A Strange Sadness

The beginning of my depression.

Sometimes I honestly wish I could just fade away.

When everything gets to be too much for me to handle, 

and the panic attacks become frequent and regular again, 

and the cuts get deeper and darker again, 

and the crying gets louder and longer.

Sure I've contemplated suicide, but what about my family?

I'm not sad because I don't believe anyone loves or cares about me.

I know they do. I always have.

I don't really know why I'm sad. In fact, I'm not sure if I'm really sad.

I feel sad, but then again I don't. 

It's something more than being sad.

And I just get so tired.

Tired of being this strange, strange sad.

And I want to fade away, and not hurt anyone in the process, or myself.

Just slowly, painlessly, quietly,

Fade, 

Away.

Reviews

[kris reed]

Oh man, that was Great! The flow, the rhythm and pace, excellent! I also love how your poem fades away at the end. You penned the apathy, confusion and indecision of depression perfectly; your mind runs in knots trying to find the problem and in the end you only get tangled, tired, and worn out, but your poem does a great job of untangling the labyrinth of overwhelming sadness; keep writing and your sure to find the truth behind depression and your way out of it. Great job!