Unlovable

I'm Sorry

 

I was young when he left

Spending days waiting for him to come home

Sitting in the window looking for his car

Crying out his name

Waking from nightmare that he never return

He never returned

Abandoned as a little girl

Wondering why he never loved me

Thinking I would never be loved again

I’m not sure I ever have been loved

Not really loved

By any man

They all leave

Or I push them away

Afraid for a moment

That if I don’t push

They will soon leave me anyway

That is the only way I know

I am unlovable

Allow this to be a warning

One I should post on my forehead

Run if you see me coming

I am unlovable

Reviews

[Brianna Brie]

WOW...Mysty, you are hot right now! Every poem I read of yours is awesome. As for me, I totally get it. The one I wrote has a similar message "What Daddy Does Not Say". My father was physically present. If you can call it that he was a workaholic so not really there. Though, I do admire him for his ability to provide for his family. I am rambling. Anyway, emotionally we didn't connect. The scar of not feeling loved by a man is on me...real or imagined. Yes, I have pushed some men away because of my past. Love the ending "run if you see me coming"....ridiculously hilarious to me.

[Wildecat]

I am afraid I would have to disagree, everyone has told me for a long time what a wonderful and kind person you are. I'm glad that I finally was able to read some of your fine poetry.

[Creepy Swine Guy]

I had a similar experience as a child, but oddly, I never had any doubt that my Dad would come home. It didn't matter that I bought him a Christmas gift and still had it almost a year after Christmas. I never had a doubt that my dad would return; and one day he did.

Though I never had doubts, I can certainly empathize with the sadness that you felt. Your words convey that sadness completely and my heart certainly goes out to you.

[Michael X]

I really like this, it has forward emotional motion. nicely written and expressed.

[Kiddx]

Not really loved
By any man
They all leave
Or I push them away
Afraid for a moment
That if I don't push
They will soon leave me anyway

Oh! How i know this feeling all to well, I used to feel this way all the time, until i met the love of my life, this is a heartfelt and emotional write, very well written.

[LadyRouge]

I don't wanna say nice poem. The writing is good, but it is definitly sad ... no one is unloveable, i hope you can believe it in a deep down part of you. You're a fantastic writer. i LOVE your poetry!!! I believe a lot of people do, so some part of you is loveable ... Thats all I'll say, nice job, keep it up!!!

[O!]

This is true psychologically....many girls have this happen to them when their relationship with their father isnt good, minimal or nothing.......u word it very well....yes saddening but the fact that ure aware is positive for u to bring change into how u go about this in the future....

so i think its a powerful write for urself and others who've been and are in the same situation...

ull do fine! i know.

x,
O!

[Silent Kim aka mizmetap..]

Oh I don't believe that's true. Creative minds are never unloved, just not loved with the deep passion we want.
You expressed your words well, full of sadness and pain. There is a longing in this poem, like beging for love. Then finally giving in and say you are unworthy. Brilliant work. I could feel the emotions.

[Lori]

This quite touching. You really know how to move the reader, and it's so brave to put your emotions out there for others. It's heartfelt and never holds back. You should know those are terrific qualities, and just make you more lovable.

[Dani California]

Mysty, please don't put that sign over your head. Those whose fathers (or mothers) left them, are not unlovable, and it isn't their fault -- it isn't your fault. You have nothing to apologize for. This piece brought tears to my eyes. It hurts when a parent leaves us, my father did as well. He actually committed suicide, making certain I would never see him again. I felt as though I did something wrong and that it was my fault, for years. That simply wasn't true.

Don't do this to yourself. If you convince yourself that you push love away, your subconscious mind will cause you to do so. It's only a reality if you make it one.

Try to find love within dear. That's where it begins. You can msg me if you need to talk :) I get this. I lived it and I finally overcame it. I would hate for you to waste as many years as I did traveling that path, when you don't have to! Talk to me..

Hugs, Dani

[jkhatz]

I can fully understand your fear and self-doubt. I had to learn the hard way, too, that love isn't always easy, the hardest being self love. Self loathing and depreciation is far easier but it'll put you in a downward spiral - some don't return.

I've said it before, once you can learn to love yourself and realize that these people didn't leave you because of you, you will finally be at peace while being in love.

Keep in mind that it's our nature to seek what we know. Sounds like you've had a revolving door of men since you were little when your father left. It's a terrible cycle but I feel absolutely certain you have the intelligence and the strength to break it.

Also, don't let something potentially amazing slip through your fingers because of fear. Fear can be terrible, I know, but be strong, be brave and you will have what you need and desire.