Agenda

thinking good thoughts about the future.

 I will rise up each morning,

salt mines at the corner of my brown eyes,

wounds carefully sutured by sleep

 brew a hot cup of something

strong and sit on my veranda

while the aureole sun wakes

from it's burning bed,

and I will ask myself

“What do I want to do today?”

And the answer won’t be “I want to die"

My mind will not ruminate on the quietest,

Cleanest way to snuff out a life

and I won’t look down to find a hand gnarled with guilt,

nor will a lead heart be caught

uncomfortably in my throat

like a large fishbone

I will say,

"I’m alive and I am home

and this home needs fresh baked bread and butter

this home needs flowers

tulip bulbs for my garden

this home needs eggs and new paint for the walls

this home will make orange cupcakes for lunch

this home will go to market

to find fresh beef for soup

this home is out of malta

this home wants kisses on the top left corner

of her neck

this home wants to be loved wildly

boldly,

tonight, this home wants to be left alone

and this home wants to grow."