Remember

wrote this in 2002, so sorry if its not that polished. can't really edit this cause i dont really like writing on the topic unless it comes up in life in a certain way...anyway...yeah.

I was too young to comprehend the situation

But I remember the scene perfectly

The snow lightly fell unto the ground

Gradually transforming the setting outside

I held my brothers hand as he struggled breathing

He took quick short breathes as his pale body quivered

I wished to do everything in my power to make him feel at ease

But my ideas always seemed to fail

As he took a final breath, he seemed calm and peaceful

I didn’t know I’d never see him again

I cried, thinking he was in pain

Yet I never knew it was quite the opposite.

 

Reviews

[Michael Raymond Robinso..]

What a powerful tale of sorrrow and pain. Yet your love for him shows. I sat by my father's bed the day he died, I to holding his hand in a hope to make him feel at ease. I was not there when his pain ceased later that night, but with my family on an Easter Eve. This is a strong prose of emotions here, thank you for sharing.

[mattavelli]

I'm sorry. :(

[.]

I agree with Brette on this one, too. Yea, i know u've told me before about him. Such a sad story. But he's healed now, and is smiling, as well as with you by your side guiding you in every step you take :) A very heartfelt poem. And an awesome pic of him too!

Mike

[Brette Medb]

This was heart wrenching and so powerful. The snow gives it a magical quality almost like painting the picture of his death and even though he is in pain at first it is almost as if the snow covers it, healing the wounds until there is no pain. Great write.


Brette

[rachel D]

i agree with some other revieweres- i can't review this.
it's short and sad and honest.
thank you for sharing this with us.
rachel

[Imperfection]

I cried, thinking he was in pain

Yet I never knew it was quite the opposite.

This is a heartwrenching write.
It's images like these that stay loyal to the heart even when other memories are forgotten.
Sad but very well expressed.

[James K. Blaylock]

Such a powerfully sad read. You can feel the love and care flowing so easily through your words. I'm sorry for your loss.

[Roy]

Very sad..expressed with such tenderness and sincerity....

[M I N D Y]

a beautfiul poem of love... you did do the right thing... you did know how to help him... you loved him and held his hand when he needed it most.

blessings

[RAWR!]

i dont think i can review this really,
very personal, very strong.

*gives a cookie and points at the sun*

[Sean Allen]

It looks to me like your idea was a perfect success, not a failure. You held his hand and made him feel at ease.
sa