Sins

ruffling through my old pages lately....

If darkness had a name

What would you call it?

Someone who could take the blame

that is yours…but you’re afraid to admit

 

Wicked lilies at your door

Daring you to pick them up

Tsk,tsk…this darkness…easy to adore

Drinking your tears from morality’s cup…

 

Ascending…descending from this debasement

Because our obstinance is leading all the time

So who gets to decide the final assessment?

And who gets to write the infinite rhyme?

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

Reviews

[Lyndy]

I like this poem, it's really beautiful, mystical and inspiring! :D

[Ana B.]

Thank you very much Lyndy :)

[anne]

Someone who could take the blame
that is yours…but you’re afraid to admit..
beautiful Ana...:))

[Ana B.]

Thank you dear :)

[Mayank]

I think somewhere between 1st and 2nd verse I lost connection, it doesn't mean the poem is bad. I liked the way more it begins from the second verse. The flow is brilliant and the words are thought gripping!

[Ana B.]

Thank you for the opinion, i'm glad you liked it after all :)

[NoelHC]

An interesting web and flow to the message in this, and in the meter of the poem. Well done.

[Ana B.]

Thank you dear Noel.

[wordman]

this sounds like the inner thoughts of many

[Ana B.]

i'll never know if that's a good thing....

[wordman]

that might be best,lol who knows

[Chris]

Ego and Id... This would be worth discussing over coffee in a Cafe`

[Ana B.]

I can foresee hours of debates :)

[Chris]

what a way to spend one's time ...sharing and creating.

[Elisa]

I think way that this poem is written rhetorically definitely reflects the subject. So many complex images and thoughts all jumbled together in one poem, reflecting the complexity and confusion that comes with humanity trying to understand (and ultimately conquer) sin. I think your use of imagery is so unique, and the poem was very thought-provoking overall. Great job :D

[Ana B.]

Thank you very much for the lovely words Elisa. I'm glad you stopped by!

[SleeplessVolcano]

This is so thought-provoking....opening up more questions than what one would expect a few lines can do. Is darkness external? is it internal? Are we inherently good? Or bad? Have we lost our way, or could that lost feeling just be part of the human condition? It is easy to stray to both extremes, i.e. Saying that we are either 100% good, or 100% evil - the fact that we all carry our own load - our sins - proves that we are not 100% good. Where does that goodness come from? Where does evil come from?
Excellent writing to be able to stir so many questions!!

[Ana B.]

I think the existence of evil is a necessity, only that way can be goodness appreciated, and well humans always walked on that edge...but one thing is certain - goodness and evil have the same sourse, the power lays in choice. Thank you for the amazing review SV :)

[Gerry Legister]

The imagery is enthralling, beautifully written

[Ana B.]

Thank you :)

[Roshan Nair]

And who gets to write the infinite rhyme?

This line took my breath away as it ended this light yet griping poem. Great work ana, sins are something we can only be subjective about and can't imagine being an objective judge about. I loved how you brought in the metaphors with darkness and lilies. Great work again :)

[Ana B.]

I'm glad you think so. Thank you :)