Chapter Eight

After Kenny has bonding time with his brother, he runs into his Ex again with news.

A Lover Struggles

      “How’s mom and dad?” Kenny and Malcolm had gone off alone to the Berkeley Hills with a baseball and mitts. Kenny had changed into jeans, a plain colored shirt and that jean jacket he had found while Malcolm had changed his uniform into red track pants and a black windbreaker.  Luckily, they both stumbled upon a deserted diamond field after driving halfway up the hill in silence. They parked on the dirt side of the road overlooking the San Francisco Bay during the clear afternoon. The sun was sparkling in off the ripples of the bay that was littered with sailboats and ferries. Kenny could make out the fog deep on the horizon, lining it like a cottony tube.

      Malcolm shut his door with a little more force than he cared for but he didn’t show it in front of Kenny, who had shivered at the loud slam.

      “You would bring them up. Can’t we just enjoy our time?” The older brother broke off walking toward the field, with Kenny catching up.

      “I can’t ask about our parents?”

      “Maybe you should call them then. Did you ever think of that?”

      When they entered the field, Malcolm noticed a dusty bat toward the outfield and jogged to retrieve it.

      “You don’t have to be an a*s, you know? Honestly, I don’t need this from you right now. I know how to get back home on foot!”

      Malcolm jogged back over hurriedly and kept his brother from leaving, placing his arms on his shoulders.

      “I am not mad with you.”

      Kenny shrugged.

      “Then I don’t get it. Why does asking about mom and dad trouble you?”

      Malcolm sighed, pressed his eyes shut for a moment before looking away into the San Francisco skyline.

      “Do you need any more reason to be upset with them?”

      “What did they say, Malcolm.” A bored tone.

      Met with a groaning sigh.

      “That the gay son would be the one who’d get diseases and I was furious then when they said it. Thought it was the foulest thing I ever heard them say, which of course made them silent and scatter away from me.”

      “And that’s why I don’t call them.” Kenny blinked away the tears and huffed, “Are we playing ball or not?”

      Malcolm wrapped him in a shoulder hug, causing Kenny to reluctantly pat his pat before dropping his arms.

      “What? That hug not good enough for you? Too straight?” Malcolm had a quirky smirk on his face as his younger brother just frowned. Kenny broke from his brother’s hold and walked toward the dusty home plate as he gazed over the sparkling bay and shining San Francisco skyline, the Golden Gate and Bay Bridge kissing in the city.

      “It doesn’t bother me that they are so proud of you and adore Martin.”

      “What are you saying?” Malcolm asked, coming to look out at the clear scene too.

      “That you guys both can have their love and affection, it doesn’t bother me.”

      “You’re not serious, are you?”

      “Of course not!” Kenny’s eyes were welded with tears as he snapped his attention toward his brother, “It kills me that I am invisible to them most of the times! That I can’t have a normal relationship with our younger brother because they are scared my ‘homosexual spirit’ will jump into him! You just don’t get it because you don’t have to deal with these problems. You see the different version of them than I see!”

      Kenny inhaled deeply, lowered his head and wiped his eyes. A quick scoff escaped from him.

      “I’m sorry, Mal,” his voice now lower and calmer, “I have so much on my mind that, I don’t know, it hurts, I guess. I mean, I didn’t intend to lash out on you about mom and dad.”

      Malcolm dropped a mitt at Kenny’s feet and proceeded over to the pitcher’s mound.

      “You know,” He started, a little agitated in tone, “If you called them more maybe, just maybe, they may have a change of heart or an epiphany, whatever you want to call it. Did you ever think of that?”

      “Did you ever think of that I did do that at the beginning and after so many ‘I’m doomed to hell’ or my personal favorite ‘God will never bless your life as long as blah blah blah’ before one just walks away?!”

      Malcolm sighed and brushed the mound off with the toe of his shoe.

      “Let’s drop it, okay?”

      “Fine, I guess.”

      “Although, it is kinda’ cool to have a brother who has superpowers.”

      And with the light and gentle tone back in his brother’s voice, Kenny was able to smile and play his favorite sport with no tension on the field. He was able to keep his mind clear as they practiced pitching at first, gabbing about the many women Malcolm has seduced on South Beach with his fancy beach house and joking that Kenny was living the life in California with his money. A quick sensation went through him like a reminder of why he came back: William. It created a type of fear that would only succumb to anger and not for a lack of trying against it but Kenny found much easier to be angry inside. He was thinking about so many things but the main one was the worst one; that man. The last thing he said, before he vanished again, echoed in the back of his mind with the disease running around the edge of his thoughts.

      Once they had moved on to bunting, the topic of conversation shifted more toward why Kenny left and after a lot of dodging, he confessed. Malcolm was visually upset at not being told such a huge thing but once Kenny pointed out he would have reacted violently toward William, his older brother just shrugged it off and continued playing.

      “You could’ve done a lot better, if you ask me.”

      “I didn’t want better until I finally woke up.” Bunt.

      “Which makes me happy to hear. I knew he was playing you when I met him at my birthday party the year you returned home.” Catch.

      “How were you so sure?”

      “I wasn’t completely, but a player can spot another player, dude. And if he’s back in your life again here, like you said, I would bet it’s another game he’s playing.”

 

      After an hour of baseball and gazing over the Bay, Kenny and his brother returned back to the house next to the patches of pine. He went up to his room as Malcolm joined the cheering with Jerry and Shawn in the living room, another football game playing on the widescreen. The sun had started to set and created a blue-purple tint in the sky that softly lit the bedroom and the bathroom. When Kenny turned on the bathroom light, he sluggishly scooted over to the standing shower, disrobed and enjoyed the hot water on his skin. The school of fish printed on his shower curtain took most of his attention until he saw rapid flashes of the attack. When he came to, the bathroom had filled up with steam and he was leaning against the shower wall in despair. His mind flooded of his Protector however he had no choice but to take him for his word and believe he was okay.

      Dove body wash for men was his soap of choice and he covered his body in a good lather with a rainbow flag sponge while his mind swam every direction. He contemplated his future and what that meant now. Even with school starting soon, he found it hard to bring his focus to the simplest of just choosing a major. Only twirls of fire and crashes of black lightning held his attention until he groaned and pounded his forehead with his fist in frustration. He didn’t see how anything made sense anymore and it didn’t help that he was being told by a complete stranger that he had the strongest power in the universe. Well, maybe not so complete.

      How was that even possible? He thought as he began a second lather. Even though he knew Christian was a stranger of a few days, Kenny couldn’t help the feeling of trustworthiness and honesty whenever he was around him. He was so lost in deep thought, seeing flashes of the attack fewer in his mind, that he didn’t hear the footsteps enter the bathroom until he heard the toilet seat fall down.

      “Shawn? Why are you in here? Don’t you have a bathroom of your own?”

      “Kenny,” It was Jerry. His voice was soft and confused. Kenny was glad the curtain kept his expression hidden and he sighed deeply into the running of the shower.

      “Jerry, um, hey,”

      “I need-you really have to understand this is difficult-I mean, I don’t know what to think.” Jerry’s voice was strained and cracked a little.

      “Hey, buddy, come on, everything is very new for me, too. I can’t really put it into words.”

      “Can you try?”

      Kenny sighed again and looked up at the ceiling.

      “Would you believe me if I told you that I may be some kind of supernatural warrior? That’s the best way I can explain it, really.”

      There was a moment of silence before Kenny heard a small movement from the toilet area.

      “Care to explain a little more?”

      “Well, I would love to but I am kind of in the middle of a shower.”

      The next few moments took Kenny by surprise; Jerry had darted from sitting on top of the toilet and poked his head through the shower curtain.

      “Dude, I’m straight. I’ve shared a shower with a whole football team before and trust me, buddy, it’s not as sexy as you fantasy about.” Jerry’s voice had found a little humor now, “Anyways, you have two choices; one, I can stay with my head poked here until you’re done or two, I can sit back on your toilet.”

      Kenny snorted and pushed Jerry’s face out of the shower viewing area.

      “Fine, but only if you promise never to do that again!”

      A small laughter was heard and Kenny just proceeded on to explaining to his fraternity brother everything he knew about Christian and what he was told about his powerful soul, making sure to use air quotes after ‘powerful’ outside the shower for his friend to see. He cut off the shower but continued to talk about the journey under the mountain and the attack in the valley also explaining that his suicide attempt was a part of what he thought was a dream.

      Before he could even ask, a towel was passed through and when Kenny stepped out, his counter was lined with blunts and joints and Jerry was placing a towel at the bottom of the closed door. As Kenny was wrapping the towel around his waist, his friend turned around with a humorous cunning smile.

      “We are going to hotbox this s**t. I need this as sure as you do.”

      “Can I get dressed first?”

      “You’ve really never been inside of a locker room have you?”

      Jerry brushed by his friend and put a blunt to Kenny’s face.

      “Let’s light up!”

      Kenny reluctantly but cheerfully obliged. The two sat in the bathroom; Jerry against the sink and Kenny against the door, filling it with smoke as the steam evaporated, getting high as Jerry brought up the secret he told when they first became close friends.

      “Don’t ever let anyone tell you different, buddy,” Jerry began in a sigh, “But life gets a lot better than you think.”

      “Jerry-”

      “No, let me finish,” Jerry extended his hand, “You remember when I told you about that…thing…that happened?”

      Kenny slowly nodded.

      “After everything…took place… I took a bunch of pills that I never told you about.”

      “What? How? When?”

      “I was unconscious for a day, laying in my own vomit and droll, only thinking about the second chance of life I was just given. Even though my mom never believed me when I told her that her fiancé did…what he did…the touching…the…anyways, I never let it consume me after that.”

      Kenny took one more hit from the blunt and passed it over.

      “Why did you never tell anyone else?”

      “I felt like no one would believe me but mostly because my mother never believed me and went on to marry the son of a b***h. Anyways, don’t give up and pursue everything you can dream of, buddy. Because I did. I wanted a house, a family, success and a child.”

      “You got everything you named, too.”

      “See what I mean? Don’t let your sickness keep you from doing anything that would make you less than the real you. And if you feel that your powers are going to better you in the long run, then embrace it fully! Shout it from the highest mountain top!”

      Kenny smiled and inhaled another waft of smoke before Jerry reached up and grabbed the other joints. The clear night progressed gradually as Malcolm had unpacked enough for a few days in Kenny’s empty drawers while Jerry left for home and Shawn set up sleeping arrangements on the couch. Once he gave his brother and best friend a final good night, he fell off into a deep sleep, his eyes closing slowly.

 

      But when he opened them, he stood in the center of an immense crater, ruin and damage all around. The mountain range surrounding him was singed with deep smoke and the crater itself gave off a slight mirage of smoke from the crevasses of its steep cliffs. A piece of the mountain he had come out of with Christian was blown into bits of rocks and the moons were slightly shielded by transparent ash clouds. Only a small ray of moonlight landed softly on a small crystal path, but when Kenny went to proceed toward it, he found he was stuck in the position he appeared in. His legs felt like wood and his feet were cemented to the ground. A pinch of fear ached his throat as he thought it was another trap but nothing came except a very feathery breeze.

      As the white feathers brushed past his ankles, he noticed they had lifted into the air in a dreamy motion toward the tower that was now more blurred but still visible. It seemed to almost swallow up the horizon with a dim glow now. A small trail of radiating dust swirled in the opposite direction of the feathers, looping in and out of their gaps. It brushed past Kenny’s face, whispering his name gently causing him to shut his eyes again.

      And again he heard his name whispered in darkness.

      “Kenny, wake up!”

      “What?” Kenny pushed the hands off of him and opened his eyes in fright. His brother stood over him in the moonlight, shirtless in a green nightcap and a pair of South Park sweat pants.

      “Malcolm, what time is it?” Kenny sleepily looked over the edge of the bed under the window and saw it was after four in the morning.

      “Fifteen minutes after four. I…” Malcolm looked around nervously in the dark room, “I had to wake you bro, you…”

      “What?!”

      “You were glowing, Kenneth. Like, this gold dusty color.”

      Kenny rubbed his eyes and sighed heavily.

      “Why were you even up here this late at night?”

      “It’s early in the morning for me and I was about to shower before I head to the gym. You were glowing when I walked in. It was actually kinda’ warm and calming the closer I got to you.”

      The two brothers sat on the bed together just looking oddly away from each other’s gaze.

      “It…” Kenny’s voice was small compared to his brother’s and he could hear it with every word, “It’s my aura I was told.”

      “Huh.”

      “Could we talk about it after I wake up? This is still late for me.”

      “Oh, yeah.” He patted his little brother’s hump of a leg, “Go back to sleep and try not to glow again.”

      Kenny scoffed and snugged back under the covers as he drifted off to sleep to the faint sound of the shower running.

 

      Monday came with a dreary feeling and it seemed like the fog lingered all day. Traffic was bumper to bumper going in both directions in and out of Oakland. BART too was crowded going into San Francisco and toward Richmond. Kenny had left before noon in his outfit that came to him in the shower that morning: black khakis with a grey tank top and his jean jacket, that he had started to really love again, and a plain brown backpack with golden stitching. He had waited around for Malcolm to return before having to leave for school in Berkeley.

      First class of the day was Algebra and to Kenny it was easy as learning math in grade school. His class was full with students having to be asked to leave since there wasn’t enough desks and he was glad he got to class early. It wasn’t until his next class of Creative Writing, did he actually meet new people that he spoke with; Leon Dyer, Ivan Winzer and Rebecca Goldberg were all assigned to work together on their first group assignment.

      Leon reminded Kenny of a shorter, fatter version of Morris Chestnut with beaver teeth. Ivan was the same complexion, just a little taller but a lot skinnier than Leon and Rebecca loved to wear her long brunette hair in two big pigtails with sky blue ribbons to match her eyes. They each shared their writing strengths, Kenny admitted his was poetry that didn’t really have to rhyme. And he did little short stories here and there. The others enjoyed writing screenplays, novels or comics.

      Once class had ended, they all exchange numbers and parted ways outside on the plush grounds of the college. The day was still overcast but idle students still crowded the main grassy yards in conversations or laughter with each other as a steady stream of people walked around on the concreate. Kenny always hated first days because he hated the feeling of being lost. He knew where his classes were in the building, to a point, but he had no idea how to get off the grounds.

      Looking to his left and his right, Kenny scanned the grounds for any sign of a campus map. He spotted an interracial lesbian couple kissing against a blue emergency pole. Across from the kissing couple was a bench full of skateboarders talking about the latest trick, but right behind them was a slanted stone slab and a glass protected campus map. Kenny excused himself in and out of the traffic of people as he rounded on the boarders and grabbed the sides of the slab, dropping his backpack on his side. Once he memorized his route out, he swung his bag over his shoulders, turned to leave and walked smacked into the middle of a solid mass of body.

      “I’m sorry, I wasn’t watching where I was going…” Kenny was apologizing, when he stepped back and looked up.

      “We have to talk.” William grabbed Kenny’s wrist and turned to rush off, but Kenny snatched out of his hold and stood angered and confused. He noticed William was still wearing the same chain strapped boots, but had found a suit with no jacket, vest unbuttoned, shirt half buttoned and everything about him looking tired and disheveled.

      “Where have you been?”

      “Not now! Let’s talk somewhere else.” William was trying to keep his tone at a hush while suppressing the overwhelming need to yell.

      “No!” Kenny shouted, not caring about yelling, “Where have you been? Malcolm said you haven’t been by once to check on me. I have been out for three days! And all you do is come to the hospital room and cause a ruckus-”

      “I CAUSED-?!” William caught himself in mid outburst and quickly composed his demeanor, “You’re brother is here now?”

      “What did you expect when people hear you try to kill yourself?!”

      This time, William showed his impatience at the onlookers and hastily pushed Kenny on the route he was going to take off the campus and didn’t stop pushing until they entered an empty park a few blocks away. There was only a two seat swing set, a broken slide and a park sign with graffiti that once read to never feed the squirrels. Kenny spun around in frustration but saw William was already pacing back and forth, chin clutched in left hand.

      “William, I-”

      “Don’t talk.” He said quickly, not looking up, “I need to really talk to you and I can’t think with you blabbering all the time.”

      Kenny didn’t know whether to storm off and say f**k it but he was also curious as to what William was dying to say so badly. So he chose to stay and flopped onto a swing seat.

      “I’m leaving you.” William blurted.

      “Huh?!”

      He stopped pacing and looked down at Kenny, who was even more confused and angered.

      “This isn’t going anywhere and last time I didn’t have the balls to do it to your face.”

      “You goddamn right you didn’t have the balls,” Kenny had sprung to his feet and got face to face, “What the hell did you come back for? The only difference from last time is that you don’t have that stupid piece of s**t on your shoulder. Rest his soul.”

      “Look! I’m sorry you’re still upset over something that happened so long ago-”

      “TEN MONTHS! IT HAPPENED TEN MONTHS AGO!”

      “But you need to get over it and move on. I can’t trust you anymore and I thought you were different.”

      “You-you’re blaming this on me?” Kenny asked stepping back, hurt and taken aback.

      “You’re too emotional and just too damn unattractive now. That’s not a swimmers build around your stomach. I just can’t love you.”

      Kenny felt his heart racing and his blood pressure rising. Tears streamed down the side of his face and he pushed past William in fury and disappeared into the crowd of people on the sidewalk.

      But he never once looked back because he would have noticed William looking forlorn and miserable and suddenly vanished in a quick spin of a fireball, shooting into the darkened sky at the speed of light.