Chapter 1 The Begining
A Chapter by MoonLight Ninja
Xahort was finally defeated and Roxas became his own person the world where all locked once again. Knowing that Roxas could never return
to his life with Hayner Pence and Olette because the world were he new
them was fake Roxas returned to the true Twilight Town and locked his
self in the Manchen and went down to the computer to try and recreate
the Twilight Town where he was known. Two years has pasted since then and Roxas Failed to create the Twilight Town but in his research and divalipment he stumbled
across a way to control the empty shells Called Nobody Roxas Diced he
would Creat an Army if he couldn't return to his old Twilight Town mabby
he could rule this one. suddenly there was a sound upstairs Roxas went
into the wight room where he found and owl the owl was holing a envelope
in its mouth Roxas took the envelope There was no address to or from
written on it But there was the letter V on the front of it Roxas
placed the envelope on the table and went to grab a letter opener when
suddenly Riku bursed throw the door shouting "Roxas I need your
help!"Roxas stooped what he was doing and Approached Riku.
© 2012 MoonLight Ninja
Reviews
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Alright, so slightly confused, maybe because I haven't seen this anime.
1) Who is Xahort? Who is Roxas? Who is Hayner Pence? Who is Olette? Who is Riku?
2) I know you said that you weren't very good with spelling, so maybe I can help?
3) I know you said you weren't very good with punctuation either, so maybe I can help there too.
4) Maybe it's just me, but the paragraphing seems a bit off.
I don't mean to be critical. Usually when I review I put what is good and bad, and if there is questions I try to answer them. Usually when I criticize, I only do like Punctuation, fast paced, slow paced, detail, grammar, etc. I don't think I'm too hard. ^_^ But besides that, this is pretty good. ^_^
Posted 11 Years Ago
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11 Years Ago
its not a anime
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11 Years Ago
Oh ok. I thought it was. Sorry.
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Stats
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1 Review
Added on December 1, 2012
Last Updated on December 5, 2012
Author
MoonLight NinjaCharters towers, Queensland, Australia
About
I am awesome
other website is
http://www.youtube.com/user/MoonliteNinjer
Ok all serryes now lets talk about me im realy bad at speling and punquwation so sorry about that i like vi.. more..
Writing
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