Life

random, dont know where i was going with this...maybe id add more later...

The pitter-patter of feet in the attic furthers my self-diagnosed insomnia. “Rats,” I tell him, trying to convince him of my theory. He shakes his head and insists its raccoons again. In my mind though, I still know I’m right. The last time I heard them was Christmas Eve almost a year ago. I lie in bed, anxious for another Christmas, fighting my body to fall asleep. The footsteps startled me. It took awhile to realize that the attic was above my bed. I asked him to listen and he tried to convince me it was the reindeer from Santa’s sleigh, although his lie wasn’t all that convincing with his puzzled face and stuttering. I could tell he was just as baffled as I was trying to figure out just what was making the noises that kept me awake. I was always too afraid to walk in the attic. Maybe because I had seen too many movies or it could have been my fear of heights and the shaky ladder that was the only entrance from the garage. I didn’t sleep much that night. A few hours after finally falling asleep, I woke up to Michelle tackling me. Mumbling for a few moments, I kept my eyes shut, wishing for a few more minutes of sleep or even just quiet. The day was always hectic. After giving in to her demands to get up, we went to Jimmy’s room and were as obnoxious as always to make him join us downstairs to open our stockings. This was an annual tradition. Waking up before mom and dad to open our stockings and guess what the gifts under the tree would be. There was always some new clever way to wrap the bigger gifts that wouldn’t fit in a box. When Jimmy finally woke up, we raced down the stairs to the family room and tore open our intricately decorated (by Grandma Pat) socks. What a weird tradition. All the while I’m feeling too old for this; too old for Christmas. I tell myself it’s silly, that everyone can celebrate Christmas. That it’s not pathetic I still live with my parents. Maybe next year I’ll have moved out already. It would alleviate a lot of my issues at least. Christmas was always very predictable. Once my parents woke up, we fought over something nominal, decided my mother was right like she always has to be, opened our presents and followed with breakfast. When I was younger we used to go to Christmas mass at our parish down the street, but that had been a fading tradition more recently. We fought over who would take the first shower, my sister usually winning that battle and then continued the day cleaning the house before the relatives came over. The way the house normally looked was a reflection on our family’s life. Papers scattered wherever there was a table surface, dog toys all over the floor, laundry piled in the laundry room either finished or waiting to be done (mostly both shared the space), and random musical instruments and music scattered around the house.

Reviews

[justjenn_2u]

I had to giggle about the socks you always receive. I always got socks from my uncle too, but they were wrapped in newspaper. I felt like I was reading a journal which made this interesting.

[Nicole A. Stephans]

So far, this is a fun read.
Writing a story in first person can sometimes be very hard, but so far, you've done well with it. I would watch your sentence structure; some sentences could be combined with others (using semicolons, commas, etc) to form more well-constructed ones.
Watch your use of words like "its" versus "it's". One sentence at the beginning, which reads: "He shakes his head and insists its raccoons again." The "its" in this sentence should be "it's" since you are trying to convey what something IS.

Nice work so far, keep it up.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Thanks for a vivid description of your Christmas... brings back memories too of the excitement as a kid and not being able to sleep waking up earlier then usual... Oh what fun times as a kid...

[.]

Well, I would say it is a very descriptive diary/journal of events happening for these days hehe- Very well with the imagery and emotions, as well as your thoughts. And u said that u want to write this as a biography, right? Well, good start to it, but, i think what u wrote here was an autobiography, where it's like a biography of a person, but it's narrated by him/herself, whereas a biography is usually a written history of a person's life. Either way, it's fascinating tho lol- good luck with it- good start :)

Mike

[Roy]

I really enjoyed enjoyed reading this. It's beautifully descriptive and moves very well. The love the way you share not only the events that unfold but also your thoughts. And it's those thoughts, from an active intelligent mind, that are the most interesting..at least to me....