CASUALTIES OF WAR (Pt II)

This is the second last installation of my CASUALTIES OF WAR series. How far would YOU go to protect your country?

*American barracks 1800hrs*

            The blood in his mouth tasted awfully sour- the fragments lodged somewhere in his liver were reacting quickly. Keigo was half dragging, half carrying him through the American barracks, in a demonic rage. From what he could hazily tell, Keigo and what was left of Platoon 856 were pumping as much lead into the stunned Americans as they could. Their leverage wouldn’t last forever. Platoon 856 had to achieve it’s objective quickly: American reinforcements were probably already on their way back to base and Kurosawa was hanging on for dear life… Had it not been for brave Saito Kyuushi, the explosion would’ve definitely taken out Kurosawa and half of the platoon. Keigo promised his delirious captain that should he live through this, he would see to it that the Kyuushi’s were compensated adequately. That eased Taicho’s grief immensely.

            There was screaming everywhere, as precious life was lost. Swaying in and out of consciousness, the Japanese Captain saw just how much behind him his men’s wills were. They fought savagely in the abyss that was enemy camp. Kurosawa’s plan had a minimal precendented percentile of success and each and every one of his men knew that they were probably laying down their lives. Their hearts would claw, plunder and surge forward for their precious captain, until dear life was wrenched from them. Their hearts were in his hands forever: Taicho was their Commander, and it would be honorable to die beside him…for beautiful Mother Japan.

His vision was quickly fading and bullets ricocheted over him in all directions, ghoulish cries of pain abounded the air, mini-explosions resounded distinctly throughout American base. It was pandemonium. Kurosawa cursed himself. He had led his men into a deathtrap. He purposely shut his eyes and prayed hard. Be with us… Blood landed on his face and he opened his eyes. A bullet had struck Keigo straight in the shoulder. “KuTaicho!” The men were screaming, forming tighter ranks around Keigo. A Vice-Captain never cried in agony or exposed any signs of weakness. Keigo returned fire viciously. He was shouting orders at the top of his lungs, mastering the pain. Just as was expected from him. Formations were being changed to defensive. Assault team was reloading as Pistol team held fire. Kurosawa was further encircled by his men, perfectly shielded from the danger around him.

Keigo was suddenly kneeling beside him, shaking him vigorously. “ Taicho!! Hurre Hurre! (Cmon! Cmon!)We are here! Hold on Taicho!”

Kurosawa tried to speak but he couldn’t. His plan required him alive. Kurosawa wouldn’t let himself die yet. He nodded curtly and Keigo understood wholly. Back up into action, Keigo jumped- but Kurosawa had glimpsed it briefly. A tear was in his Vice-Captain’s eye. The overwhelming blanket of desperation had at last a hole of hope. 

                      *

*American Escarpment, some hours earlier*

River Terkana runs along the whole length of the Sun Valley floor, which approximates about a quarter mile. Two escarpments tower over either side of the seasonal river, somewhat in a natural taunt of Terkana. The Sun Valley, usually green with vegetation and scrub during the rainy seasons, was now a semi arid wasteland. The Terkana had run dry a few months ago, and its effect on the shrubbery was being fully felt; shriveled plants now covered the lonesome Valley, up until the escarpments. 

‘Perfect Heaven’ is what the American snipers were calling the escarpments- whoever who had the better vantage point would pick off their antagonists better and easily set the pace of the fight. The American Escarpment was better and beginning assault from the Valley floor was nothing short of suicidal. It was a no brainer, mused Sergeant Ajax, the Japs would utilize the sloppy side of their escarpment and they, the Americans would be ready. They had better ground, more men, the latest and deadliest war technology, and a great Commander. They had more than enough reason to be egotistic today… today they would crush these pestering Japs. 

After losing about two thirds of their men over a span of two months, today was definitely the Japs Last Stand. About 100,000 Japs versus the Almighty 600,000 Americans. Sounded like an ice hockey final headline. And that was about a half of Battalion 199- the rest were deployed somewhere elsewhere miles away, obliterating the last of the Jap rebellion. The South West Japan stronghold would fall under their control by tonight. And tomorrow the rest of it would crumble. The Domino Effect was inescapable.

Down along the escarpment wall, the camouflaged Commander Ronald waited patiently, peering across to the opposite wall through the lens of a Dragunov Sniper rifle. He’d misplaced his binoculars and so he’d improvised. The Corporal he’d snatched it from was shaking beside him, terrified of being unarmed in the midst of a war. The Commander chuckled appreciatively. These Corporals just didn’t come with cahones anymore- you had to breastfeed the backbone into them. Babies.

“Alpha Unit 306. Tango, you’re not going to believe this.” Radioed in Platoon 306’s leader.

But Ronald didn’t need a commentary, he could see it for himself. Clearly.

“All units. Hold your fire until my order.” Ronald radioed back.

Ronald’s mouth was agape. “Cannons on the ready!”

The Japanese were insane.

                      *    

            *Japanese*

This would be a tough phase of Kurosawa’s plan but his men were fully behind him. He knew that the Americans would predict them appearing along the east escarpment- as would any war tactician. They were wrong. The Japanese were sprinting as fast as they could across the Valley floor. This would be termed as suicidal had they not added something completely unheard of. Kurosawa had ensured that between every pair of the 20,000 Junior Corporals, there was a double-layered steel shield available. One shield comfortably covered five men from enemy fire at any given time, and there were ten thousand of them. The Math is simple-they were all covered.. However, this was not what made the shields special. As a last minute improvement, the Japanese Captain deeply imbedded long narrow strips of glass onto each shield’s protective surface. The glass would reflect the sun’s rays and blind the American Snipers for long enough for the Japanese Marksmen to take out as many as they could.

“Their helmets are out of camouflage! Aim for the maroon dots!” Kurosawa shouted, focusing his rifle through a hole in their defensive cover. “Marksmen …CANNONS! Two birds east, along the North Escarpment!” Keigo’s sharp acuity was as timely as usual. “FIRE!!” The Marksmen fired carelessly- they hadn’t perfected on how to fire while moving under the shields. “ Kso!! (D****t!) You want to ashame the earth your fathers toiled for in this foolish manner?!” Keigo scolded his men’s dignity. “AIM…FIRE!!” More shots rang out reverberantly, and this time they were more precise. About fifteen of the American Cannonsmen fell. “RELOAD…FIRE!!!” The Marksmen were acclimatizing rapidly. American rifles were ringing out- they were firing recklessly. More of their Cannonsmen were falling.

Suddenly a large cloud appeared from over the Escarpment. That’s when the earth shook.

 

*American Escarpments*

“Cannons HOLD! ASSAULTS FIRE AT WILL!!” Ronald was hollering angrily, blinking endlessly at the sea of light in the Valley. “KILL EACH AND EVERY ONE OF THESE ASIAN SCUMBAGS!!”  It was completely useless though- the Assaults couldn’t make out a thing. D****t! He hated surprise attacks. The stupid Japs had landed several low blows; their cheap antic had managed to blind and stun Ronald and his men for almost ten complete minutes now, during which he was sure a big fraction of his men were being expertly picked apart. Foolish scumbags. They would pay dearly for every single drop of American blood they spilt. Every drop!

Thankfully an extensive cloud obscured the sun’s rays from the Japanese reflectors. “CANNONS READY!!!!” Ronald shouted before his eyes had readjusted. “FIRE!” He heard less launches than he intended- they were taking out the Cannon Teams! They needed to bombard the Japanese with more fire power- the few Cannons were certainly not going to make enough impact and their Assault rounds were being stopped by what Ronald now understood to be shields. “ASSAULTS HOLD!! GRENADES AND CANNONS ALL!!!! KILL THESE MOTHERF-”

He was cut off by the variety of intense blasts that filled the air at that moment. Ronald’s lunatic laughter managed to pierce through all the dust and smoke to the Valley Floor. He’d kill them all.

 

*Japanese*       

A huge chunk of the lead barrier had been taken out by the myriad of explosions the Americans had initiated. Some of the men at the frontline were dismembered but most were dead. Somehow the Americans were managing to penetrate the top of the shields and plant explosives within the Japanese dead space. Grenades, inferred Kurosawa. He was hoping they would be able to inflict more damage on the Americans, but it was now time to break. “Mole Formation!” Kurosawa simultaneously handed over to his Lieutenants. The Battalion divided instantly into their (2000) separate Platoons and ducked in different directions. May protection reign over your souls…Kurosawa thought, before wrestling his attention back to his handpicked Platoon. The second last phase of his plans had to be initiated.

            The Captain’s (856) Platoon all dived into the dried up gully that was Terkana while the smog was settling. Keigo pulled out a huge, weightless brown sheet from his backpack and threw it around to the other twenty-nine men, who all fell to their stomachs and scrambled underneath it. Kurosawa’s ingenuity was scary and they all felt lucky to be on his side. They would invisibly crawl along the Terkana gully, past the inadvertent Americans with immaculate precaution. Then head for enemy camp from there. All for Mother Japan.

            Explosions on the Valley were surfeit, and they felt Mother Earth tremble as more of their brothers were extinguished by fierce firepower. Platoon 856 graveled along the stony riverbed, fully aware that they carried the weight of an entire nation on their shoulders. They hadn’t been shot at so far, so they concurred that they had indeed gone unnoticed to the American Snipers’ ubiquitous lenses.

There are many sounds that soldiers get used to in a war. Firing of weapons, explosions and blood curdling shrieks of anguish. But the sound of a grenade plopping right in front of them, can cause a nervous breakdown and uncontrollable panic. Panic equals death.

            An American grenade landed just a stone’s throw away from Kurosawa Kageyoshi, who froze. He wasn’t much of a sprinter- he wouldn’t reach it in time, and he couldn’t get up from under the sheet and run back without drawing attention from Sniper fire. He was shell-shocked. Everyone was. They were going to die. Things seemed to slow down to a freeze frame speed as the stunned Platoon watched helplessly as one of their own slithered from under the sheet, to his feet with inhuman agility and launched himself forward. He planted himself onto the grenade, shielding his Platoon just as it exploded. Screams of “Mother Japan” and a cloud of crimson smog were all Saito Kyuushi left behind.        

                                  *

Author's Note

Please be BRUTAL!!!
I felt like the pressure to deliver an equally good part was too much and it might have tainted this piece? True/False?

Reviews

[Alvin L. Kathembe]

'easened' - eased
'His plan required him alive.' - his plan required him to live(?!) even that doesnt quite sound right...maybe 'the plan's success depended on his survival'?
'which approximates about a quarter mile'-approximately a quarter...


O M G...
this is EPIC! i like,i like, i like!
the whole two perspectives thing is really coming off,and now we see clearly who the bad guy is...you've painted such vivid pictures,and describe the clamour of battle so well!reminds me of Tom Clancy...love how you've described complicated war manoevres with such clarity,and eloquence...this is a perfect 2nd part bro, and leves us nicely in suspense...awesome dialogue, great vocab and the plot is very well developed,and i am gushing, so...
no pressure,but -
PART III ASAP!!!

[TheSweet]

Sorry it's taken me a while to get round to this one - it doesn't seem like you've tried too hard, it seems like you were trying to make the story exciting, but you've hit some decent notes different to the first part.

I think this one develops the piece further. It has less of the playing with Japanese to American culture barrier and focuses more on a development. I like the weaving stories better in this, where you go from one to the other and then back - because then you see a development and from both sides. This is preferable to one piece being in two halves, one for each side.

I think it simply could do with another little edit, see what you think you can change to hone your personal style. Also, with writing (it seems not to be very well noted), but generally, with dialogue, no matter how much someone is shouting, you don't use capital letters or more than one exclamation mark. How much they are shouting should be shown, or suggested by the urgency of the writing or the description of the speech. So turn things like '“Cannons HOLD! ASSAULTS FIRE AT WILL!!” Ronald was hollering angrily' should simply be '“Cannons hold! Assalts fire at will!” Ronald angrily yelled'.

As far as the content goes, It's not entirely my place to suggest as it's not my type of story - but I did still read it all, which is a good thing :) So, thanks for sharing!

[emmajoy]

Such a horrifically bloody finish to part II, presumably essential to the plot. Normally I'd not read books with a war themem there are enough real wars to focus on. However, you're a writer with a great sense of story-telling, you've done a fair share of reference work re characters and language, etc. The balance between the two sides, their strategies and thoughts are clearly defined .. your writing flows really well. You've not tainted this piece at all.

[Maureen Mwaniki]

False!i wuldnt fault it on anythng(save for a few errors in sentence construction) i love it!!you describe this war like you were part of it ama u've been to 1?!the japs clearly have alot up their sleeves i like that twist of events its impresive!!more?i'l write a placard and start a protest if you don't!more!more!more!hehe
p:s am secretly rooting for the japs!dont tell anyone! :-P

[Coyote Poetry]

War ain't polite. Always two sides to all stories. Funny part the loser is rarely remembered. The description was very good. I read many battle of war books. Always good to know reason and purpose of each side. I like the movement to the two sides of a battle in your story. A strong ending to a excellent story.
Coyote