Speaking Up From Being Fed Up

speak up

Is friendship just an illusion?

Is that the reason why I am hurting so much from all the excuses that people be using?

Is that the reason why I am the ringleader of this pain that is also called my confusion?

Is it that I am tired of putting myself on the line and hurting for everyone when people are not acting like themselves and as a result themselves they are diluting.

Does anyone hurt for the real?

Does anyone know how pain truly feels?

Why is it that I feel I am ran by aggression?

That maybe this is the way I have been feeling since I have been trapped inside the mind of a teenage adolescence.

I craved for help maybe that is why I picked up a pen and paper not for a talent, not for a gift, but for protection from the depression that I sometime feel hoping one day that when I burn out forever then maybe I can have a resurrection.

I can't cry....

Why?

Cause my heart I been trying to rebuild for so long it has died.

Then I try to let one in as they split it in two, and here I am at square one again what a surprise.

Writing is for anyone and it's for me can't you see that maybe I am not crazy that I am not your enemy.

That I am just a soul that wants to help others while I try to set myself free.

Though I hide behind nothing I say what I feel on my knees I been but it hurts to kneel.

Instead I scream so what if I am not what you want me to be. I am tired of speaking from now on when I speak I scream and with these words I can use to help and kill.

Being nice has it's wrong and rights, but why am I fighting why am I here. How is it that I go off and on with this power to bring electricity like when a pole is struck by lighting?

I feel for some and they feel for me.

How is it that those who understand stuff about me has not even known me for long?

How is it that those that didn't exist years ago wished me luck when I was gone?

That they told me to keep my head up and be strong...

Though I often wonder like any natural person in this world how long can I hold on?

I am not changing teams my back I will never turn, but I wish oh how I wish that I find my way back home.

Back to that smile that made me smile so bright. I am tired of being blind cause this world is hell and falling apart, but if it never changes keep my eyes I don't want back my sight.

Cause I have been played and destroyed. Feelings I had to send away clearly they have been deployed. I ask questions yet I get the purest of answers just admit that with me you may be annoyed.

So here I stand with rage in this cage that I have built myself that I have enclosed myself from this book of life.

Wondering when again will I turn the page.

People talk so much as if they know...

People say that they have no problem talking about people.

Admitting that they are judgmental, but get upset when people talk or judge them so.......

Yet they talk about race I thought that was gone in the first place.

Quick to talk behind my back or anyone who is real back instead of saying it to my face.

…..Damn

Yet you call yourself a woman or a man.

Yet when you are exposed you are quick to kill with a gun some plan..............................................man...

We need to wake up.

Cause one day I may crack up.

If you don't like this or don't like me I can care less or that much give a fu%%.

Take it and shove it this is the power of emotion that I feel from time to time cause I am tired and plain and simple with the games and ignorance that makes this world that was once good bad.

I am fed up........

Feel our pain yet?

Author's Note

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