THE ROADS

Some times, I contemplate what life would be like, if I had walked down a different trail.
Would I feel loved?
Appreciated, happy?
Or the same as I do now.
Alone, neglected, forgotten and stale.
Or perhaps, that curious trail
Would have led me down an even darker road.
A narrow space, that never existed.
Swallowing my soul, even though I resisted.
Floating about, unheard and unseen by the living,
Not taking from the well of life.
But also unable to be one of the giving.
I don’t know why, on these thoughts I dwell.
I’m pretty certain, all these
highways my feet have
Have traveled,
Will eventually land my soul in hell.
I’ve been told to believe, and repent.
All my sins forgiven, matter not, the magnitude or event.
You can go on, swallowing the pill of faith which you’ve been sold.
Following all of the rules, they so convincingly told.
But.what if in the end,
Rather than ascending to heaven on the highway of gold.
You’re walking beside me through the darkness.
Together down the very same road.

Reviews

[Bare trees]

In this poem, the reader (me) is suggested a scenario that is a bit frightening to contemplate. Perhaps there is no gold stairway to heaven or even a heaven at all. Perhaps the road not taken would have led to the same ends. The what if of the question can feel daunting to imagine. Its dark and its haunting. As is this poem.

[Resa]

I cant tell if you like or hated this poem.
either way, thank you for reading :)

[Bare trees]

lol I liked it.

[Resa]

Thank you:)

[chimetime]

The sense of darkness is strong this one, well done atmosphere. One thing I've never seen is asking the reader to consider where they are at compared to people who feel lost in the dark.

Only possible suggestion is revising or omitting the following lines. My eyes kind of glazed when reading these particular lines.

"A narrow space, that never existed.
Swallowing my soul, even though I resisted.
Floating about, unheard and unseen by the living,
Not taking from the well of life.
But also unable to be one of the giving.
I don’t know why, on these thoughts I dwell. "

[Resa]

Not sure why you feel that I should remove those particular lines.
But I, do appreciate your honest input:)
Thank you!

[G.W. Saitreux]

Beautiful poem, I feel this flowing to make a very solid point and it's quite pervasive. Your use of different words for the same thing, roads, was alluring and contributed to the overall direction of the piece. I also sensed a rhythm in the rhyme scheme that increasingly delivered the message. I love this poem!

[Resa]

Thank you so much for reading, and your kind review:)