Clever-Tref

A Story by Missy Moooooo

If there was one day in my life that shaped me into who I am now it was: when I was twelve years old I auditioned for enrollment to The Center for Performing and Fine Arts of the Pennsylvania Leadership Charter School. It was a warm sunny day in August and my nerves were all over the place. I was unsure what to expect. I was at a new school, I was going to have new experiences, and hopefully new friends. With not knowing exactly how to prepare myself for my audition, I was sure it would be a disappointment. I was only in seventh grade, I did not have many music lessons, but I practiced everyday. I knew I had what it takes to get into this school, I knew that I was willing to learn more and to grow in my education on music.

The first impression I had of the lobby was that it was small, cozy and colorful. The lobby had remarkable and beautiful art, such as many different styles of paintings, drawings, photographs, a wide range of ceramics, and my favorite part was The Chair of Gum. This was a chair that students covered with their chewed bubble gum in an array of different colors and sizes. It felt as if I was at a museum of art, the art had really brought out the different levels of talent the students there portrayed. I was initially shocked and scared, and a little bit excited that I could be able to be that good one day. I was shocked because the advanced levels of talent these students that had attended here portrayed, it made me stand there in amazement for what seemed like forever. I came into the school so positive that I would have what it takes, but after seeing the lobby I was scared due to the fact that I did not think that I was good enough to be accepted into their school. I thought that my talent would not meet the director’s expectations.

I had no idea what his expectations would include, or what the day would include. All I was told to bring was whatever I was using for my audition, for me it was my clarinet, and my voice. Our parents were not even allowed to stay there and be included, they were told a drop off time and pick up time. I was glad that my brother was with me, if he was not I would have probably chickened out and ran off. The lady at the front desk introduced herself as Mrs. Harvey, and told us to head back to the room that had all of the big red and blue lockers. The room was packed full of hopeful students, but there was no chatter. Everyone wanted to make it and that made it hard to make friends when everyone was at competition to get into the school. After a while Mrs. Harvey came back and showed us all down the hall to the Atrium. This was where the students perform their annual plays and where the drama class takes place.

Mr. Allen, the director spoke first explaining what the day was going to be like. We then were split into three groups; each group was sent in a different area of the small school to start showing how we performed in each of the different classes. This was a way for the school to see the artistic, the creative and the musical traits that the hopeful students showed. My group started off in one of their two dance studios. The teacher Mrs. Wear, showed us the dance that she wanted us to reenact for her as best as we could. This was where she paid close attention, to see if we were good enough at paying attention to detail, direction, and if we could dance. There, she made us dance some were embarrassed, and some were confident in their ability to dance. I was embarrassed; I had never danced a day in my life, not to mention to anyone else.

We then had to backtrack to the music department, they then let us look around some of the classes; I walked into the guitar and keyboarding room. I counted about twenty guitars, and twenty keyboards. I had always wanted to start learning how to play the Piano. Given my musical background, I only sang and knew how to play the clarinet, but I already knew how to read sheet music, and I did not think that it would be that hard to pick up a new instrument. After we got to look around the music department I was set on dedicating my time to learn how to play the Piano. The teacher that was representing the Music department, Mrs. Roberts had us sit in a circle and asked us to sing or put our name to music. Soon enough it was my turn, I went to sing “Melissa” on a scale and all that came out was air. It was then that I realized my fear of singing in front of people. I just dropped my head in my hands and thought that I was messing everything up. I certainly did not think I would not be getting accepted now after that, since my application said “Enjoys singing and playing the clarinet.” I was so angry at myself after that had happened that I kept asking myself “How could that be true and I mess up that bad?”

Shortly after, we went to the art room; there was a set up of boxes and a pear in front of it. One of the teachers said “Your challenge is to draw what you see here, but do not just draw a pear and a box. Draw what you think it symbolizes to you. Portray it to how you are feeling right now.” I quickly decided that I would draw a glass box with a pear inside. “I picked this because right now I feel like everything I do here keeps getting me further and further from my goal.” I said when we were sharing. I remember the girl next to me saying that “it was a good way to portray how you personally see and feel.” I just smiled; I did not want to communicate with her because I was afraid I would never see her again. When we got back into the room with the lockers, I started talking to her. I found out that she too was going to audition with her clarinet. This made me more scared. It also made me worry if she was better than I was.

When Mrs. Harvey told us to start warming up, I decided maybe Beth could help me warm up so I could be my best going into the audition. When they called me back I was walking to the room on the verge of tears. I had my sheet music in one hand, and my clarinet clenched in my other. When I first walked in they asked me questions about why I wanted to be in their school. I had answered “I think this would be a good learning environment and a good chance to come out of my shell.” They also asked me why I could not sing but put on my application that I could, my answer to them was simple “I do love to sing, I have no idea why I froze up. I think I am afraid of singing in front of people.” They had me play the song I picked for them and they recorded it. I started playing up and down the scales and the sheet music that I had brought.

After all was done, they handed me a new piece of sheet music telling me to go into the practice room to learn it, and when I am ready to come back and try to play it for them. They gave me a song that was above my knowledge, but I did not want to tell them that I had no idea how to hit some of those notes. After a long time, I could not take the frustration anymore so I gave up and I walked back into the interview room, and when they asked me to play for them I honestly said “I'm sorry, this song is above my knowledge. I have no idea how to play many of these notes.” They said “Thank you Melissa you may exit now. You will be notified shortly if you are accepted into our school for the 2009 school year.” I was waiting patiently for them to call me back to tell me whether or not I made it, my brother found out right then during his audition that he made it. I was swarming with negative thoughts; my mom was already there in the locker room waiting with me. My brother started making some friends since he would see them again. My clarinet friend had not gotten an answer yet either. I was sure that they would call her back before me. After she got called back to see the director, she came back smiling and ecstatic. I was happy for her, but more scared for myself. Negative thoughts were swarming around me even more.

“Melissa Woodward.” Mrs. Harvey called from the door of the room. “Here goes nothing.” I thought. When I made it into Mr. Allen’s room, I was a mess inside. I had no idea why it took me so long to know if I would be accepted. I just wanted to know now. Mr. Allen said that he admired my honesty and they give that song to everyone and no one can ever play it. The ones that do play it do not get a spot unless he was blown away from their previous traits, because he thought that there was no level of growth. He asked me about my prior education and lessons with my clarinet I was honest and told him just traditional school lessons. When Mr. Allen told me that I was accepted, I looked at him with four eyes and said “What?” He smiled and said, “I think your ability and thirst to learn more is perfect for our school.” I knew then that things were going to change; I was a part of an amazing and talented school and I needed to start proving myself. I promised myself that whenever I left the Center for Performing and Fine Arts that I would have a better understanding of my musical and performing talents. After all it was time for me to take control and to stop chickening out.