Optimism

Got really down today, but I'm back up again~ *first draft* sorry if it's crap

I'm feeling content.
Please don't shoot me down.
Flying high,
Caressing clouds;
I'm closer to the sun.

Yeah, I may be blinded,
But now I see the truth.
I feel the wheel
Of the wagon
That will bring it back to you.

My hope is coming nearer.
My dreams, among the stars.
I will sigh
For slipping once,
Having created these bars.

Now, in this air-ship,
I'm chiseling them away.
Steel reveals
My soul again.
I'll wake to a new day.

Author's Note

Oh yeah, I will definitely revise this tomorrow after I get some sleep. It was just my first idea for this feeling I have. I have to stop comparing myself to others and getting discouraged. Not only in writing, but in other things. Now I'm feeling better~

Reviews

[emmajoy]

Best thing about sleeping? Waking up!

There's something about poetry that sets the heart flying and your poetry is no exception. You write with emotion slow-dripping from your pen; no matter what you're feeling, you make sense, wonderful sense.

See how it easy it is to be happy, just knowing that whoever you are, whatever you write, the words 'unique and wonderful' are your middle names. Love these lines: ' Now, in this air-ship, ~ I'm chiseling them away ~ Steel reveals ~ My soul again. ~ I'll wake to a new day. ' ..... there's such hope written there and that makes me smile and smile.

Thank you for sharing

[nostal]

Great write. This could be made into an awesome song.

[anml]

some commas in places that really aren't necessary, though that's just technical, not really important; nor does it take away from meaning. you write well, and get what you want said...said. great job :)