Chapter 24 [Ana]

Gentle hands are wrapped around my head, running through my hair. Like something Kris would do when we were sleeping. I would lie on his stomach and he would automatically run his hands through my hair in his sleep. I loved it so much, and we did it every night. Oh, Kris. Is he the one doing this right now? Am I dreaming?

         “Kris?” I say, sitting up. It’s not Kris.

         “Ana?” Celia says. We’re both wearing our bras and panties, but nothing else. If someone walked in right now and saw us, they would think we trying to match, because they’re both black and laced.

         “Celia?” I say, or ask.

         “What… the f**k happened last night?” I say.

         “I can hardly remember… I just know I got super drunk. I don’t even know why I was so drunk…” I say, trailing off.

         “Did we…?” Celia asks.

         “I don’t know!” I say, super confused, standing up. Our tank tops are lying on the ground, along with our jeans. All the signs are there…

         “I think we did.” Celia says. I don’t really know what to say. Celia rubs her head. All of the sudden, her eyes get really wide, and she looks like she saw a ghost.

         “What is it?” I say.

         “What? Nothing…” She says. “Just- Just a hang over.”

 

         Celia and I are passionately making out on her bed. I’m on top of her, straddling her waist. She rips her shirt of and I do the same.

 

         “Oh s**t…” I say, sitting back down on the bed. “It’s coming back to me…”

         “Did…”

         “We definitely did.” I say, cutting her off. We sit in silence. It’s so incredibly awkward between us right now. I don’t know what to do, so I just say, “I’m really sorry…”

         “Ana, why are you sorry?”

         I can’t answer that. I’m not sure why I’m sorry, but I didn’t know what else to say.

         “I don’t know.” I say, kind of laughing to myself. Actually, I start to laugh a lot. I’m cracking up. Celia starts to laugh, too. We’re both laughing super hard.  Slowly, we stop laughing, and it gets awkward again. I need to get out. I can’t be in this house right now. But what should I tell Celia? Napoleon jumps up onto the bed, and nuzzles himself into me. I pet his head. That’s it! I’ll take him on a walk.

         “This little guy needs to be walked!” I say.

         “You should walk him.” Celia says. I can tell she knows I need to leave, and her saying that is a sign that I probably should. I walk out of the room to get the leash, and then run back in, realizing that I’m not wearing clothes. I slip them on. Celia watches, with sort of an evil smile on her face. Then I put Napoleons leash on, and pull on Kris’s huge combat boots that he always used to wear. Lately that’s all I’ve been wearing, because, I know it’s stupid, but it makes me feel closer to him. We walk out the door, and fresh air crashes onto my face. I can finally breath. It felt so weird and stuffy and awkward in there. Napoleon pulls on the leash, trying to run towards another dog about a block away. I give the leash a slight yank to signal him not to do that, and he stops right away. He has an adorable skip like thing in his step. I laugh at it. Walking down the street, It’s just me, him, and the GREAT outdoors. I start to think about the cocaine I found in Celia’s makeup bag. Should I have flushed it?

         It brings back possibly the worst memory I’ve ever had.

         I was walking back from work, back when I worked in a group home. It was pretty dark outside, but I had to walk home because I didn’t have a car. I always cut through on specific ally on the way home, because it was so much shorter then the other way. Half the trip. I was living with Kris, and Celia at the time. It was about 3 months after two people came into our house and attacked us. I had actually basically gotten over it. I felt safe.

         I walked down the ally, and then I saw two people. One girl, one guy. The same one’s that had attacked Kris and I. I could never forget their faces. The girl, she could have been pretty if she tried Her hair was long and black, and her eyes were small and dark, She was as thin as a twig. But she seemed so f*****g tall, much taller then the guy. The guy, he reminded me so much of Sam. His hair was spiked up and brown. They both looked super gross.

         At first when I saw them, I tried to tell myself they were just walking down the ally, and they weren’t there for me. So I tried to walk past them. I sped up when they got closer to me.

         “Hey beautiful.” The guy said. I tried to start running, but they ran after me, and they were so much faster then me. The girl tackled me. She pulled me to my feet and pushed me into the guy. Her held my arms. I tried to fight them both, and for a second I actually thought I was going to be able to fight him off, but he was too strong. I started to scream, so he covered my mouth with his face.

         “You see princess, Celia told us about you. In different, uh, studies, we’ve done,” The boys said, and they both laughed, “We’ve found it’s much more productive to hurt someone the person who owes us cares about, rather then actually hurting the person themselves.”

         The girl took out a huge knife she was hiding somewhere in her long, army jacket.

         “Scream, and your dead.” She said. I attempted to nod. The boy took his hand away from his mouth.

         “Please don’t hurt me.” I begged them. “I don’t even like Celia! She won’t care if I’m hurt!” I said, and they laughed. I started to cry.

         “Shut the f**k up.” The guy had told me. “And cut her baby.” He told the girl. She cut off my shirt, and then laughed.

         “Are these supposed to be b***s?” She asked me. I thought if I looked too weak they would do more to me, so then I spat in her face. Not the smartest thing I’ve ever done. She responded by punching me numerous times. Later I got 5 stitches in my lip. I started yelling that I was sorry. Eventually she stopped. She trailed her knife along my face, then my stomach.

         “It’s a shame to mess up this cute little body.” She commented. I was actually a little flattered, even though I thought she was going to kill me. Which you know, isn’t pathetic at all.

         As slowly as she could, she slashed me, right in the stomach. A deep cut it was. I still have the scar, probably always will. I started to scream so the boy covered my mouth again. When she was done, the guy dropped me, and the girl, she threw a piece of paper at me, and they both left me there. I passed out, and woke up in the hospital, Kris beside me.

         Celia did that to me. And at the time, she didn’t even apologize.

        

I keep walking Napoleon, trying not to think about that anymore. It always gets my upset when I do.  I start to approach a man and his dog, the same ones who Napoleon was trying to get to earlier. The dog ahead us is a fat bulldog. He takes a huge s**t. The owner looks at it, and keeps walking. What an a*****e, not even picking up after his own dog. I walk faster and catch up to him. I feel like I should yell at him, I don’t know, I guess I’m in a bad mood.

“Excuse me sir but-” I stop talking when I see who the man is.

There’s no doubt about it. It’s Reeve.

“Oh my god! Ana!” He says, and hugs me. I hug him back, hesitantly. “Wow, ever since we met at the pet store, I’ve been thinking about you all the time.” He says. I say me too, even though I haven’t; I haven’t had the time to.

“I was going to pick that up, but I don’t have a bag. If it makes you feel any better I feel bad about it.” He tells me.

I smile. “Aw, come on, it’s the… it’s the thought that counts.” I say. He laughs.

His hair has gotten a bit longer, and a lot shaggier.

“Well, you look great. No makeup suits you.” He says. I blush, and then my heart starts to race. I didn’t realize that my makeup had probably rubbed off from last night. I don’t know why it makes me so nervous when people see me without makeup.

“Oh, thanks. I think I’m in a better place then I was when I met you… sort of.” I say. Am I in a better place then I was? Has anything even changed?

“That’s great Ana! So, what are you up to? Maybe we could grab something to eat.” He says. I tell him that would be awesome. We come up with a plan to walk to his apartment, that’s coincidentally 4 blocks away from mine.

“We can drop of our dogs, and you can pick up little Napoleon after.” He tells me. Then we walk to his apartment.

“The whole living alone plan kind of fell through, so I have two roommates now. Ashley and Alex. You can meet them when we drop of the pets.”

We walk to his apartment door and once he opens it, Napoleon gets away and runs into the apartment. Reeve laughs, and assures me it’s fine. His apartment smells like cookies, but looks like s**t. There are clothes everywhere, and I see a bunch of pot laid out of a coffee table he has next to his nasty old couch and TV. Reeve tells me that only Ashley and Alex smoke that stuff. Not him. Ashley and Alex sit on the couch.

“Guys, this is Ana. Please don’t scare her.” He says to them. The girl stands up, and shakes my hand, smiling.

“Hi! I’m Alex. You’re gorgeous.” She says. Her hair is very long, and reaches down to about her waist, and her bangs are clipped back on her head. She wears big glasses, which she can totally pull of, around her dark brown eyes.

“Thank you! You’re more gorgeous!” I say, and smile at her. She smiles back and tells Reeve she likes me.

Next, the boy stands up. He’s only a little taller than me. He looks scrawny but buff at the same time. His skin is tan and his styled brown hair sticks up from his head. He has beautiful green eyes. He looks like he could be a model. He takes my hand and kisses it.

“Hello, my dear. I’m Ashley.” He says. I blush a little. Wow, I look stupid.

“Nice to meet you.” I say.

“I know what you’re thinking, Ana, Ashley is a girl’s name, right?” Reeve says. Ashley glares at him.

“Oh, f**k off Reeve.” He says, but laughs.

“Hey! You guys should stay and hang out here! Reeve can cook for all of us!” Alex says. I look at Reeve.

“Hm, are you a good cook?” I ask him.

“The best.” He says, smiling.