The Number of F***s I Give

I'll give you a hint. It's zero.

As I walk up to this school, smoking a cigarette, I'm reading this bounty I received.

Dear Mr.Deatrix,

We have come to find that a Mr.Bramling, a teacher at the high school of Burlon, is a high ranking member of the gang 'Beautiful Trees', a gang you know as, in a quote of yours, 'Those weird guys that wear trees.' We are willing to pay you 500,000 credits to bring him alive to our local emissary for interrogation. 

Sincerely,

The Unimensional Justice League

I do more work for these a******s, and I don't even get an honorable mention. I'm pretty sure they make more than I do for writing my name down.

Ah well. Let's get this job over with before Lilith wakes up and realizes I'm kidnapping a teacher during school.

I walk up to the door and throw my cigarette on the sidewalk as I walk inside.

"Excuse me. How'd you get in?" a scared desk attendant asks. Why's she scared?

"I used a door." I say, already annoyed.

"It was locked."

"No, it wasn't. I just pushed it and-" I stop mid-sentence as I see the door and the bent metal.

I forgot to control myself. My limiters must need to be adjusted. This is annoying.

"Hello, police. A man just broke into the school by breaking the door."

God damn it. F**k this s**t.

I just walk by her, stealing the teacher directory along the way.

323.

I take the elevator up. I light a cigarette.

The doors open on the second floor.

It's a young security shot. Gun already pointed at me.

I smack the gun aside and knock him out with one punch. I hit close doors and assume my ascent.

I short my cigarette and put it back in my pack.

This is gonna be a long day.

The doors open and there's a group of kids sitting outside a classroom, talking s**t about anything and everyone.

I ignore them and look for which way 323 would be.

"Look at this guy. Think he's a badass. I could knock him out in one hit."

I look right at the f****r who said this. Some black kid that thinks he's tough. Reminds of the one in American History X with his ugly face.

"Say that again. You little f**k."

"You're a b***h."

I grab him and throw him through a wall.

I walk down the hall to the sounds of terror.

318...319...320...321...322...

The door to 323 kicks open with an angry teacher holding a fireball.

I pull out my phone and check the picture on the bounty.

Wild red hair, blue eyes, freckles, thick eyebrows, and skinny as a stick.

Same guy.

"You come into my school and attack my students. You are a piece of s**t!" he yells, throwing the fireball at me.

I let it hit me, demonstrating how weak he is, He couldn't even make a single hair burn.

"Listen here, tree man. I have a bounty for you alive, you don't get a choice here."

"I'm Beautiful Tree, that's right. But you're the bad guy, not us!"

I walk up to him, he nervously steps back, readying another fireball.

I grab him and throw him out his classroom window. His screams are beautiful.

I look in the classroom and see a bounty I'd recognize anywhere.

The one that's eluded me since I first became a bounty hunter. The 5 million on a shapeshifter who likes to learn.

"Elrudia, you little f****r." I say, whipping out a pistol and shooting him in the face.

I take his picture, confirming his bounty and teleport to my bike, catching the teacher in the process.

"Oomph!"

I shot him with a tranq and strap him to the side of my bike and get on.

"Freeze, police!"

"I'm a bounty hunter. Relax, Jacob Deatrix, class S. I can do stuff like this and get away with it. You can't do anything."

"I can steal your bounty."

I stare at this guy.

They recently made it a law that any bounties, dead or alive, a officer can steal from a bounty hunter if they get the kill. They have to give half to the local police but they get the other half.

And it doesn't matter if it's only alive. They can kill them and get the full reward.

It's the law.

Short blonde hair, gray eyes, average height. The gun is your average 9mm.

"Don't even think about it. I can get off for killing a cop stealing my paycheck. Me doing all the work and you coming in and doing that can be considered stealing in court."

"You're no lawyer, you can't prove that."

I only got one chance.

"Do it and you die."

He pulls the trigger, I slice the bullet in half with my onyx katana, Katayana. Then I pull out Death and shoot him.

He writhes in pain on the ground as I walk up to him and kick his gun away.

"Listen a*****e. There's a little sentence I personally wrote into that law and it's because of guys like you. 'Bounty Hunters of class A and higher can prevent a stealing of a bounty with any measurable amount of force if necessary." I grin.

His face drains of blood and he begins to crawl away.

"Normally, I'm a general good guy. But hey, I'm only 15. I'm also not entirely sane. But that's forgivable, given my lifestyle. So in the truly bloody end, you just became the end."

I stab him in the same spot I shot him with Katayana, and charge it with sin energy.

I feel my ancestor, The Deatrixian, screaming for his death. Foaming at his teeth for sure. Katayana is blood red in sin, lightning arcing across the blade.

FINISH HIM!

I was going to anyway, just let it be done right.

"Welcome to the world of grays, I'm your host, Jacob Deatrix." I say, smiling.

I twist the blade left then I take it home,twisting it like a motorcycle about to go 500 mph, and the sin energy enters him, filling him up, and making him explode.

His blood rains above me for a few seconds.

"Cleanrific." I say, triggering the spell to clean myself.

I get on the bike, lighting my short with a fireball, and drive off to the sounds of sirens.