Emotional Suicide

I wrote this for the "cry me a river" contest years ago. Don't even remember how I did.

While the everlasting sleep slips into my bed
These images slowly find their way into my head
For the very last time where in my dreams I can hide
Welcome to my beautiful suicide

Here's to the death of all dreams from days gone past
To all things that will wilt and were never meant to last
When I water them raw with acid rain
They will burn a hole that starts in my brain

And slowly works its way into my heart
To burn what little is left of what's now torn apart
There in cold and empty chamber number two
Is where I kept the hopes and dreams I had for you

Echoes of your name bounce into chamber number one
Where joyous laughter used to live but now is gone
You were once my saving grace and my life raft
But today I found your smile in a photograph

Still protecting you I shielded you
From the rain of tears
By holding you at arms length
As you did to me for years

Never letting me in for fear that it might be real
Afraid,I suppose,that from your heart I might steal
Never again will I allow my love to be shared
I will destroy all signs that say to all I ever dared

In empty fields of wind and ice
That's where my heart now will reside
Welcome to you all
To my emotional suicide

Reviews

[Diamond]

Extra ordinary. Upon reading your description, I was wondering how by writing only for contest, you could evoke this much emotion. No, I understand that this words bled from your heart's wound. Everyone sure has undergone this pain, to different depths. Some say, hold on for dear life...but I think "let go" for "dear life".

[Mr. Lopez]

The contest inspired me to uncork the bottle and let out the poisonous pain it contained inside. You are very much so accurate in your statements. First, the poem appears as it was written. It's never been edited. These emotions are/were real and come from a very deep and dark place. And secondly, my life has only improved without her in it. Thanks for the kind words and review.

[E.G. James]

Great work. I love your word choice. It was a good read.

[aLittlePain]

This is incredibly deep and heartfelt. Leaves quite a bit to ponder. I love the last stanza...Powerful. Fine poetry. R xo

[ern]

Yes you are so amazing and deep!

[MsJewel]

In empty fields of wind and ice
that's where my heart now will reside...
the perfect description of a heart broken and void of the warmth of love. Your poem is well written and heartfelt. Really nice work. Julie

[Mr. Lopez]

Thank you for reading and reviewing. Although I have many favorite writes, this one is somewhat special to me. Thanks again for your kind words.

[MsJewel]

My pleasure

[Mip/John K. Brierley]

Lol, there's a typo. But jokes aside, this poem was a delight to read, and the rhymes you used were awesome.

[Mr. Lopez]

Thank you very much for your review...and your help. I hadn't noticed the typo until you mentioned it.
Peace

[FIN]

Wow. What a brilliant piece, so captivating from start to finish well organized and paced.

Thank you for sharing this with us.

[Mr. Lopez]

Thanks for your review. Believe it or not this was written spontaneously and I posted the original unedited version.thank you for your kind words.

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSh..]

Emotional Suicide, what a beautiful, brilliant manipulation. I started a list. 1) I could slit my wrists on the jagged edge's of all the broken vows I once believed. 2) I could sleep the endless sleep if I swallowed all the wedding rings I accepted. 3) I could go mad if I thought about the one that got away, the one I love still who doesn't love me, simply mad. So short list but dramatic all the same. I can not even come close to what you do here. Mr. Lopez you do this in such a touching, charming, perfectly synical way. I love this piece. Your on point, and to the rhytm of one's heart. Different for everyone but everyone can relate. A perfect Poem that triggers a memory of the love you once knew. I myself am over most of the past, but as you so clearly state here the heart is still broken but beautiful.
Sheer Terror

[Devious13]

omg !!!! bravo bravo , i love it and its powerful its deep and it had my attention from the start to the end. It left me wanting to read on, great piece love the work !!! love to see more !

[Mr. Lopez]

Thank you. This poem was written spontaneously and has never been edited. I wrote it in just a few minutes . It just came pouring out of me. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Valentine]

Death ti your emotions...I think not, this write expresses much emotion. Valentine

[Mr. Lopez]

Yeah, this is an old poem and is a representation of ones reaction to being brutally wounded in the arena of love. But wounds heal,as do hearts . Thank you for stopping by.