The Park

It's hard to say goodbye, even to a place.

I liked this park. It was one of the few places I could go and just think. I didn't have to be anybody because there wasn't anybody else. I liked the sound of the leaves rustling when the wind blew, and the crunching they made when you walked through the ones that had fallen. Even the muddy footprints left from dogs out walking with their owners after the rain.

I'd been coming here for quite a long time. Ten years I think its been now. Not much has changed, only me. I'm older, but not necassarily any wiser. Everyday I'd come here. I'd leave my job for the day and walk here and just sit. I didn't care if the weather wasn't the best, sometimes that made it seem even more beautiful.

This park, it's one thing I'd miss if I left my life here. I do have to leave. Its time. I've been running too long. I keep telling myself that I need to go back to my family, that they need to know I'm okay - I need to know that they are.

But I'm selfish enough that I want to stay. I like the animosity of it, nobody knowing who I am, nobody caring that I'm not good enough. Is that so wrong? To want a moments peace in such a crazy life?

In all that, I know its time, for real this time. I decide this is it, the last time I'll ever walk around this park. The last time I'll ever see those ducks swimming in the lake, see the local kids trying their hardest to play a decent football match over on the fields of grass.
I make it last, spending so much more time there than I ever have before. I want to take it all in, to remember every last inch of it - before I return to my old life. The life I'd run away from.

A breeze whips through the park, and I shiver as I pull my coat closer to me. It's almost as if it's saying goodbye, it knows I wont be back here. As I reach the exit, I look back over my shoulder.

I liked this park. Not much has changed, only me. I've grown up now. It's hard for me to do, but I let the gate fall closed behind me for the last time.

I keep walking. I can't look back anymore. I can't stay here anymore. It doesn't take me long to reach the high street, I know exactly where I'm heading.

The clerk welcomes me kindly, and asks if she can help. She can, because its time to move foward.

I smile back at her. "A ticket to London please."

"One way or Return?" A simple question, that not to longer ago would have had me running for the hills, but now that was easy to answer.

"One Way."