Blah, blah, blog...

I've always been convinced that I'd be destroyed in an estrogen explosion.

Monday, June 28, 2004

 It's been a very long weekend... starting with meeting my fiancée at the hospital on Wednesday, staying there until four in the morning to find out she's got a kidney stone, missing work on Thursday, disappointing the kids and cancelling our Disneyland trip on Friday, working on my father's computer on Saturday and spending Sunday depressed out of my skull but working up a nice anxiety attack and a huge case of "dumping syndrome" anyway.

It's my life and right now I'm at work wishing that I had a bottle of whiskey waiting at home.

Instead, I'm blessed to be able to return home to my three girls and I have to remind myself that they're the most important things in my life.

So, in order to escape without the alcohol it's time to come up with...

The Top Ten Reasons Estrogen Is Better Than Alcohol.

10. It kicks your a*s and KEEPS ON KICKING!

9. No jury ever acquitted because of an "alcohol defense."

8. I only feel embarassed at the checkout stand once a month. (think about it)

7. Brawling, cursing, fits of uncontrollable rage, loud music... once a month it's a party!

6. I love you, get away from me, I love you, get away from me... schizophrenia with no cover charge.

5. I'm starting to think the cats are the only ones that actually listen to me.

4. I can't fight off the desire to drink with chocolate.

3. God is a marketing genius because men fall for the packaging every time!

2. Hey, no one ever heard of the bottle behind the man, did they?

and the number one reason that estrogen is better than alcohol is:

1. There are far fewer people attending support groups to get over it.

We do get over it, don't we? Hello? Hello?