured enough to be so flippant about possible intruders. She locked the door behind her and went to the kitchen to find the elderly woman reaching for a box of salt on the top shelf of her cupboard.

"Ms. K let me get that for you." Solace said, running to get to the woman before she tittered and fell. Ms. Kernel turned slowly, a smile already on her wrinkled face, and chuckled joyously at Solace. Honestly, the woman could melt the devil’s heart and show him to the road of retribution with that smile. She stepped aside and thanked Solace as she pulled the salt from the top shelf.

"You are such a sweetheart dear. My darling Giorgio always had to reach the salt from the very top shelf for me…no matter how tall I was. I loved it when he’d sneak up behind me and kiss the nape of my neck as he held me. He’d whisper, ‘Now now my little woman…let you strong husband do the hard work.’ That man…" She was blushing like a sixteen year old girl who’d just gotten kissed for the first time. Solace smiled slowly but the smile, despite the fact that it was genuine, never met her eyes.

"Come dear, I need to add that into the water to boil the spaghetti." She chirped as she took the salt from Solace. Meanwhile, Solace leaned against the counter and watched the woman shuffle her feet over to the stove. Despite her age, Ms. Kernel’s hands were still steady and sure when it came to cooking. Most of her dishes were always Italian, probably taught to her by Giorgio himself. He and Ms. Kernel had met in Italy while she was on vacation. They fell head over heels for each other, she stayed with him in Italy after quitting her job as a secretary of 8 years and soon after married the man. Giorgio was a heart throb according to his pictures. Ms. Kernel had come back home after thirty years of martial bliss. Giorgio had died from cancer after three years of being diagnosed. A sad story, but Ms. Kernel recited it like nothing was wrong, always ending with ‘I’ll see him again soon…’ When she’d moved back, she changed her name back to her maiden name. Solace hadn’t questioned her on this because the woman had said in time she’d tell. Solace was curious but did disrespect her request to wait.

"He’s been visiting me a lot these days, my Giorgio. He was wearing the white tux I bought him for our 16^{th dinner anniversary. Dashing and chivalrous as always."}

"What’s he been saying?" She asked moving to lean on the little island in the middle of the kitchen where Ms. Kernel had begun to chop up some tomatoes.

"He misses me, and he wants me to come home with him…back to Italy." Her words made Solace’s heart skip a beat. Looked like Giorgio wanted to take the wife into the light. Would she be hurt if the elderly lady with the snow-white hair and a smile that could light up the night died on her? She thought about that for second and knew that she would. Ms. Kernel was truly the only person she liked. She swallowed hard and cleared her throat.

"Will you go?" She asked, her voice softer than usual. There was a pause and she could see the woman’s shoulders bunch with tension. Solace didn’t breathe because she didn’t want to risk the feeling that her heart gave her at Ms. Kernel’s words. She didn’t want to remember that feeling either. It was unwelcome and nothing like what she would do.

"Soon dear…but not today." The tension was gone. "You still have a little while yet to deal with this old broad." She chuckled and turned for Solace to see the rosy red of her cheek. Again, she found herself smiling back and she had no problems with it whatsoever.

"Good…because you’re the only person I like; would really suck to loose you." Solace said a she went to the refrigerator and peered inside.

"Nonsense dear. I’m sure there are others whose company you appreciate as much as mine." She said with the same chuckle.

Solace scoffed and closed the refrigerator after grabbing a can of apple juice. She whipped the top and took a slow sip, letting the cold liquid warm up in her mouth a bit before swallowing.

"I’m leaving to go to this institute in a few days. They insist I’m crazy so there shipping me off to the other side of the earth to be cured." She sounded distracted or as if she didn’t really found much importance in what she was saying. Solace knew she was okay, it was everyone else that needed convincing, and sadly they wouldn’t be convinced until she ‘seek’ help. She sighed softly at that thought and took another sip of her drink.

"Now why would they do something like that? You’re perfectly well Solace." Ms. Kernel said, putting her hands akimbo. Solace looked the woman over and smiled again. She was really doing a lot of that lately. But she smiled because Ms. Kernel was being honest. She truly believed all was well with Solace, not like everyone else around her.

Ms. Kernel sighed and shook her head. "How long will you be gone?"

"Don’t know…" Everything had gone silent between the two. All along the kitchen was being filled with the mouth watering aromas of Ms. Kernel’s pot. The thick tomato sauce bubbled in the steep pot; bits of tine and oregano seasoned it to thick bubbly perfection. The meatballs were rolled and ready to be fried and added to the sauce.

"I will miss you Solace. I haven’t had anyone to cook for since my dear Giorgio passed." She chirped up slowly and gave Solace her winning smile. "But if its what you must do, I say go for it. And look at it from the bright side, you get to travel for free."

Solace laughed as the woman wagged her eyebrows at her. She would miss her too. That, Solace wouldn’t dream of denying. She could stay and spear Ms. Kernel the lonely nights…but she felt like that would seem like running, and running would mean they were right…and they weren’t.

That night, long after a wonderful dinner with her only friend, Solace sat in bed writing the last few lines of her journal entry. It was a black thick book that she’d been writing in for years. She would soon need another, but she wasn’t sure she wanted another. She closed the book and placed the pen down with it on the nightstand. The clock glowed its neon red and read 3:19 am. She ignored it because it was useless stressing about how late it was. She hardly slept. Insomnia at its best. It didn’t bother her, though some days she felt rather exhausted. When she finally got some sleep, it was only for an hour or so. As she lye back on her pillows, she looked up at the ceiling and really tried to think of the last night of good sleep she got. Blank. There were no records in her memory of any. Solace always had trouble sleeping but she didn’t let that bother her. She’d make a good vampire…a genuine child of the night. She was sure that was what some people thought of her; pale, never sleeping and hardly ate. Well she was pale because she wasn’t a big fun and in the sun fan. She hardly ate because most of the time she didn’t have an appetite. Why didn’t she sleep?

She rolled to her side and turned off the light. Her bed was comfy enough to invite sleep. The pillows were fluffed and supported her head as if she slept on clouds. The covers were thick and warm enough in any cold weather. So…why didn’t she sleep? She didn’t really care to figure that one out. The room was darker now that the drapes were drawn. Her eyes were open, not really trying to see in the dark, but refusing to close. There was a time when she would lay there with the curtains pulled wide open, but it became very annoying watching the day roll in. To her it meant that she hadn’t gotten a wink of shut-eye. This was unhealthy, but she lived. She’d had enough thoughts on sleep. She would just do what she did every night; lay there and think about everything and nothing, well except for the very murky past. Yeah that wasn’t up for deep thoughts. She’d tired of looking at them from every angle…real tired. So that was not necessary to think on.

She rubbed her palm across the rough surface of her wrists. The skin was rough and rigid there. All were self inflicted, and all were intentional. They were all there for many reasons. Some because she was fed up, some to aggravate people, some simply to get some sleep. She rubbed her palm up her for arms and remembered every scar. She had a moment in her life that she simply cut her arms up so her psychiatrist could truly se what deranged was and not be quick to prejudge. She’d actually had the audacity to call Solace deranged and when Solace had disagreed she pointed in her face and called her crazy. This was before Dr. Stratson. Her name was Dr. Winters. She wasn’t as patient as Stratson was…but Solace had the ability to drive sane people up the wall. There was a little crazy in everyone, you just had to push hard enough or know what buttons to poke at to drag it to the surface. She stretched her arms and her legs and closed her eyes. Eventually the weight of sleep would pull at her awareness to the sounds outside her apartment. Eventually she will yawn and her eyes would feel heavy. Eventually she would snuggle into her pillows and stop moving. Her breathing would become even and deep. She’d get some sleep…eventually.

Reviews

[Calypso]

Very good! I enjoy this chapter very much.

[Tim]

Enjoyed this chapter as much as the first. You have done a good job capturing the emotions Solace. Especially when you write about what is going through her head. If the rest of the chapeters turn out as good as the first two then it will be a great story.