A Heart's Confession

Feeling are told, but when one has been hurt so much before it's frightening, and when one is able to trust, healing can truly start

He let out a sigh before he picked up his phone, he turned to a servant before he started to dial a number he knew well. But he paused briefly, tonight was the night he was going to tell her, how he felt for her. She came into his life full of a warmth that was never felt by his ex-wife, and most of all she wanted to help him, when she herself hardly asked for help. A consort to dear friend and now it could be the time he dare called her his lover, he turned to a servant.

“Can you ask Nova to meet me in my study in 5 minutes?” Stolas asked the servant, they bowed before they left. Stolas took a deep breath before his finished calling the number, the phone rang before he heard a click sound.

“Blitz, I was just. oh, I see you're running late for our meeting. No it's alright if you are, but....could we take a rain check on tonight? Everything's fine, just a bad headache is all, we can meet another night if you wish. I assure you I'm fine, some rest and we'll have our meeting again.” Stolas talked on the phone, then he heard a light knocking on the door.

“I have to go Blitz, I'll see you later? Until then.” he added before he hung up the phone, the knocking was a bit louder this time.

“Yes, come in.” said Stolas. The silent feathery footsteps stepped across the palace floor. Nova stepped into the study, pulling her robe around her more when she felt a light chill in the room.

“You umm.....called for me Stolas?” Nova asked in a nervous manner.

“I did, I wanted to talk with you for a bit if you don't mind, I shan't keep you late.” answered Stolas.

“What did.....you want to talk about? If this is about something I did or if Stella told you anything-” Nova started to say, but Stolas cut her off.

“No, no you haven't done anything, Stella doesn't talk much about you since she moved out, we just....haven't talked in a long time, and between things with Blitz and my duties, we haven't talked much, and....I just miss that.” replied Stolas. Nova sat on a arm of a nearby chair, a little shocked at what she had heard from him.

“You enjoy our talks?” Nova asked him. He leaned against a small table.

“Long talks into the night, speaking of the night-sky and talking about of plants, herbs.....and feelings.” Stolas spoke softly as the last bit. “What?” asked Nova. Stolas turned away from her, his face turned red.

“Nothing!” He answered quickly. She could see there was something off about him.

“Is there something you want to tell me?” Nova questioned him. He knew she was smart and caught on better than most had done.

'I don't know if I can hide this from her much longer, how will she react?' Stolas thought.

“Stolas? Is there something on your mind, because you seem to be stalling on something, and I've known you long enough to know when you're hiding something.” said Nova, she had gotten to know him well over the past few months. He sighed as he looked outside the window, his back to her.

“Well, there is something, but I fear I may not acquire it.” he said. She looked confused.

“You can have almost everything your heart desires and there's one thing you can't seem to-” Nova did not expect to hear what she was about to hear next.

“It's you Nova.” answered Stolas. The room went dead silent for a few minutes before she found her voice once again. “W-what?” Nova asked him.

“My heart's desire is you, I love you Nova.” confessed Stolas.

The room was dead silent for what seemed like hours as Nova tried to go over what she had just heard from him. She shook her head trying to bring herself back to her senses, she stood up from the chair and ran her fingers through her hair and feathers.

“Am I.....hearing things?” Nova asked

“I said I-” Stolas tried to say again, she started to pace in front of him, hearing this kind of thing before, but it always lead to heart-break or a twisted joke to those she stayed with before.

“Okay, I'm not hearing things, is.....this some sort of game you're trying to go for with me because it's not-” Nova started to say, when Stolas walked up to her, she could see he was worried for her, he gently placed his hands on her shoulders.

“It's no game, you've never been a game to me Nova, I....I know most of the time other see you as nothing more than a consort, but please believe me when I say my feelings run deeper than that, gods I've been such a blind fool to what you've meant to me, I never thought you were that all. I speak only the truth when I say my feelings for you run so much deeper than what I first thought.” Stolas told her. Nova felt her head spinning as she pulled his hands off her shoulders.

“I....do you even hear yourself right now? Stolas you're getting a DIVORCE! You have a daughter! I'm trying to wrap my head around all this.” Nova said.

“I know what-” Stolas tried to say, but she pointed a finger at his chest.

“You lie like a cheep rug, you're like me, you barely know the first thing about being in love and developing feelings for someone.” Nova pointed out. He sighed, this woman seemed to speak the truth even better than himself.

'Well she's not wrong.” thought Stolas as he watched her pace around the room.

“A-and you just blurt this out of no-where, and.....these feelings are now coming to the surface because Stella is leaving you after almost a year after all she put you through, do you even understand what you're feeling?” Nova asked him. Stolas took her hand gently when she stopped walking.

“I'll be honest no, Nova, I don't understand these feelings, because I've never felt them before, not to Stella, not even to Blitz, it's so much stronger than anything I've ever felt in my life.” said Stolas as he held her hand tenderly, he could feel it's warmth as he ran his fingers over it to take in how it felt to him. Only for it to be jerked away from him.

“Are you even sure of that?! Can you even be a 100% sure it's even love you're actually feeling?!” Nova nearly shouted at him. “N-” he tried say again before she cut him off.

“You don't clearly!” Nova snapped. He could hear the anger rising along with what sounded like she was trying not cry.

“I'm being clear as day! I love you-” Stolas tried to tell her once again. But she just stared at him with confusion and what appeared to be hurt behind her eyes. Had no one every told her that they loved her before? Is this why she was acting this way?

“No, you just love my company because Stella is leaving-” Nova began to stay.

“Nova do you honestly believe that is my regard of you?” Stolas asked her. She wrapped her arms around herself, she felt her chest tighten as her breath quickened. “Please don't-” she tried to tell him. Suddenly she felt his warm hands back on her shoulders, using his right hand, turned her face up to his.

“I love you Nova, all that you are. Not only your passion......but your mind, your voice when you sing. The way you are able to stand up to Stella the way you do, how you are so kind and caring, yet strong when you can be, and you have such a fire about you.” Stolas told her. The only kind words she had heard since she arrived was always from him. Past words started to echo in her head.

'You're a disgrace to us!'

'I went out with you as a joke! What good are you if you can't give and heir!?'

'You actually seem cool, to me at least.' what Octavia had told her after a few months being at the palace, Stolas's voice snapped her back to the present.

“Nova, I love just the way you are, to me.” said Stolas as he reached out to her again. Nova backed away from him, a lump building in her throat as tears threatened to break out from behind her eyes at the words and thoughts that were rushing through her head.

“N-no, Stolas do you know anything about me?! What I've gone through! I know Blitz can please you but.....I can't and.....you don't have the courage to cheat on him with the likes of me! Less he kills the both of us!” Nova exclaimed at him. Stolas sighed as he thought on her words, he did care of Blitz, but not as deeply as he did for her.

“I suppose you're right, I'm not that courageous. Because I don't want any other demon, or imp, or even the highest rank of Goetia.” said Stolas, Nova felt her cheeks flush as he walked back over to her and take her hand once more, bringing it up to his face.

“I may not know what you've been through before coming here, and I really want to get to know you better. I've never met anyone like you before, whenever you enter a room, I can barely take my eyes off you. And you're wonderful with Octavia, teaching her so much and being there for her when I can't, but when I hear Stella trying to be cruel to you, I feel a rage building up within me, and if she hurts you in anyway, I don't what she's says, there isn't anything I wouldn't do to protect you, the way you protected my daughter all those years ago, even at the cost of my life.” Stolas added.

“D-don't say....” Nova looked away from him. But he kept going.

“Even when it's just us alone or apart, there's nothing more I want than to be with you, having deep meaningful talks long into the night, discussing the things we love, then you curling up in my arms as we hear each other's heartbeat, we don't need to be physical yet for the two of us to be content, I do want to be intimate when I know we're BOTH ready for it. But until then just wanted to exist with you is-” Stolas was cut off when Nova turned away from him.

“Enough! Just.....just stop, you're just embarrassing yourself-” Nova nearly shouted as she opened the door from the study to the hallway.

“I could never be-” Stolas tried to tell her as she left the room.

“And I would just further it! Like everything else in my life! Even I'm not 100% sure if what you know and are actually feeling is real! Even if you're trying to throw yourself to me it's a waste, because I can't give you what you want! I never could! And....it's just going to bring us nothing but pain!” Nova shouted as she walked down the hallway, Stolas not far behind her. She didn't know how much longer her tears could be held back.

“It may bring us pain! I know! I wouldn't risk the respect of those around me just for anyone! You know how much I love my daughter, and it kills me to see almost leave because her father is falling in love with another woman that isn't her mother! But you know feelings of love can't be tamed that easy and they're wild-” Stolas tried to tell her before she turned back to face him.

“AND THAT'S WHATS FRIGHTENING!! To me...” Nova screamed at him, she could no longer hold her tears back anymore as she placed her hand on the door handle of Stolas's room. She broke down sobbing. He felt his heart starting to crack seeing her tears coming from her face and dropping onto the floor.

“Just.....I thought before but.....look you....you know I'm the daughter of a disgraced president, and you're a prince, a higher rank than me, it just screams that we could never be together!” Nova shouted as she opened the door.

“You think I care about that, I've never cared about the status of others, it matters nothing to me!” exclaimed Stolas as he followed her into the room.

“I won't let you throw everything away because of me, your life, what you have.....it would be my fault......as it always is.” Nova told him, still not being able to face him.

“It wouldn't! My life is nothing without you! You and I have a chance to at last be happy, we can't let that go, what about this is so-” Stolas saw her lavender eyes turn to face him, tears still not stopping.

“Because I'm scared alright! You're the first one to ever show me a form of affection, of love and all these feelings at once, I'm truly scared.....” sobbed Nova. The fear and overwhelming pushed her to this. To give all she had and never been given love of any kind in return. “Darling.....” Stolas reached out to her again, but she flinched away like he was going to hurt her like others before him.

“So just stop-” Nova started to tell him.

“I'll never stop.” Stolas said to her.

“I can't give you-” Nova tried to continue.

“If you say an heir I don't care about that-” Stolas told her.

“The affection you want and-” Nova told him as tears kept falling. Stolas took a gentle hold of her shoulders.

“None of that matters, and I'll shout it from the highest point, I'm in love with you Nova.” Stolas told her. Nova couldn't bare to look at him and just turned her face away from his own. “Stop talking!” she shouted at him.

“Why can't you understand?” Stolas asked her. She pulled away from him, holding a nearby dresser, her sobs a bit louder as she at last turned to see him.

“It's so much, and it's so scary...” sobbing Nova. Stolas cupped her face in his hands, using a finger wiped away a few stray tears from her eyes and cheeks, he couldn't bear to see her like this, the lavender night eyes he grew to love, now hurt and filled with tears.

“My moonlight, I know this is scary, but listen, I've never been more sure of anything like this in my entire life, please believe me, I would stake everything I have, the power I have as a prince and much more, if it meant I could see you happy. And if I must, I will tell you a thousand times until the end of days if you want to hear it, I love you. And there is nothing that will change this heart of mine, it will never change how I feel towards you and-” Stolas told her.

'To hear such words from him....from anyone.....I-” her thoughts became interrupted with a passionate kiss on her beak. She had never been kissed like this before, she backed up into the dresser as she felt him set her on top of it. His kiss only deepened as her tongue explored his mouth, her hands digging into his back through his robe. Her breath was labored as the kiss broke.

“S-Stolas...I....” Nova tried to tell him something. She felt him kissing her neck, her body felt hot as she let out little sounds of pleasure that only seemed to arouse him as she felt his hands exploring her body both above and underneath her robe.

“This.....is what you've wanted.....all along...?” breathed Stolas as he took in her scent, she felt his beak and tongue on her neck, trailing back up to her face, his kisses didn't stop.

“W-we're-in your-” Nova tried to tell him through her breathes. She felt her heart beating faster and how his body felt against her own through their robes. He buried his face into the crook of her neck. She let out a few surprise gasps as she ran her fingers through his feathers.

“Nova....” breathed Stolas. She stopped him and untied her robe, exposing her chest, she felt this was wrong but didn't care. He reached out and touched her shoulder, as he traveled to her arms he felt her shaking, he didn't know if it was the excitement of what was going to happen or if she was frightened, if she was he would stop, he was a gentleman after all.

“You're....trembling, are you?” Stolas asked her as he slid a sleeve of her robe off her arm. She placed a hand on his chest.

“I-I am scared about.....but yet, I'm also excited, I just don't know how to describe this....” breathed Nova. Stolas took her hand and kissed her wrist, taking her scent in once more and brushing her hand against his face, his eyes locked on her own.

“Perhaps this is wrong? If you want me to stop....we'll go no further...” Stolas told her. She pulled herself closer to him, he ran her fingers through her hair before he lowered one hand to her exposed chest.

“I don't want to stop.......please....” begged Nova.

“Alright.” Stolas answered, he drew her closer to him, his hands wrapping around her back as he kissed her neck again, he didn't noticed his robe was starting to slide off.

“S-Stolas....I-I-” Nova tried to speak but another kiss from him silenced her voice as if he knew what she wanted to tell him. He broke the kiss this time.

“Sshhh, darling, I know, and I'll say it again if you wish.” whispered Stolas as he pulled her close to him and claimed her mouth again with another passionate kiss before he placed his hands on her waist, then straddled her thighs to become closer to her.

The following morning, Stolas woke to find himself in his bed next to Nova, her feathers looked a bit ruffled but she was still sound asleep. He laid there watching her breathing as he propped himself up on his elbow, still watching in a loving manner.

'Heh, she's quiet cute when she's asleep.” thought Stolas, he reached out and brushed her a few strands from her eyes as he sighed. 'Oh dearest Nova.' Stolas thought, his hand traced her face to her shoulders and to where hips where she was covered in the blankets, he stopped himself from going further.

'I know this is frightening, and I know you've been hurt so much before, your willingness to at least try and trust me is a bit of a comfort I guess, this is just all so much for her to take in, and I guess for me as well.' were words he wanted to tell her but couldn't bring himself to less he awakened the sleeping beauty next to him. Stolas turned over and buried his face into his own pillow.

'Oh by any and all gods, I just flat out told her that I have feelings for her, I got so caught up and.....I didn't realize it was a bit overwhelming for you, to have that kind of affection when you've never felt it before......ever....' Stolas looked at her as his let his thoughts speak for him.

He noticed her starting to shutter, he didn't know if she was cold or a bad dream was invading her dreams. Stolas pulled her close to his chest and wrapped his arms around her, her shuttering stopped, he looked down at her.

“Please Nova, if you don't give up on me, then I won't give up on you either, my darling” Stolas whispered as softly as he could as he brushed her soft feathers/hair and kissed her forehead and nuzzled in the same place where he had kissed her. He suddenly felt her hand as it became laced with his own. Stolas smiled down at her.

'Hm, it'll take some time, but at least she's starting to trust again.' smiled Stolas at these thoughts before he pulled her close to him once more.

Author's Note

Nova belongs to me

Stolas belongs to vivziepop