I think I'm afraid of being alone

I think I'm afraid of being alone 

It's kind of ironic that I fear that 

Seeing that I am always alone 

I think I'm just afraid of the fact that one day

There will be people around who will look at me and turn away

Pretending that I do not exist

Maybe that's my fear 

The fear of being forgotten 

But I believe my fear goes far deeper than that

I fear that all the words that I write will be all that I have left

Maybe that's what I'm afraid 

Being left alone with my words and my mind  

I'm afraid of being alone and no that doesn't just mean having no one around

I'm afraid of being lonely in a room full of people

I'm afraid of the feeling of being alone more so then the very action of it

I have a lot of fears and maybe it's based on my childhood traumas

I spent hours locked away in my room as everyone laughed and talked in the living room

Left with nothing but my mind and my words and my loneliness

I think that's when my fear began to take form

The feeling of despair and discouragement 

I think what I'm afraid of is going back there

To that deep depression

Maybe my definition of loneliness is different then yours

I think I'm afraid of being alone 

And no not just being left behind