Leaving

I went to the beach today (January 12th, 2008) with a blanket and a pack of cigarettes.  Sat on a rock bundled up like a newborn, and watched the waves roll in.  The sky was blue, but still dull and cloudy and I could see for miles across the fresh water.  I went to say goodbye because I knew it would be months before I would return.  Not by choice, but by a force much greater than free will: future.  As I lit my bad habit I looked down shielding the flame from the wind and saw leaves surrounding my pedestal.  My breath came easier because autumn's my favorite.  I looked up to see the water coming closer, creeping up through caverns between smooth rocks.  The wind blew harder and ruffled the protective blanket.  I took one more drag and held my breath.  There was something about that moment I wanted to keep forever.  Everything about that moment I wanted to keep forever.  My eyes welled and I couldn't tell if it was the wind.

Reviews

[Pakino]

This is a good start to extend the story. A little grammar issues but everyone has grammar issues so no worries.
At the moment I consider it more of a poem then a story Go deeper and talk about the characters, conflict etc.