Music

A simple poem that follows rhythm and describes music in an accurate tentative way.

A clash of vibration, a battle of sound,
A whirlpool of voices, all limits unbound.
An infinite rhythm, and order of notes,  
A balance of feelings, that won’t rock the boat.
 
Each word after word, and each line after line,
Notes weave through your heart like a meaningful vine.
While a story hides beneath every great phrase,
It’s emitting wonder that lingers always.
 
An excess of language, an immortal life,
A genuine feeling, that comes, not in strife.
A mixture of magic, a sandstorm of rhyme,
Unspeakable beauty, through enduring time.
 

Author's Note

what do you think of the descriptive aspect of the poem? How can i be more thorough in terms of what I'm trying to convey. Which lines/phrases sound cheesy?

Reviews

[StrawberryDream]

This doesn't sound cheesy to me in the slightest.. Which is impressive, because its very hard to keep on the innovative side when talking about music! Great job, I was going to post my favorite parts, but I'm afraid I enjoyed the whole thing thoroughly, and would be copy/pasting the entire thing in my review! :) Love it, can't wait to read more.

[sheerpoetry]

I think this poem is classically written and the last four lines describe the talent you showed in writing it. no lines or phrases sound cheesy to me because sometimes simplicity is just whats needed. keep writing i would love to hear more

[fireblossom]

Your descriptions were varied as music well done. The rhythm was great...easy and compelling.

Clash, battle, whirlpool, order, balance, meaningful vine...all describe types of music or passages in great works etc.

As a musician and music lover I truly appreciated this very good poem.