Unromantic comedy

All the toys in a box

Dropped in a shallow pool

Man up...go and get them

But you’re too clever

A teaspoon of water is just as deadly

 

Real men don’t cry

Dangerous women can’t bear the sound

Your life time of sobs bottled up

I don’t care

I deal in power

 

Home hunting place for two

We found a house

But that’s not enough room

For me to not be with you

 

The truth is easier to remember

If you use words to lie

Toes curling. Fingers scratching

Eyes rolling, closing. Shut

 

The grass is wet

The summer is warm

Children dance in puddles

Unaware of you and me

And what we are, no more

Reviews

[Ees]

I love the title, it drew me in.
The poem was so much more sad than I expected. This is a well written poem. What I enjoyed most was the sense of acceptance, the statements rather then the questions. This is what it is, and there is a great deal of beauty in speaking so plainly of a situation.
Great job!

[Mia]

Thank you so much Ees...I'm glad for your visit and your kind compliments are the cherry on top!

[Dye]

Wow, this one is fantastic. A perfect description of a failed relationship. I liked all the stanza but the third and forth had the best wording for me.

[Mia]

Thank you...this stings a little even now, I suppose that just means I had a love worth losing. Again, thank you!

[TLK]

I'm not quite sure how all this hangs together. Especially the last line of the first stanza.

[Mia]

Thanks for the read...you win some you lose some ey! :)

[Dr. Wood ?]

wow...this is really good....I am not surprised just impressed..Terrific third verse and a terrific poem

[Mia]

Thank you Doc!

[Debbie_Philly]

Deeply felt piece !! Really good !! :)

[Mia]

Thank you Debbie, glad you popped by :)

[MOON]

Poignant striking write Mia , you conveyed all the emotions so well. Last line says it all. Like this stanza particularly Home hunting place for two

We found a house

But that’s not enough room

For me to not be with you

[Mia]

Thank you Moon :) I always appreciate your time and comments. I will be around to see what you've been up to in my absence :)

[spiritwind]

Whoa!!
Mia!! This is absolutely a word feast
perhaps served at the funeral of a relationship
but a feast of wisdom and emotion
just the same.
Oh, please send me read requests... I didn't know what they were for months and when I finally woke up, I had over 400... I am now down to 270 +... but I try to read at least one poem per poet and I would like that to include you!

[Mia]

It also took me some time to figure out what a read requests were, I will send you some...but maybe I should give you time to get that number down :)
Thank you for stopping by and for your kind words, they are always appreciated! Hope you are well friend!

[Pax]

You've done yourself an great job on this poem my friend...
each stanza grows into a different story
as if growing for experienced...
Failure is always a door step ahead of us and always we are unaware of that i guess.
a great year for a coming new year..
cheers to a new year my friend...

[Mia]

Pax my dear friend, thank you popping by despite my absence...I promise to catch up soon soon. I have missed you! Hope the new year is treating you well and thank you for the kind wishes! I won't be a stranger!!

[Pax]

oh... miss u too dear friend... hope all is well to you too... great to have you back... and your always welcome...

[Mia]

:D

[Horizon K.]

There is something very cold in this. "Dangerous women can’t bear the sound... I don’t care, I deal in power." Looking back, perhaps with dark feelings, on a failed relationship, seeing things that eyes had closed and rolled to. And in the end, life goes on for everyone else no matter where we fall. Beautiful tragic poem Mia.

[Mia]

Thank you HK, very perceptive review and yes, yes you are very right. Sorry for the long absence!

[Horizon K.]

I missed you Mia!

[An owl on the moon]

Moving so powerfully through the shadows... the edges of life.. of wanting.. of wishing... There is a haunted feel even in the the summer's warm wonder.

[Mia]

Thank you for stopping by and having a read, always appreciated dear Craig