Flourescent

Sometimes, we fall in love with peoples vulnerability

Black silhouettes with whiskey in hand,

We are-

the dying flicker,

in these cosmic, sky-ridden lights.

Laughing louder than the fires flames,

we had-

made love to the thought of

infinite, vacant instances.

And for more than a single moment,

I was-

falling in love,

with the fluency of your vocal chords,

and the vulnerability in our veins.

Reviews

[Chris]

Firepits and dancing ...flames
in the night's eyes -
starlight so bright the mind
blinks with tears
each tomorrow's morning.

I've tasted sunrise
in moments that haven't come
and left noseprints behind
on the glass of those that did.

I guess love is what we do
best
between moments of dark and
silly lost smiles
and wishes on falling stars
as footprints fade away.

Chris

[Ally Monique]

wow, beautifully penned! :)
Love is what we do best...I love that
Thank you again!

[Chris]

We try so hard to be understood ...or heard... or noticed... or to stay - hidden. And then we get another to think - and seem surprised that we were able to - touch a mind. Thank you for the "touch".

[Frieda P]

Love is sometimes all too fleeting but nonetheless exciting in the moment...I guess that's where that song Love the one you're with, was thought out...'laughing louder than fire-flames'...brilliant line.

[Ally Monique]

Thanks Frieda P for the thoughtful review :)

[Frieda P]

Pleasure was mine Ally, I muchly enjoy your style. :)

[Ally Monique]

Thank you! I really enjoy your style as well! :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

vulnerability, vacant instances...
timing can be everything...i have had this kind of love.
circumstances dictate....both of us vulnerable..even if it is a love that is not for our own good...and down the line will find itself too soon burned out.

excellent wording here. "the black silhouettes...whisky in hand" again, that vulnerable state.

[Ally Monique]

Thank you Jacob! Your reviews are always so intricate and insightful :)

[willweb]

Another stunning poem Ally. I could feel this as I read. Vulnerable to your words. I liked this alot.

[Ally Monique]

Thank you!! :D

[Jo]

I like your use of form. I love the way you take the outline of a relationship and interlace it with more complex issues to arrive at a neat portrayal of mans' fragility in the face of the universe?

[Ally Monique]

Thank you Jo! :)

[J. K. Beach]

Ally-- this piece feels like stars and fireflies to me... simple and complex, close and distant all at once. The gestalt is so poignant! Well written!

[Ally Monique]

Wow, brilliantly worded! Thank you so much! :)

[Matching Socks]

I think it's that hero complex in some of us.

We want to protect those less vulnerable, if it happens to be a very good looking man with a nice personality then all the better.

Beautiful flow and imagery. : )
Enjoyed this one Ally.

[Ally Monique]

Thank you very much! I think vulnerability is beautiful! Thanks for the review :)

[Writer at last! Sky ~]

Wonderful to read specially the last stanza's

And for more than a single moment,
I was-
falling in love,
with the fluency of your vocal chords,
and the vulnerability in our veins.

[Ally Monique]

Thank you very much! :) Your kind words mean a lot

[Writer at last! Sky ~]

Welcome friend!

[escherflight]

Read the reviews, too. I think the whiskey image works so well as it would pick up a bit of light, hence your flicker, and like you say, gives us more of ourselves and less'
"sky-ridden lights" - interesting image.
I like the adjective 'vacant' in the final line of your second stanza, especially after 'infinite' which, suggests great scope, in relation to your references to the 'cosmic', but then most of space is empty, after all.
fluency and vulnerability - oh the freedom of it.

[Ally Monique]

Thank you very much! Your interpretive analysis is really beautiful and deep! I'm grateful you took the time to read and review my poem! Infinities are lined with vacancy