Checkmate

Checkmate

 

Embitterment, betrayal, the horsemen take sides

The throngs of foot soldiers like waves of the tide

Line up in formation to deliver the due

Red sky, meets battlefield, color and hue

 

Face off solutions make way for the sorrow

Time crawls, but minds race for the dawn of the morrow

Archers and swordsman await commander’s behest

And hearts pound like thunder in each warrior’s chest

 

Fear is the embodied song of the day

The first to attack will set anger astray

And all will turn harsh and each to their need

Will fight to the end for the sake of all greed

 

Hand will fight hand and carnage lay ‘bout

The destruction of the clash will leave no one out

The banners will wave and breast plates to cave

At the strike of the sword and smite of the stave

 

And others will look on with pity and shame

At the puzzle unfolding, as if it’s a game

And King will strike King with the power of Pawn

But none shall be victors at the break of the dawn

 

For unstoppable forces, unbreakable bend

Each side advancing till end leads to end

Crushed by deceit, betrayal and lies

Such is the carnage when love finally dies

 

 

Reviews

[Persnickety]

Over the years I have developed a cynicism for poets. I find far too many people consider themselves a poet simply because they can rhyme. Even on this site profile after profile after profile you find a poet. I rarely enjoy the poems I read, so imagine my surprise and excitement to find this lily among the thorns.

The entire poem is fluid. I find I often trip over stanzas or word choice, but this is beautifully executed. The metaphor is solid and the end is a welcomed twist.

I look forward to reading more from you, and I don't often say that to a poet. haha.

[Whispering Aspen]

I love the voice of your work. It's a storyteller's theme and that is difficult for most to achieve. Kudos to you on that. I was a bit surprised at the end when I realized what you were actually talking about was love, and the bitter battle that takes place when it ends. Ironic, isn't it, that when we find love is over it is difficult not to battle in an attempt to destroy that which we once deeply cherished. This is a very thought provoking piece. I think I shall have to read it again, maybe a few more times before I have finished digesting the message here entirely. That is good poetry! Thank you for sharing this!

[Graybeard]

Mike,
This is a very interesting poem. That are a lot of thinks I enjoy about it, especially some of the vivid imagery. There are also some things I feel that aren't working so well. But I don't want to give a full review/critique right now...I'd rather ask a question. The title and a lot of the imagery obviously invoke images of chess (and do so quite effectively I might add). However, the very last line takes a dramatic and unexpected step away from where the reader might think the poem was originally going...everything preceding this one line is a reference to chess or war and then suddenly the narrator is talking about love. Personally, I like the shock and surprise. It caught me completely off guard and made me give the poem another reading...However, with only this one line mentioning anything about love and no other supporting information about who or what is loved the reader can only make a guess as to what is really happening here. So my question is, what that your intent or were you alluding to something (e.g. the Queen) that I've completely missed.