Condemnation's Verse (Remember The things)

Anger at my father, and a few other men/boys in my life who treated me not the way a human should be treated. Experimental, for the most part.

 

Remember The Things You Should’ve Kept

 

Condemnation’s verse

Washing over you

Flung out to see

A song of never-ending anguish

Already pushed it away

& you’ll never get it back

You lost the purpose

Lost the cause

Misunderstood

The meaning to this fight

Can’t deny the things you didn’t do,

So don’t forget

The things you’ve already missed.

Try to rely totally on yourself

And try to pretend

You need no one else

Never thought to lose

Such a precious beauty

But now she’s already gone

And there’s nothing to do

But keep going on.

Don’t try to tell her

She’s the one with the problems,

Cus she’s more based in reality

Than you’ve ever been,

Even with all the riches

In the material world.

Don’t deny,

Don’t forget,

But most of all,

Don’t reject.

Your anger

Washed away

Things you should’ve kept,

And now it’s time

To understand

The things you misused.

 

(Finished??)

Laurie

Feb 6th ‘06

Monday

(Listening to Disturbed‘s “Remember“)

Author's Note

Mmmm. More old ones? Rofl

Reviews

[KJVollaro]

And you said I was evil! This seems more like stream of angry (VERY angry) consciousness work than a poem, but for lack of a more apt description, poem will have to do. Honestly, there are some lines/ sections that I really liked, and some that I really didn't. Since I know you like critique (as I do) here goes:
Good stuff:
"A song of never-ending anguish'
"Can't deny the things you didn't do,
So don't forget
The things you've already missed."
"Your anger
Washed away
Things you should've kept,
And now it's time
To understand
The things you misused."

Ehh Stuff:
"Never thought to lose
Such a precious beauty"
"She's the one with the problems,
Cus she's more based in reality
Than you've ever been,"

Hope I'm helping! I know you said it's old, but that doesn't mean to give up on it...Keep Writing!

[T. R. Writer]

Okay... I hate to get all serious on you... but coming from the point of view of a therapist (me) who has worked with many high school girls to help them overcome various issues I have to say that I wished they could express themselves the way you did in this poem. It says so much and rings so true. So many high school girls in the program I work with have been used and misused by family, friends and boyfriends and they don't know how to express themselves the way you do and they rebel, shut down or act out. You gave me a great idea to try to get them to start expressing themselves creatively, maybe that will help the ones that seem to be the hardest to reach. Thank you for this... see how one poem can affect the lives of many :) I'll let you know how it goes.