Me

Yes, I'm the Time Thief.  

The Time Thief: dictionary.com results: nothing.  Does that mean I don't exist?  Hopefully not, 'cus if I don't exist then whats the point of me being here?  

Well, there are a few teachers who I would rather forgot I existed too.

Well, what is a Time Thief?  I guess its not exactly your most common thief these days is it?  I mean, you'd think people would know more, especially when you can't leave even a pen on a desk without it getting stolen, let alone your car unlocked... or god forbid you leave your back door open overnight!  You'd wake up to an empty house!  But I guess a Time Thief is something different... or I guess, the Time Thief, 'cus most of us sorta died out, it doesn't make much money, and you really can't sell time.  

But I can steal it.  

Great, now you all think I'm sort of crazy raving lunatic.  I'm not.  At least, I don't think I am.  Which means nothing now that I think about it.  So anyway, if you think I'm crazy you can just put this down now, or move on, or whatever it is you people do with books about crazy people... perhaps you like it.  

Of course in that case I'll have to disappoint you, 'cus I'm sane... or mostly.  Well, I'll let you be the judge of that if you keep reading.  

But I guess this really hasn't answered your question: what is a Time Thief?  Well, to be honest, a Time Thief is an opportunist.  We are--I mean, I am--a person who realizes there are 60 seconds in each minute, 60 minutes in an hour,  24 hours in a day, 7 days in a week, and 52 weeks in a year.  

It also means I realize that there are 6 blocks in a school day, each containing 3,600 seconds.  Now, if you can do the math, that means each block is 1 hour long.  The day is 7 hours long, from 7:30 a.m. until 2:30 p.m...

Oh great there I've done it again, I've gone and convinced the rest of you that I'm crazy, but stick with me for another few sentences please...

So anyway, if any of you are still reading, see we have 5 minutes (thats 300 seconds) between each class, and a 30 minute lunch period somewhere in the mass of 4th block.  

What a Time Thief is: someone who takes advantage of all 420 minutes of the school day. 

See the difference is: most kids just go back to their classes and sit outside the class and wait to come in, or come right in like sheep and wait for the class to start.  Time steals from them.  They lose their lives to the clock and the schedule.  

See a Time Thief learns this first: That at the beginning and at the end of each class the whole room is so distracted that the teacher can't get anything done.  A Time Thief--one who's good at his job can judge when the teacher is paying the least attention, and leave.  

No I'm not saying cut class, though that is stealing time.  But thats like breaking into a jewelry shop in broad daylight unmasked.  Sure you get the vast wealth of an hour of glorious freedom, but you get caught every time.  And then... well a thief that gets caught isn't a thief very long.  

No, what you can do is take an extra minute here or there, at the end of each class--you know, in the hallways, or in the cafeteria, on the mezz, eating, in the confusion at the start of class most teachers wont' know.  A good Time Thief knows how to fix it.  Or be out the door as soon as the teacher says "go" and sees their friends for the ENTIRE 5 minute transition time... that's 300 seconds more than anyone who goes straight to their classes gets.  

Yes, I'm the Time Thief.  I steal seconds, minutes, even hours from the day and make them mine.  

"If you do not ever take time how can you ever expect to have time?"--the Marovingian (The Matrix Reloaded) 

I think this is possibly the best quote in the entire movie.  Thats what I do.  I steal a moment, I seize it.  Make it mine.  Enjoy the moment.  And then move on and away, to the next moment.  That's the only way to enjoy a day.