Do You Know How I Feel?

A Chapter by Mickey Hyde

'Where to park, where to park..' Jamie thought to herself as she pulled into the packed library after dropping Kragen off. Noticing a van leaving from a close parking spot, she drove ahead and put her blinker on, satisfied that she had gotten it before anyone else.

When parked, she grabbed her books and papers in one hand, and struggled to get her bag strap over her shoulder as she walked to the main enterance of the Library.

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He was always at work, just barely to the doors with only minutes before he was supposed to show up. Seth was thankful that he had looked at the school clock when he had, because if not he would have been late for sure.

Running at a faster pace now, he was almost to there. Seeing a girl walk onto the sidewalk, he had no time to stop before he collided with her and sent them both flying to the ground, books and papers scattering everywhere.

"I'm so sorry," Seth said immeadiatley as he began picking up some of the papers and putting them into a little pile.

"Yeah," the girl said under her breathe, but he was still able to hear, and he recognized the voice surprisingly well. Looking up, he saw Jamie there on the floor, right across from him.

Jamie sat up onto her knees, brushing a few strands of hair out of her face before looking up at guy who had knocked her down. She was a bit shocked to see the face of Seth Gorrin staring right back at her.

Neither of them said a word, or a moved an inch, until Jamie had grown uncomfortable under his admiring stare and looked away, blushing as she began to gather her own things.

"Um..here," Seth handed her the papers he had already grabbed. He still couldn't believe it. Jamie , the one he was trying so hard to remember and forget, was here just a foot away from him.

Finally tearing his eyes away from her, he stood up easily and offered her a hand to get up, which she took and was surprised again at how tall he was.

'Wow.. how could I have not noticed this before?' She asked herself as she looked up at him.

"Thanks," she said, unsure of anything else to say. Soon it began to get awkward, just the both of them standing there.

But Seth knew what he had to do, and knew what he had to say. He had already thought of this before, thought of how he s hould apologize to her. Looking at her again, he swallowed and breathed in before begining to talk.

"Look, I'm sorry about the whole Ruby's thing.... It was completely rude of me and I shou-"

"No, no it's okay. I get it." Jamie said. Deep down, she knew that he would have brought it up, but for some reason she couldn't understand, she didn't want him apologizing. She just wanted to be near him.

She smiled awkwardly at him, and he did nothing except look at her. Did she really understand?

"It's just, um.. I wasn't.." He racked his mind for a believable lie, and he grew to be a decent liar over the years from people always asking him what happend and why he had so many bruises.. but this time, he felt like he couldn't lie to Jamie. He wouldn't.

"I just had... I felt... I remembered some stuff about my mom," his eyes went to the floor, looking away from Jamie for one of the first times. "and I didn't exaclty... like.. it." He wondered if he was making sense at all, if she in some way understood how it felt to lose someone.

What he didn't know though, was that she knew that feeling a lot more than he could guess.