White

Ode to Writer's Block

Somewhere out my window
Distant mountains symbolize
A feeling that I wish I had
Because contention with my life,
As odd as this may sound,
Only seems to come out white.

I'm not fishing for lonesomeness
As all of my intentions swarm
A manifest of perfection
Breaking from the social norm
I'm accustomed to with pen in hand
But since you're back, I've lost my form!

I guess I find it hard to understand
How I could make such a living out of
Feeling depressed, destroyed, deranged, deprived,
Searching for this long lost love,
When happiness seems to quench the fire,
A feeling that puts me above.

And so my body stares with threat
At a blank computer page,
Waiting for words to leave my head,
Waiting for players on the stage
To comply a show with words,
That I've strategically arranged.

But real life comes like sharpened swords,
Pouring to my blanking sight!
The laptop closes, days are longer
But inspiration fails to write,
And I can't seem to apprehend
The words that gather in my mind.

So because of you I can't amend
The words to thank you for the days
That we spent together as
They only seem to write cliches!
I'm not saying I'm not happy,
I just can't find the words to say.

-I'm saying that your presence is a joy
An inspiration to my life.
You fill my head with beautiful words
That form immaculate structures, pictures,
But when the words travel to my fingertips,
They seem to come out invisible.

Author's Note

Really its the last paragraph I'm not certain is necessary.

Reviews

[Aimee Mahathy]

I love this! "So because of you I can't amend
The words to thank you for the days
That we spent together as
They only seem to write cliches!"
That was perhaps the best, I think! I think a last stanza is needed as the one before it seems to end on a cliffhanger. It doesn't, technically, but I got the feeling that it did. Perhaps mess around with it a bit to figure out a better way to put it? However! The last two lines of the final stanza are perfect! Don't change those!

[J.V. Stanley]

Ahh...writer's block. I like to think of it as the static on a television screen, how fuzzy it gets in my head. Also the annoyance of having an epiphany that's so fleeting that as soon as you sit to compose, it has slipped through the cracks of memory. Quite aggravating.

[Muse]

To see white has to be better than black? Your muse was just mislead, she found you in your humor and cliche thoughts..... ;)

[just rose.]

The formality of the stanzas here functions ironically as an ode to writer's block. I like the little homages to 19th century phrasing and metaphor - this is kind of like a gentleman's Grand Tour through a big white sheet of paper, which, as another level of irony functioning beneath or around the initial irony - creates many many beautiful words as a celebration of someone special in your life. A really neat meta-concept poem, as whimsical and concentrated as an Escher lithograph.

[White Ink]

Not certain last paragraph is necessary? u kidding?!!

"But when the words travel to my fingertips,
They seem to come out invisible. "
i totally loved the last 2 lines... they made this whole piece.

[Clarisse Nanoit]

"I guess I find it hard to understand
How I could make such a living out of
Feeling depressed, destroyed, deranged, deprived"
Too f*****g true. I recently heard that Adele went on record saying that she likes being depressed because it's the only time she can write or it's when her best work is done. I live that every day. =P This is great (as always).

[WindSong]

This is a really nice poem. Your descriptive wording is excellent, as well as the imagery and delivery. It kept my interest all the way through. It appears you have a flare and great natural talent for writing.

[Kyla H]

The flow and feeling of this is wonferfull, you have a very good talent.

[Joiedevivre]

i feel this says the meaning is between the lines. You did a wonderful job of expressing the 'inexpressible', i often feel words can not express my state of mind either which is why poetry might work in these moments. Really enjoyed this, thanks.

[Celeste21]

I love how you were honest abt how you felt, and how hard it is to explain how you feel abt some1 w/ sounding mundane or cliche, when your feelings are anything but. This truth adds to the sincerity of your poem, and that alone speaks volumes.

[CarrieLynn {Chameleon A..]

I like the visuals this piece brought! Good job!