Worthless

More very old words of a past left far behind…

Folding in

Folding over

Looking out

Looking on

Loosing me

The spite in her eyes… So unremitting…

She hates me… She hates me…

Mother’s cold eyes cut deeper than blades,

As her words shred, leaving me in tatters

Helpless to the onslaught when her rage strikes

Getting lost

Falling under

Ground up

Spat out

Left behind

The mistake of reaching out for help…

Who was he to touch me?

Betrayed when trust should rule

Secrets, shame to cap the pit

I am become nothing

Lost… alone

Falling… pain

Failing hope

Forgotten

I’m Worthless

by D. Denise Dianaty

Reviews

[therisa]

I can hear, my inner critic shouting this poem, at me, during my darkest and lowest hours, Momzilla. As I find myself, collapsing, into a black depression, which death seems, the only options, available to me. Thankfully, it will 4 years, this holiday season, since my last experience, with these feeling of mine. Thank you, for posting this old poem of yours.

[MomzillaNC]

Thanks for your review. I hope it didn't dredge up anything overwhelming. It was a long time ago for me and I've not experienced such black fall in decades now.

[therisa]

No, your poem hasn't dredged up any bad memories. Just reminded me, how far I have travelled, in the past 4 years. Will be meeting with a special friend, tomorrow, he'll re-enforce the positive message that you have been sharing with me.

[MomzillaNC]

Great! That should give you several things for your gratitude list.

[therisa]

Wouldn't be here, without his help, over the past 8 years.

[MomzillaNC]

You should make a gratitude list of the things he's helped you deal with and overcome. It's make a great way to say thank you while reveling in how far you come.

[therisa]

I tell him, every time, we talk or meet up.

[MomzillaNC]

Cool. :D

[RayXor]

ive been there and felt that. this is a great expression of those feelings
thank you for sharing!

[MomzillaNC]

Thank you. I hope you, like me, no longer dwell in such dark places.

[RayXor]

depends on the day ive had a rough year and my emotions have been erratic at best lately but seeing another's feeling helps me ground myself so thank you

[MomzillaNC]

See, I can get lost in other people's feelings. It's really difficult to shut out the more overwhelming emotional floods.

[RayXor]

i have those times but thats when i jump in the shower and start singing till the hot water is gone

[MomzillaNC]

That's when I feel compelled to reach out to answer the need in the emotional flood.

[Woody]

you've expressed the pain and betrayal in a poignant way. nicely penned.
I'm glad this belongs to your past.

[MomzillaNC]

Thanks for the review. Yes, you can see from some of my other works that I dwell in a much better place now.

[Woody]

u're welcome. and glad to hear that :)

[Haley Lynn Thomas]

This is very well written. I can really feel your pain through your words. So heartbreaking.

[MomzillaNC]

Thank you very much. Fortunately, these are words from a long ago past where my soul no longer cowers.

[Sami Khalil]

Sometimes we all feel those stages but rest assured things will change eventually like the seasons. Excellent...:)./.......

[MomzillaNC]

Happily, these are very old words of an tortured adolescence and not indicative of my life to day.

[Sami Khalil]

Good. You are welcome...:).................

[MomzillaNC]

I hope someone else struggling with similar issues will find my words and take hope from them.