A Real Poem

I hope no one is offended by this. It is not meant to be incendiary. It is just my attempt to express what it feels like when something I've written goes unnoticed.

If I were to write a real poem,
It would be about the way I feel,
When I've finally finished a piece
--the spitting image of my soul in prose--
And it's left unread, unreviewed,
Somehow managing to waste space,
In the ether of limitless internet.
It would be pissy, and bitter, and it wouldn't rhyme,
But at least it would be honest.
At least I could read it and say,
"Well, it doesn't sound pretty,
And it makes you sound ungrateful,
To the world's greatest writers,
who all happen to write on this site,
and who happen to spin the deepest,
truest, most beautiful, honest, heartfelt,
grammarly perfect strands of words and stanzas,
that anyone ever posted to the internet,
But at least you have your dignity."
Then I would remember that I don't,
Because expressing a common complaint,
Is about the same as posting porn,
To boost your click count, and self esteem.
To be honest, THAT is how I feel
When I share love, and unrequited
comments.
THAT is what a real poem would say.

Author's Note

Honestly, doesn't anyone else ever feel under-appreciated sometimes, especially beside reviews written in superlatives only? I may not be a great writer, but I'm not wrong that this happens sometimes. I'm not even innocent, I'm just saying.

I'm adding this addendum, because I think this piece needs some clarification about my own views. I'm keeping the original description and author's notes above so that people can see how I expected it to be received when I first wrote it, or rather, how I was afraid it might be received.

This poem doesn't argue that we should be harsher critics. Rather, it is about the realization that you can get more reviews by "brown nosing" than by pouring your heart into a piece. That is why it's not only about work going unnoticed, but about the hyperbole that occurs in some comment sections.
Nor do I hate or blame this website. I think overall a writers quality can earn him or her attention on here. It's just a pity that attention can be earned more easily through flattery.
An example (which I won't seek out now, but remember clearly) is seeing a poem riddled with grammar errors (entirely pardonable). But beneath a slough of positive reviews was one particularly encouraging response which included something to the effect of "as for grammar, you're perfect!"
Boo, Hiss! You don't have to bash the poet, but for God's sake don't lie to him!

Reviews

[Pax]

it's left unread, unreviewed,
Somehow managing to waste space,
In the ether of limitless internet.

My friend, I have taken a long time to be able to finally put my words in this review. Maybe because I have been busy and moody lately, that I rarely review from the last few months. It must be the holidays that makes me a little more edgy than ever.

First off, Know that there is nothing offending about this piece. I like the honest feel of your words.

So here I am, reading this again, feeling the loneliness of this piece – the unrequited
comments that you feel when you shared a feeling, insight, a comment or even a critique every time you give a review. For now, I just give and give to those pieces I’ve read that touches my heart and mind, provoking the words just to overflow.

I am not perfect in reviewing, even in grammar I still lack the skills, I have put in my profile that I am not a professional. I am just an aspiring artist, that’s what I always said. Because almost all of us are one. We expressed our hearts out into words in poetry and even in reviews.

You said that:
“It's just a pity that attention can be earned more easily through flattery.”

In my starting days as a new member of the sites, I never knew how a review goes. Flattery was just the first choice to do, I admit, I do that… because at some point we are humans, we do unnecessary things to get something. I don’t do that much now, I write what I felt and think is just fair and right.

I guess we are here to grow as a person, better that who we are in the past. Reading those heartfelt poems, makes me learn many things not only about our nature, but also the deepest core values you have. I guess in this piece shows that, you want to receive the critical technicalities about your piece and flattery is not what you want, honesty is at best as possible. Perhaps I am wrong in seeing something in this piece. Still you are a good writer my friend.

The quality of the piece doesn’t measure on the amount of feedback it received, there are too many unreviewed pieces in this site that are on which is great, and there are too many pieces that are highly reviewed even though it lacks something. So somehow it is unbalance sometimes but that’s how it goes here. Even in the real world, many are under-appreciated. I guess it’s just a matter on how you open your heart to many and on this case, you did that in this piece. I think one thing I learned to grow, or to be able to improve your writing is read, read and read some more, and then write, write and write some more as well. It’s either you do it in your review or do it in your one pieces. I think we grow as we interact with other authors. Learn something from them as they learn something from you too, but you’ll always keep in mind to be your own artistry. I think you cannot grow if your too consume in your own world, go out and explore your boundaries. I call it: EE, explore and experiment.

This piece can explore many things in reality and on the internet. A very well expressed piece my friend.

[Rachelle]

Bulls-eye! How can you grow when everyone gives you a thumbs-up?

[Epipsychologist]

Exactly. I don't think we need to push people or anything, but it starts to feel pointless if you get the same praise regardless of how hard you work. Someone e-mailed me once that they were ready to give up on this site. I didn't see the e-mail until about a month later (I had taken a break) and that person deleted their account.

The point is, I think people who are trying to get better are at way more risk of feeling unappreciated than people who post sob stories, and they are the one's who lose when reviewers arbitrarily praise poets who ask for attention.

Thanks for reviewing Sweetblind

[Sioranth Smith]

Congrats on your contest win. :)

I read something here on the forums the other week where there was a group of writers basically saying that writing the stereotypical emotional poetry wasn't "real poetry," and one person even went so far as to say s/he "never writes from personal experience." (I found that an odd statement since all poetry is based on opinion or personal view of something or personal idea/concept, but that's a whole other conversation!) I think constructive criticism is an invaluable tool to every writer. I think making a blanket statement about "you're poetry doesn't count/isn't real poetry" just because it's cliche or young or "too personal" though is a real disservice, especially to young writers. Your poem reminded me of that encounter.

As a side note, after reading your profile. I waffled between both English and Psychology as college majors so I can absolutely see where you're coming from there. I ended up in medical though, go figure.

[Epipsychologist]

Thanks Sioranth,

I'd like to check those forums out. I meant to express a kind of critical moment that I think everyone who stays on this site experiences at some point, that probably explains why there would be a divide in opinion. That said, this poem does not, cannot, sum up my sentiments toward writings and responses.

Also, I think psych has been invaluable in helping me with English, so I would recommend that combo to anyone.
Thanks for the review.

[Tennessee]

It is a real poem. I liked it because it was indeed honest. You said what needed to be said. And one other thing don't worry so much if you offend anyone, I honestly think if some people aren't offended and hating on you than you ain't doing it right. Say whatever your head tells you to say just make sure you chose the words you mean. If you piss some people off than good, at least they are talking about you. They will remember you. Chill man, some people won't f*****g get it but you can't please everyone. PIss some people off, it's fun. As I said I liked it because yes it is honest and true, rarely seen anymore. I think this one is good.

[Epipsychologist]

Thank you Tennessee.
This response makes me want to write some rock and roll stories, if that makes sense.

[Tennessee]

It does. I love rock and roll why not?

[kdarcy]

Appreciated your authors note, many would agree with you. I find myself offering my opinion more often on comments that I leave. I myself, like it when someone gets the point of my piece. If there is some confusion in how I got it down on paper, the reader instead should tell me and not fill in the blanks. The reviewer, not knowing, isn't helping the writer to grow and improve their talent. We all lose by this, especially if you like my style- it could be made so much more for both of us. It's the small voices that I read, that stay with me. We are all great in our own realms ... this is but one place to share our greatness with each other in this vast cyber world. It would be a pleasure to stroll through your other offerings here. Be well

[Epipsychologist]

Thank you, kdarcy. I agree with this review entirely. We don't have to cultivate writers on this site to our particular ideal of a writer, but if we leave a review that praises things we don't actually like we could be preventing that writer from finding a voice that connects with people.
This is basically a reiteration of your comment, I guess, but I appreciate your response.
Thanks.

[Baby Ricochet]

Coming from the heart poetically means different things. I have a lot of the trickster archetype in me so one could say my funny poems are coming from the heart (I think they are) My pieces about my deployments are coming from a very dark hole that I only express when I'm in one of my "moods." I vowed I'd stop posting them but it's hard not to write about the most defining time period of your life. Getting reviews has to do with how often you review your friends and if they review back. At the moment I have 191 friends and I get on average 10 reviews on a typical piece. More if the piece is really funny or the odd stroke of brilliance like "Ice house of Broken gears" or "Slaughter House Dreams." So far as the one line, flip remarks I often leave as reviews part of that is me being a first rate wisenheimer and part of it's to do with time management. I only got so much time to play on this site and I have a s**t load of RR'S. about 430 at present. Obviously I'll never read them all but I do like to read at least some of them so my flip remark in the review box is me saying "Yo. I read your stupid poem." You seem like a thoughtful, intellectual type of guy. Just keep on posting and we'll keep on reading. Take care bro.

[Marie]

You know how flippant and scarastic I am, Baby R.; I'm glad you've alwaus been okay with it. Not all writers are.

[Rita L. Sev]

Many of us feel this same way, Epipsych. You pour your heart into a piece, and there it sits, alone and unread. As for those extolling reviews - Reviewers may think that the ego of a writer can be fragile - especially a young writer. Of course, I enjoy getting a favorable review - but I appreciate the critical ones. I also share your pet peeve about lavishing praise on a poem rife with errors.

[Epipsychologist]

Thanks for the review Rita. I'm afraid this poem makes me seem more afraid of not getting reviewed than I actually am. It is more of a peeve of mine, but for the poem to work I had to tap into that thing I hate, and the things I'm sometimes afraid to say.
Anyway, thanks for the review.

[Abdul Aziz]

Haha, is it wrong if I laughed upon reading this? You've encapsulated some of the complaints we've long had. Saccharine reviews, priority based on favouritism and not quality, etc etc. I've been on the Cafe for upwards of 3 years. But I have come to realise that this place is, as Angi calls it, the 'Facebook of poetry'.. and stories. Sometimes, it is hard on us when we write poems we think deserve to be read by at least a few people, but all we see are sweet nothings in the review sections of other poems. It all comes together to frustrate us, I think. But fret not, I have found that to get constructive criticism, you have to give it first. There are always people here who aren't afraid to point out honestly what they didn't like in a poem, so I'm sure it's not all that bad. Keep writing, and hopefully, it will get better :)

[Epipsychologist]

Thanks for the review, AA. I have fun seeing whether or not a poem gets reads, and if it doesn't, oh well.
But thank you for the encouragement, and the honest response.

[Lydia Shutter]

I would rather have a pleasant review than a negative one....but I think all poetry is valid poetry. I have commented on poetry that is as far from my feelings as Fort Lauderdale is from the North Pole. It is the imagery and the metaphor I enjoy...it draws me in. If I read a poem that does nothing for me, I would rather not comment at all than leave a nasty review. That is just me though. Under appreciated? Well, yes, I do feel that way when I post a poem and for 12 - 20 hours it has a lot of views and only one or two reviews. That's life in the big city though....unfortunately. This poem expresses your views well. By the way, not all poetry has to rhyme! Lydi**

[Epipsychologist]

Thank you Lydia.
This poem actually says nothing about leaving negative comments. I have nothing against honest, light criticism. I just get a little sick from saccharine reviews that seem dishonest to me.

[Angi]

I regularly check the writing page looking for titles that pop out at me. This one did. I have found that I may have a different opinion (than him or her or you) as to what constitutes a 'real' poem. Some people really, really love reading and writing romance poetry. Some people are into erotica or horror or even gore. The list goes on and on. Personally, I feel anything goes, as long as it is a fresh and new way of saying something. For me, it is hit and miss on what I read, depending what is flowing through my personal feed and what I find on the writers/writing pages. If I seek you out, you can bet I have seen something in your work that has struck me somehow. If someone leaves a comment on my work, I try to reciprocate to get that person's work more exposure. Even if that poets work isn't something that grabs me by the scruff and makes me sit up, (sometimes I find a gem. I love it when that happens!) it may have that effect on another reader, someone may see it, (like I saw this one) and feel a connection. I always try to leave honest feedback and/or thoughts on any connection to the piece I might feel. I have gotten some of those bland comments on my work and I always wonder if they even bothered to read it at all. I can be quite frustrating. It seems I have had stong feelings regarding the content of this particular piece. I apologise for leaving a book here in this review box. Angi~

[Epipsychologist]

Thanks for the review Angi.
In this poem I was only trying to express how I feel when I write something that I think is good (relative to my other works) and it goes unnoticed, but poems that seem to lack merit (i.e. creative thought) are basically trending with unrealistic praise.

I was actually quite nervous about posting it, but then I thought about what it meant that I was afraid this would be taken the wrong way. Then I thought that if it roused that kind of feeling in me, it was probably worth posting.

Again, thanks for reviewing. I like that your comment was in depth. And actually I agree with most it. It's only when I feel slighted that I get all pissy, and bitter, and stop rhyming! (most of the time I feel I get fair reviews).

[Epipsychologist]

Also, another irony of this piece is that it went more than a full day (well past the point usual peak of a piece in the news feed) to get noticed. Understand that I say this with a smile on my face, thinking back to that first day after I posted it and thinking "well, y'know." Haha, I'm glad people noticed it though.

[Angi]

I was trying to give you my thoughts on how I approach poetry on this site. It is funny, Epi (I hope you don't mind the short) I originally searched out a poetry site for hard, honest critique. That is not what Writer's Cafe is about (for the most part.) I call it the Facebook of Poetry. I have met so many awesome people here, that I just accept if for what it is and continue on my journey to find poetry that knocks my socks off. I will check out some of your other stuff. You would never have known you were a rhymer except for your reply up there! I have tried rhyming, but it usually feels forced when I do it.

[Epipsychologist]

I'm not usually a rhymer, actually, but I usually like poems that rhyme (is that a quirk of mine?). I would say that I basically had the same experience as you with this site. It has taught me more about what it means to be a writer than what I thought it would teach me, but that is mainly a good thing.