prince charming

like a wobbly wheel

he stumbled in

beach in his hair

booze on his breath

the bonfire still

in his eyes

Reviews

[WhatCanISay]

I love it for reasons I can't put words to but the image is so crystal clear with just a few lines. Excellent writing, really.

[AYVID N]

"the bonfire still
in his eyes"

This is your best!

[Everett DeValle]

Like Jim Morrison...'booze on his breath/the bonfire still/in his eyes...awesome.

[Dennis A. Clark]

Thanks. You've hit on one of my major influences.

[Everett DeValle]

You're welcome...Thank you for your friendship...Jim is an influence of mine, as well...but in theory...meaning, there will only be one Jim Morrison...but I get what he did...but you have something too...and I hope you keep using your voice. :)

[The Dreamer]

well now - that' s a new definition for prince charming!
loved the last two lines ...

[Dennis A. Clark]

Thanks, Dreamer. I go for irony.

[MOON]

Ha ha prince not so charming, lovely!

[Dennis A. Clark]

Right, he's ragged, rough around the edges.

[Alisa Js]

Aloha,

Love the vivid emotional imagery behind the visuals.

Well done, you!

Alisa ;-)

[Dennis A. Clark]

"Emotional imagery"--I like that.

[Alisa Js]

It makes sense, doesn't it when you consider the emotional element of your piece? Looking forward to reading your thoughts on my work.

alisa ;-)

[Dennis A. Clark]

Yes, it does make sense. You picked up on one of my principles: not to use concept and emotion words in my poems (generally), but to convey those ideas through concrete sensory details.

[Alisa Js]

:-)

[Carolann Dowsett]

I love this, reminds me of all those bonfire lit parties we used to have on the beach. Great imagery.

[Dennis A. Clark]

Thanks. Glad it sparked a memory.