God Spoke to Me

When I realized that I wasn't the first to suffer. . . my heart opened. . . there's nothing left to say.

I don’t serve you as I ought to, or pray to you as I should
and I often wait for things to go bad
before I thank you for the good.
I never thanked you for delivering me
from my years of degradation
or for nourishing me and delivering me from
the strain and pain of
starvation.

 

I didn’t thank you for my daughter,
I never praised you for my son,
I failed to praise your holy name
for my health and the length of my days...
So now, as you know... I have regret.

I regret that time has passed me by
and now there is none left.
I took for granted the love you’ve given me
and I forgot why Jesus wept.
I always said I’d serve you if you delivered me from my hardship,
but I never did,
I always said I’d serve you if you delivered my from  pain,
but I never did. 
I always said I’d serve you but I’d put it off until tomorrow–
and now tomorrow’s no longer tomorrow
as it’s slipped into today,
and yesterday when I promised “tomorrow”
now seems so far away.

 

On my bended knees, oh God!
I weep, I pine and I pray,
begging your forgiveness and that my sinful heart you’ll purge,
crying for your mercy and your tender blessings though their more than
I deserve.

 

I regret oh Heavenly Father that even as I pray for your forgiveness,
I’ll still slip and trip and return to ways
for which upon my knees I pray...
I humble myself oh God, and I beg and plead of you to listen
to the pain in my words and the sorrow in my heart
and my regret for taking advantage of your love.

 

It was then that you replied to me,
“My son, I’ve always been here, I know you’re not perfect
and that you sin, for to err my son is human.  I’ve been waiting
for you for what seems so long to you, but to me has not been a day.
I’m glad that you finally came around and you found the words to say.
I am Everlasting and I have set the stars in place, so don’t you know that
I see your heart although you try to hide your face?  There’s so much
wickedness and sinfulness corrupting my beautiful earth, but I see the
righteous as well as the sinful and they’ll each get their just desserts.

 

But you my son are special to me,
for I’ve always known your heart, your childhood suffering
and your adult rebellion I truly understand, but I want to tell
you about a child of mine who also knows what it is to suffer;
he came to be a Savior and to heal and cure and end all strife,
but the ones who he was sent to be the Savior for tortured Him
and took His life.

 

So don’t think that pain is a hardship that is known only to you,
for there are others whose suffering has been much worse, but they have
come to repentance too.  As for you most beautiful child of mine,
no one knows patience as I do, I’ve cared for you, I’ve forgiven you,
my arms are open for you too...

 

So come into the presence of the living God, and be washed clean of all your strife.
Drink from the fountain of Everlasting Life, and finally, have no regret...”

 

By: Nathaniel A. Booker, Sr.
'Genius under Construction'

© Nathaniel Booker