Rhymes

Rhymes

A Poem by MrsRadke
"

A poem about my failed rhyming.

"
I've learned about you
I had to
It was a necessity
I've heard things about you too
People talk
I know what you are
I know what you're supposed to look like
I know what sounds you make
I also know how to make you speak to me
But, when I bring you out,
I do it with hesitation
I do it with lack of interest
I see others accomplish what I cannot
Half the time, you're forced,
but you're there.
You're not forgotten,
not by them anyway.
I gave you a chance,
but I've given up.
There's no use,
you might as well be dead.
But you're not.
All you are is a trickster.
You speak to me through shattered glass.
While others hear you through sparkling crystals.
I thought you were the only way.
I was wrong
and I've moved on.

© 2010 MrsRadke


Author's Note

MrsRadke
Be mean, be nice. Tell me what I need to work on or what I'm doing fine. Say if it's good or if it's bad. Or don't read it at all, I won't know.

My Review

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Featured Review

There is potential here, but for me, I kind of lost my way in the middle, finding it hard to concentrate. With all the "I" 's it gets a bit monotonous, like a list. try to cut out words like "also," which adds to the list feel more.
But I know what great courage it takes to literally display yourself through your work so kudos to you there! You have potential, and I noticed are a new writer, so I'm sure you have a lot of good things to come. Your writing style will develop and grow, and you'll find a style you're comfortable with. Good luck, and have fun on WC; looking forward to more of your work ;)

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

There is potential here, but for me, I kind of lost my way in the middle, finding it hard to concentrate. With all the "I" 's it gets a bit monotonous, like a list. try to cut out words like "also," which adds to the list feel more.
But I know what great courage it takes to literally display yourself through your work so kudos to you there! You have potential, and I noticed are a new writer, so I'm sure you have a lot of good things to come. Your writing style will develop and grow, and you'll find a style you're comfortable with. Good luck, and have fun on WC; looking forward to more of your work ;)

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on January 10, 2010
Last Updated on January 10, 2010

Author

MrsRadke
MrsRadke

Vancouver, Canada



About
Well, I'm 16 and I like to write. I used to only write short stories, but then I started writing a bit of poetry and I realized that poetry is what I want to do, mostly because it's much easier for me.. more..

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A Poem by MrsRadke