on maturity

Some thoughts on the definition of maturity and how it relates to our humanity.

Maturity is an ever elusive and abstract term, isn't it? Some would say it's beyond definition, so let's look at what the dictionary has to say:

ma·ture
1.        complete in natural growth or development, as plant and animal forms: a mature rose bush.
3.        fully developed in body or mind, as a person: a mature woman.
4.        pertaining to or characteristic of full development: a mature appearance; fruit with a mature softness.
5.        completed, perfected, or elaborated in full by the mind: mature plans.

I picked out 4 choice definitions from dictionary.com - out of over 17. So we can see that even with the aid of the dictionary, it's just as elusive as before. But we can draw a couple of hints to guide us in the right direction from the aforementioned definitions.

One, maturity refers to "completeness", coming full circle in human development and evolution. Following upon that pattern of thought, calling someone 'immature' pretty much means that they haven't reached finality in human growth. None of us have, and the term immature shouldn't even be in our vocabulary when referring to other people. Of course, I'm guilty of calling people immature, we all are - and we usually use this term when we think someone is LESS mature than us (i.e. hasn't come as far in their development). But this can derive from any number of things, and it doesn't necessarily mean that that person has some sort of personality defect or inadequacy. Emotional traumas, difficult home lives, social awkwardness, heavy drug use (I know from personal experience) can all cause a stunt in the growth of maturity - a stunt that's hardly irreversible and should never be treated as such.

Two, if maturity means coming full circle in our human development, if pure and complete maturity means achieving the highest state of human evolution - then true maturity can only be achieved by EMBRACING our humanity, not hiding from it and denying it. In today's society, there's been a growing trend of individuals stifling emotion and feelings to aid their "maturity". Ignoring emotion is not an effective coping mechanism, and it should never be treated as such. In Buddhist culture, students are taught to feel their emotions, embrace them, but not let them CONTROL them. And there's a huge difference! When you feel angry, you stop, take a step outside of yourself, and tell yourself "I'm feeling angry." You then proceed to analyze why exactly you're feeling angry (for myself, it's usually because a situation is out of my control) - and suddenly, you are no longer bound by your anger. You still feel the emotion, but the rage and fury that was in control of your being seconds before has loosened its' grip. This applies to all emotions, and with practice, emotions and feelings such as happiness, ecstasy, excitement, passion, can all be embraced, while the fear, regret, anger, distress that bind us into undesirable positions can be felt, but control is still in our hands. Once again, ignoring and denying emotion will not help one cope. It never has - and never will. It is human to feel emotion - and by stifling our humanity, we cause all sorts of physical, mental and spiritual blockages that eventually catapult down on top of us.

And I'd like to touch on something quickly, because it's something that's been plaguing me recently. There's been this public derision of my generation, of the "emo/scene" culture that has seethed its' tentacles into society. And while you may not like the fashion, while you may not like the music, while you may not like the boys and you may not like the girls - there is one undeniable fact. There is nothing new about "emo" except the term. Teenagers have always - and will always embrace their emotion! It's HUMAN. And for decades, the emotions that individuals have felt and the feelings they have coddled have been recorded through one very powerful medium. Music. Listen to nearly any artist from the 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s and on and you will find emotion being carried across sound waves and vibrations right into the very core of your being. There is, however, a trend of music being a tad bit more depressing lately - and the answer doesn't lie in any deficiency with modern culture or my generation. In previous generations it would've been unheard of for a band of 17 and 18 year olds to become one of the most famous bands in American culture. It's commonplace nowadays, and it's only because that's what sells! You don't have to like it, but it's nothing new for teenagers to feel emotion. It's propagated into the ether now, sure. But it's not new. It really isn't.

My name is Aaron Sturgis, and I am an emotional creature. I feel the world around me, and it affects me in different ways on each and every day. I embrace this - and it is part of what makes me Aaron. I am a human.

Author's Note

Pasted directly from my Myspace - some parts are bolded for emphasis. Constructive criticism is always welcome, remember this is intended mainly as a rant. These are MY opinions.